Today, I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I started rapping. I realized the room was not empty when, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joined in. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, thinking I was alone in a public bathroom, I started singing the words to my favorite song. A minute later that I heard a toilet flush, so I just sat there petrified. The other person sarcastically picked up the singing from where I left off. FML
Today, I was taking a dump in a public toilet, when a guy in the next stall started drunkenly rapping. He kept trying to get me to rap along with him, eventually bashing the wall and threatening to bust my face in if I didn't. I soon found out I can rap to Slob On My Knob pretty well. FML
Today, while using a public bathroom, I was singing to myself because I thought I was alone and not in a rush. When I opened the door, three people were waiting in line. One of them rushed in behind me, another seemed really annoyed, and the third person said, "I love that song!", confirming that they heard everything FML
Today, I used the restroom at a mall. I thought I was alone, so I started singing. When I got out of the stall, there were men staring at me. Not only did I embarrass myself with my own singing, I'd accidentally used the men's restroom too. FML
Today, I was in a stall in a public restroom. Someone came in and started using one of the urinals. Somehow, before I knew it, I found I had just loudly whispered, "SOMEbody's taking a piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiss." FML
Today, I was in a public restroom trying to take a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself, "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard, "No you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud. And that I wasn't alone. FML
Today, I was at a local talent show and during a piano performance I had to go to the bathroom. I sang along in the bathroom but was unaware how loud I was until I walked out and everyone started applauding me while the pianist was still playing. FML
Today, I went to take a dump at work. The silence in the room was deafening, and I ended up singing to myself. After I proudly finished, there was a short silence, followed by a coworker in the next stall saying, "Um... don't quit the day job, Rick." I'll never live this down. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom at a concert when I realized I was locked in. The door was jammed, and there was no way out. I knocked, I tried to force it, I even climbed through the air vent to escape, only to end up covered in dust and toilet paper. Meanwhile, people outside could hear me yelling “HELP!” for a solid 20 minutes. FML
Today, I was singing my heart out in the shower, convinced I was alone. Turns out my roommate had friends over, and they could hear everything through the bathroom vent. Now, they keep requesting encore performances of my renditions of songs by The Smiths. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 39
As weird as it sounds, I really wish I had been there.
DeidaraAkatsuki 17
Because when when you're alone on the toilet, your inner rapper bursts out.
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Comments (173)
rebelsrock 17
*Hey, I'm alone!* Palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy. There's vomit on his sweater already, moms spaghetti, he's nervous. But on the surface he looks calms and ready to drop bombs, but he keeps on forgetting what he wrote down the whole crowd oh so loud, he opens his mouth but the words won't come out. He's choking, how? Everybody's joking now, the clocks run out, times up, over blow! *other person* *here's my one shot* YOU BETTER LOSE YOURSELF IN THE MUSIC THE MOMENT YOU BETTER NEVER LET IT GO!
davincidasecond 24
Those lyrics were in my head when I read the fml lol
xxGheTToGumbYxx 16
Ha! I was singing the same song in my head as well.
MayaTheBee_fml 10
Is it weird when this song brings back good memories?
JustAReaderZZZZ 10
you missed part of that first verse. there's still more before the chorus starts. (:
TheNewGuy03 28
He opens his asshole and looks to drop bombs
freshko21 6
Hey, at least you didn't get a bad rap.
kiwienne 21
I read something else than "rapping" ._.
A_Dead_Fish32 8
You thought he was tapping the stall door? Get your mind out of the gutter.
kiwienne 21
#38 - Yep, definitely tapping. That's it ;)
lukeyhoward79236 17
This makes me think of that family guy episode where they have that farting competition in the toilets.
Garagedwella 26
Ha ha that was epic Michael Moore vs Peter Griffin performing dueling banjos
challan 19
That wasn't him beat boxing...
perdix 29
Did you share your cocaine with him (or what you call "allergy nasal spray")?
Ladisa 28
#19 - Had to scroll down one FML in the list to get it. Makes perfect sense now.
iiTzNeeNerz 26
It would have been even more epic if a third person had joined in by tapping the beat with a pen. LoL
Danielle7994 18
Lol that sort of reminds me of this story that my sister told me in her class. It was that song that goes: "MM BA DUM (MM BUH DUM) MM BA DUM (MM BA- BRRRRRRRRRAP!). Well...lol, one kid on one side of the room just randomly started that first part, then this other kid (LITERALLY across the room yelled BRRRRRRRRRRAP!) The process then repeated Lol. I was like, "Wow...you have such a weird class". Lol.
DocBastard 38
Let this be a lesson to you - only sing obscure songs when you think you're alone in the restroom. And for ****'s sake, NEVER rap. Ever.
perdix 29
#25, any art form that mocks fifty dollar T-shirts is OK in my book!
RedPillSucks 31
Sorry Doc, none less that the immortal Edgar Allan Poe commanded us to rap. While I nodded, nearly crapping, suddenly there came a tapping, As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my stall door. `'Tis some adjacent visitor,' I muttered, `rapping at my stall door - Only this, and nothing more.'
\ 28
One does not simply rap to himself.
RayearthNinja 10
this doesn't seem like an FML.