Today, I slipped on the ice in front of my apartment, spraining my ankle and cracking a rib. While I laid on the ground immediately after, my neighbor chewed me out for saying "shit" in front of her 4-year-old on my way down. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was home alone in my apartment. I tripped over my dresser and fell and sprained my ankle. As I was laying there in agonizing pain, my downstairs neighbor shouted at me to shut up. FML
Today, while walking to work, I sneezed so violently that I slipped on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard, badly spraining my shoulder. I lay there in agony as a pair of bystanders just stood there, laughing their asses off. FML
Today, I slipped and fell on the ice while attending a community event for work. A man came to help me up, and I farted really loudly. FML
Today, I slipped on my icy front porch, fell back, and hit my head on the step. I tried to get up, but lost my balance and fell halfway into the bush next to the steps. I then looked up to see my very hot, British, ex-Special Forces next door neighbor laughing so hard he dropped his snow shovel. FML
Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML
Today, I tripped over a "Caution: Slippery When Wet" floor sign and sprained my ankle. FML
Today, I broke my toe and screamed, "Fuck!" My mom heard and yelled at me for swearing, while I laid on the floor in pain. FML
Today, after slipping on my stairs and spraining my ankle, I got a brace and crutches at urgent care. When I went to get into my car, my crutch slipped on some paper and I fell. I crawled back into urgent care, only to learn that my sprained ankle is now broken in 2 places. FML
Today, I walked across my kitchen to go get my mom a blanket after she shoveled snow. I slipped and caught the kitchen chair with my side, landed on the floor and almost fracturing my knee cap. She then told me she wasn't cold. FML
Today, I walked to the end of my driveway to pick up the newspaper. I read the front page that was talking about people who have been getting hurt from slipping on ice. Laughing about that thought and walking up my driveway, I slipped. FML
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Top comments
adelaide_evening 0
You should've killed two birds with one stone and told her to take her bitching elsewhere.
PureGold 0
WOW, some people just don't get it. There are some things you just need to let go. There are no words to adequately describe people like your neighbor. Socially retarded, snobbish, idiotic, self-absorbed assholes, maybe, but so much worse...
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Comments (93)
ThorsSon 0
#5 - does "poped her in the face" mean to hit her in the face with the leader of the Catholic church?
khaldun 0
Bahahaha.... I'm going to use that from now on. "Shut the hell up, son, before I pope you in the face!"
bubs_AKA_vermin 0
you fell down icy stairs and all your neighbor can do is get you in trouble for swearing in front of a 4-year-old kid? WTF?!? needs a sharp slap to the face via rusty shovel.
pennies83 0
Personally, I would've said to her "Hey douchebag! I just ******* fell. What the **** do you expect? SHIT!" I would've loved to have seen her facial expression after you said that to her.
ZyQo 0
i would just say. "Hey ****! go **** yourself! i just fell and got hurt. take your bitching elsewhere."
Mit_Liv09 0
Screw her and her daughter, I hope they both fall and get hurt. Then you can say "Hey Fcuk face, isn't karma a Btich"?
eat_it 0
Yah F that. The kid is going to learn that word sooner or later..
jrkwaddd 0
Today, someone fell down the stairs cracking his ribs and breaking his ankle and said "shit" in front of me. My mommy chewed his balls and said "stop ******' cussin' up in here" in front of my little dick. I'm gay and I'm 4. FML
derschadenfreude 5
60, WIN
knitbitch 0
What a bitch. It's not like you called her kid a ******* ass-**** or anything bad like that. Cracked ribs? I'd be screaming "FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKITTY!" at the top of my lungs, you said, "Shit!" and got chewed out? Email her the link for this FML and the comments so she can see what a giant inconsiderate arrogant "holier-than-thou" motherfucking bitch she really is! @#60: lmao!
Chris_passion 0
1. did your naughbor say sorry after she/he relized what happend 2. if not go jump that asshole