Today, I saw my mom changing the expiry date on milk. She genuinely thought this would make the milk sour later. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my mother decided to inform me that she doesn't believe canned food can have an expiry date and that the food is still okay to eat years after the 'supposed' expiry date. She's probably been cooking my dinner with expired food for over 17 years. FML
Today, I'm taking care of my 12-year-old daughter because my ex-wife thought she could cure our daughter's lactose intolerance by sneaking milk into her soy breakfast. The milk had expired. FML
Today, I really wanted something to drink. I looked in the fridge, and found some of my grandma's soy milk. I took a swig, and instead of tasting soy, I tasted something rotten. Turns out my grandma knows I drink her soy milk, so she swapped it with expired chicken broth. FML
Today, I was pouring milk into my coffee and, as it plooped into my mug, I noticed the expiration date on the jug passed two weeks ago. Nobody here drinks milk very often and I ran out of creamer, so I've been unknowingly drinking my coffee with curdled milk for the past three days. FML
Today, I discovered why the milk in my house has a funny, sweet taste. My family has been pouring the leftover milk from their cereal back into the carton. FML
Today, I learned that instead of discarding expired products at my work, we change the label to make them 'expire' later. FML
Today, I cleaned out the fridge for my mother. I didn't throw out a single thing that was less than a month past its expiration. Instead of thanks, she complained about everything that I threw away being still good, including a tub of butter that had been expired for two years. FML
Today, I found out my mom put breast milk in my cereal until I was 7 years old. FML
Today, my roommate thought that "sour milk" would taste like sour candy. She left a jug of milk out for two days, then took a huge gulp, vomited everywhere, and dropped the jug. Now the kitchen stinks of rotten dairy. FML
Today, while my mom was out, my family agreed upon the assumption that she has a "shopping problem." I argued against it for quite a while, until she pulled up minutes later with a what seemed like a life-time supply of canned condensed milk. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Poopolicious 5
Change her birth date... She"ll age slower =}
boating_guy 33
Really? Wanting someone's mom dead is pretty harsh...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (181)
Liana23music 0
No. My dad does that. He pours other milk in there so he doesn't have to buy another one at the store.
pbonham 22
That doesn't make sense... Where does the other milk come from?
Marcella1016 32
Please allow me to inject another perspective into this FML: Milk usually lasts a few days after the expiration date. Just smell it before you drink it and if it's not sour it's fine to drink. Honestly I don't think your mom is that stupid. She probably just changed the date to make sure you would still drink it as long as it was still good, but wouldn't throw it out because it "expired." It doesn't magically go sour when the clock strikes 12 on the day on the carton :)
ColdplaySucks 18
Milk tastes weird when it starts to get sour, but when it's completely bad, then it'll get you pretty sick.
lfrye 6
The question is how long has she tried this?
sunflower3121 2
she was trolling
happle 21
But it goes great with Chunky Puffs...
hecallsmedarlin 7
Hoping she doesn't work at a grocery store! (or a milk factory)...& if so I can tell you what the **** I am staying away from.
thiscrazything 1
Milk factory?
hecallsmedarlin 7
Ya...a factory...where milk is made.. There is such a thing, how to you expect they get them in jugs and put dates on the them? One by one? Lol!
hecallsmedarlin 7
Oh.. & you know, once that is done they fit as many as they can in a handy dandy pull wagon to distribute them to the billions of different stores that sell milk ;)
WiderWille 11
Wait, so you are saying that milk doesn't grow in supermarkets? My whole life was a lie!
koolkat27 13
I worked in McDonalds during summer and I have to call bs on your comment.
thiscrazything 1
Tell her to change the balance in her checking account by adding a zero, then let her buy you something real nice with all that extra money she just created.
broim13calm_down 8
Oh it doesn't? My mistake