Today, I saw a spider in my bathtub, so instead of killing it, i decided to bring my dog inside the bathroom to kill the spider for me. Turns out that the spider was a black widow, and my dog was bit. The dog killed the spider. The spider killed my dog. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I learned that my big, tough, strong dog is terrified of spiders when he jumped, knocked over a table, and then peed on the spider to drown it. FML
Today, I tried to have a relaxing soak in the tub. The giant wolf spider that was already in the tub didn't like me trying to set it free outside. It ran right across my feet and back into my house when I dumped it out of a cup outside. I screamed like a little girl. FML
Today, I saw a huge wolf spider in my room. It ran off and hid before I could kill it, but after two hours looking for it then giving up, I finally found it, with my foot, as I put on my shoes. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Noped out of there
Today, we found a tarantula type spider in our shed so big it could only have been someone’s escaped pet. This thing was so big, even my husband said, "NOPE!" In the end, we used our neighbour's crossbow to kill, it because I think it grew that big by eating dogs and small horses. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Act of kindness
Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML
A job well done.
Today, I asked my husband to deal with the very large spider in our kitchen. Rather than a newspaper or a slipper, he went after it with an aerosol can and a lighter. The spider is now dead, but so are the wall and cupboards in my kitchen. FML
Monster in my bathroom
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
Top comments
squeezebox 0
Oiii, that's so terrible!! I'm sorry to hear that. ):
vicious_ 0
Wow. This is why you run water when the spider is in the bathtub. Poor dog.
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Comments (220)
Monty_Python 0
Poor dog. OP is a ******* idiot.
Victoria2103 0
Wow. Just wow. For all those people saying "Oh, she didn't know what it looks like" or "If she's afraid of spiders, then it makes sense the dog would kill it for her": I'm SEVERELY arachnophobic, and I have never done that to my dog. Know why? Because I'm not a moron. You were responsible for that animal. And how was HE supposed to know it was a black widow? He's just a dog. You, on the other hand, were (presumably) endowed with basic reasoning skills. Nature has a way of making poisonous things obvious to us, i.e. rattlesnakes, neon blue tree frogs, Oh! AND freakily shaped spiders with huge asses and bright red on them. God, I hope you never become a mother. You'd probably try to get your infant to save you from a bear or something.
depresedandbroke 0
wht does OP stand 4?
mikeyellenlee 0
You ******* moron. I hope a spider crawls into your throat and gags you in your sleep. You deserve to be put away for animal cruelty.
ddrfunkmaster 0
#93 word
yourtinystar 0
@ #93: YOU JUST MADE MY WHOLE LIFE COMPLETE! @ # 94: Original Poster
lolo527 0
Wow...that poor dog. I hope someone steps in the next time you try to adopt an animal and keeps you from ever getting a pet again because you are a freaking idiot
depresedandbroke 0
wht does original poster mean?srry im new 2 fml
unclejemima17 0
poor doggy :[
yourtinystar 0
@ #99: It's the person that posted the FML.