Today, I saw a cute girl working register at my regular coffee shop and politely asked the her for her number. I was brutally rejected. A few minutes later, a douchebag with a popped collar approached her with a cheesy pickup line and left with not only her number, but a free frappe. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I saw a cute girl at a bar and decided to go and chat her up. After charming her with my usual crap for a while, I told her she was really pretty, and asked for her number. She replied, "You asshole, I met you here a year ago and gave you my number, and you never called me." FML
Today, I learned that just because the cute barista at the train station smiles, waves at me each time I arrive, and develops small talk, probably means she's trying to sell me pastries. The smile she had when I asked for her number, and the way she said, "Nah" still haunts me. FML
Today, while working as a cashier, I was flirting with this cute girl. When I asked her if she had her store card she said, "No", paused, then said "Can I give you my number?" I said, "Sure, that would be awesome, do you want mine?" She said no. I didn't know I could just enter the card number. FML
Today, I flirted with the cashier at the local bagel joint. I complimented her unique blue hair and got her number. Later on that evening, she served my girlfriend and me our food at a different restaurant. FML
Today, I went to a coffee shop with my friend. The guy rang her up and said it was only a dollar as he winked at her $10 purchase. Then he rang me up at completely full price. She got his number and I got to be the ugly friend once again. FML
Today, I was working at the mall as the girl that stands around giving out samples of the foods. This guy came up to me and we were flirting for at least 30 minutes. With the tray in one hand, I gave him my cell to put his number in it. He ran away with my phone. FML
Today, I saw a beautiful girl at the bar. I attempted to be friendly and hit her up for a chat. She called me a “creep” and told me to get lost. A few moments later, another guy does the exact same thing I did and she smiled and kept flirting. FML
Today, while out for lunch, a guy approached me and asked for my number. I politely declined. To my dismay, he dropped to his knees, grabbed his head, and started moaning about how nobody ever gives him a chance. I felt the accusing stares. FML
Today, a cute girl I know in passing approached me very nervously and blushing like mad. She gave me a note with a number on it, said to call her, then ran away. When I called the number later, it was one of those rejection hotlines. What the hell? FML
Today, I felt fairly depressed about being single for the holidays during work. This cute girl came to my register asking about our sales ad. After telling her we had no copies, she asked for my number. I shouted: "Finally, someone wants to go out with me." She wanted the store's number to call. FML
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Top comments
RatRodInk 0
Everyone knows you gotta pop your collar if your a pimp
Inspired22 11
Don't give up. The worthwhile girls don't go for the popped-collar type anyway.
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Comments (347)
sweet_candy_ 17
Awww don't feel bad maybe she has a thing for bad boys.
SolemnlyLove 7
dont all young women have a thing for bad boys?
VeganVampyre 27
No. I don't. =)
churchic 5
Since when do bad boys wear popped collars? I must have missed that memo
Quest_ 13
Wow dude, FYL. You were clearly entitled to a date with that girl because you were polite to her. Isn't it hard, being sooo nice to girls all the time, but they won't even have sex with you?
slitherbomb 0
Wtf are you talking about idiot? I was being completely sarcastic, asshole. You failed.
Quest_ 13
Wow man, I think someone's overdue for a wank.
meischuck 0
Sing this to her, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-h0IpjnByfs
tundraman07 0
consider yourself lucky
thecovert 7
You're life is over. Pills to the left, gun to the right, bridge straight ahead. Or just ignore the *****.
Maevora06 2
I blame Jersey Shore.
drwcomics 1
A girl into guys like that aren't worth your time. Seriously. Forget her, and be thankful you don't have to put up with her.
Car_crashhearts 1
Well OP I want to be sympathetic, but then again I don't know who you are. Maybe you are one of those creepy guys that hit on girls that you are obviously way too old for. Perhaps the "douchebag" is someone she's seen around and closer to her age? Maybe you could even be that one creepy regular at my coffee shop who IS obviously way too old to be hitting on the cashiers there and steal our coffee and you're just mad because this dude didn't get yelled for his free frappe. Then again she could also just be bitch. It could go either way :)
robc32ca 4
Did he speak clearly and with proper grammar? Was he a "douche bag" only because he got the number and you didn't?
foxmatrix15 8
Turns out the whole shyness geek move doesn't work dude. You need to grow balls and confidence and act like the girl is ur forth option to pick up. It helps 50% if ur good-looking too so shave ur body hair and hit the gym.