Today, I snuck up on my girlfriend to give her a kiss. Only after I planted a big one did I realize it was not my girlfriend, or even a girl for that matter. FML
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Today, I was reassuring my girlfriend that I wasn't cheating on her because I was sneaking around. I'm actually just planning a surprise birthday party for her. During the reassuring, I accidentally called her by another girl's name. FML
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
Today, I went to the mall with my girlfriend to buy some new clothes, and I turned around to give her a quick kiss. My lips were half-way to "her" face when I saw instead the face of another lady. She slapped me. My girlfriend was standing next to me, very pissed off. FML
Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML
Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML
Today, I was walking out of class when I saw a girl enthusiastically run to her boyfriend, jump on him, and smother him with kisses. I thought to myself "I wish my girlfriend did that." When the girl jumped off and turned around I realized she did, just not to me. FML
Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I have an extra key. I snuck into his bed with sleep with him and noticed how soft his skin was. Turns out I had been feeling up the girl he was sleeping with and he was in the bathroom. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, I tried to prank my girlfriend. I said, “I saw you kissing another guy!” She apologized. FML
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Top comments
Chrispayne 4
Dude looks like a lady
Crazy_Toss3R 0
kinky
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Comments (267)
demetrius17 0
So I take it your girlfriend looks like a boy?
TehLazyBoy 0
"Today a random guy kissed me thinking I was his girlfriend. I'm a guy. FML."
999pun999 0
How did it feel?
xZianIx209 6
so which one are u? u seem to be changing ur mind...
Mberry 0
is this your way of coming out?
jlperry31 10
hot.
Microbus_fml 0
Sounds like your girlfriend's a sasquatch!
skyhawkvd 0
your girl must be manly
CookieMargoulis 0
I hope your girlfriend doesn't read this and find out you thought she was a MAN
kitsune3 20
I'm amazed that so many people are assuming the op's girlfriend is manly. Who's to say the guy he accidentally kissed wasn't feminine looking? Think a little, people.