Embarrassing, ACAB, Parents and Cops: Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you... - FML

By Anonymous - 03/06/2011 01:07 - United States

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 337

You deserved it 3 533

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Get back here!

By Anonymous - 12/02/2010 07:51 - Canada

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me!" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 150

You deserved it 2 751

By dani911 - 15/07/2009 01:16 - United States

Today, I noticed a car following me all the way to my house. It was dark so I got really nervous and called the police. The person got out of the car. It was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 710

You deserved it 37 359

Road rage

By howannoying - 16/02/2013 06:24 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage". When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 311

You deserved it 3 905

By drivingmecrazy - 13/12/2016 16:54 - United States - Stamford

Today, my mom once again yelled at me for "driving erratically". She texts while driving 70 miles per hour on the highway, but apparently driving through a yellow light is "reckless". FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 268

You deserved it 704

By driverboy - 31/12/2014 08:08 - United States

Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 903

You deserved it 4 873

By Anonymous - 06/02/2014 23:07 - United States - San Ramon

Today, my mother-in-law tried to "accidentally" run me over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 369

You deserved it 4 207

By tramplily - 17/11/2011 05:43 - United States

Today, I was driving home and got a phone call from my mom. She called to tell me that there was a cop at the bottom of our hill, and to be careful. I got a ticket for talking on my cell phone while driving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 625

You deserved it 30 505

By Anonymous - 31/10/2011 04:12 - United States

Today, while in the car with my mom, she gave me a lecture about how bad of a driver I am. During that process she ran a red light and hit a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 259

You deserved it 2 649

By Anonymous - 22/12/2010 22:23 - United States

Today, my mother took a bunch of sleeping pills, then went driving. I followed her and dialed 911. Now she thinks that I was "trying to get her arrested," and she refuses to talk to me ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 145

You deserved it 4 853

By shewantsmedead - 26/01/2017 18:00

Today, I ran into my mother-in-law, who I absolutely can't stand, with my car at 5 mph by accident. She jumped out in front of me after a particularly nasty argument, but my husband won't believe me and neither will the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 064

You deserved it 569

Next

Top comments

RugbyKid 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:19

**** you alcoholics I can arrest you whenever I want

roseydot 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:25

Your mom kicks ass.

Comments

TylerGowen 0

Friday 3 June 2011 17:18

haha that's for sure a boss

bigred7070 0

Friday 3 June 2011 17:22

your moms a gangster

sexylicious 4

Friday 3 June 2011 18:18

omg I love your mom... she sounds awesome!

Poliahputz 0

Friday 3 June 2011 18:37

Your mom is a party animal, two thumbs up!

XxsikklexX 3

Friday 3 June 2011 18:37

this is too outlandish to be true.

ghashlycrumbs 8

Friday 3 June 2011 19:50

I don't see the problem here. Your mother is awesome, quit your bitching and join her.

Brooke19 0

Friday 3 June 2011 20:16

bahahahahaha. thats cracked me up. your mom kicks ass. haha

lifeisabitchandy 2

Friday 3 June 2011 20:25

I actually laughed out loud on this one. I am sorry for OP but what a great story

btstig 11

Friday 3 June 2011 20:46

56 wins haha that's awesome. Sorry reality but everyone has shit they have to go thru count your blessings. Your still breathing.

DoubleL4567 0

Friday 3 June 2011 21:11

your mom is awesome ! xD

2
3
4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Work Management Love Jealousy Mental health Relationship advice Relatable Miscellaneous Friends Awkward Health Healthy Lifestyle Food Ironic Money Birthday Family Gifts Mother in law Public freakouts Education Parents Pranks Students Exams Weird Argument AITA Fear Insects

The Top

Today, I was at a big meeting at work. The CEO was reaming the hell out of us for our recent poor profits, when I accidentally let rip a vile fart. I was then subjected to a 10 minute tirade of abuse for "trying to be a funny man", and told that whatever small chance I had for a promotion is now gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 450

You deserved it 6 068

Today, I fell asleep in the car on a 10+ hour trip with my family as soon as we got on the highway. When I woke up an hour later, I realized I'd had a wet dream. I had to sit next to my grandma with semen all over my thighs and boxers for the rest of the trip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 142

You deserved it 11 901

The Top

Today, I had to catch a coach to London at 4 in the morning. I was late so I had to take any free seat, so sat down next to a seemingly sweet old man. Within ten minutes, the sweet old man was trying to kiss me and trying to pull me on top of him. Nobody said anything. The journey was 4 hours long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 379

You deserved it 3 776

Today, my mother called me "wasteful" because I left the refrigerator door open and that "electricity money doesn’t grow on trees." This is the same person who lets my little sister have her light on all night, because she’s scared of the dark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 380

You deserved it 1 374

Today, I had a stomach bug, but despite it I swallowed a mouthful of habanero sauce on a dare. I ended up projectile vomiting on a wall outside, lost my sense of balance and fell over on the sidewalk, almost blacked out from the tightness in my chest, and had to refuse an ambulance that somebody had called. All for $5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 1 240

Today, I offered to let my niece and brother stay at my apartment, as my brother was going through a rough divorce and had lost his job. After coming home from work, I found my niece had snapped all of my pencils and had ruined over ten years worth of artwork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 620

You deserved it 335

Today, I was training a new volunteer at a clothing donation center. While explaining how to sort donations, I reached into a garbage bag full of clothes and something on my hand caught my eye. It was a bed bug. The bag was full of them and they sought refuge up my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 964

You deserved it 272

Today, I realised how socially inept I am, when I muttered an apology to my laptop after I noticed I hadn't plugged its charger in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 959

You deserved it 6 608