Today, I spent 2 hours making the perfect card for my dad for Father's Day. When I handed it to him, he smiled and said "Thank you" and then killed a fly with it. I found it in the trash a couple of hours later. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my dad found the Father's Day present that I spent at least ten hours preparing and decorating. I'd expected him to be extremely happy about this lovely gift. His only reaction was to ask if he could exchange it for something else. FML
Today, a wasp somehow got into my parents' house, so I went hunting for it with my dad. I found it and, after getting into position, took a strong swing at it with a fly swatter. Unfortunately, being very uncoordinated, I missed. You can figure out the rest. FML
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Today, I flew home from college to see my parents. Later I found the expensive painting and hand-made necklace I mailed to my mom for mother's day while taking out the trash. FML
Today, my Dad and I killed a cockroach with a large metal pole. It was the most bonding experience we have ever had. FML
Today, me and my dad's birthdays are both a week apart. For his birthday I'd given him a cute card with a dog on it that said happy birthday, and inside it had 200$. A week later, he gave me the same card, but it was empty. FML
Today, I asked a coworker what she'd bought her dad for father's day. She said that she got him some flowers, and I laughed because I thought it was a rather feminine gift for a man. I later found out that the flowers were for his grave. FML
Today, at lunch, a fly was buzzing around my food. I managed to kill the fly in my napkin in midair. I continued my lunch, pleased with my amazing ninja skills. When I was done with my lunch, I wiped my mouth with the napkin. I can still taste bug guts. Karma. FML
Today, I spent 3 hours making a birthday card for my boyfriend, delicately cutting each letter out of printed coloured paper. He used it as a coffee coaster. FML
Today, my son tried to swat a fly with a hammer. Our apartment walls are now littered with dents and holes. FML
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Top comments
89_Sparkly 7
that's so mean!!
YacL 15
I bet if it had a naked chick on it he wouldn't have thrown it away, mind you it'd probably be really awkward.
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Comments (175)
allthatremains25 0
aw! look on the brightside, atleast he got some use outta it.
KEEdollarsignHA 0
guess it's not the perfect card
life_lol 0
dumb ass cards are a no good.
kitten1323 19
Its dads like this that makes it easier for me to deal with the fact that my sperm donor of a father left after he cheated on my mom when I was 2
Alex213 0
maybe he knows your not his real kid
kitten1323 19
Oh I'm his real kid. Trust me, I look just like him
bh173 0
your father is a p r I c k.
ravenmarie1995 0
my dad didnt even read his card. he just opened it up and asked my sisters and i where the money was.
julialoves0521 0
thats sweat....
julialoves0521 0
shuda got him a fly swater at least he wudnt through it away.