Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my dad forgot it's my birthday. When I told him about it, he accused me of lying and threatened to ground me for a week. FML
Today, after my mom picked me up from the mall, she asked me what was in my bag from Gap. I wouldn't tell her, and she ended up grounding me. It was her Mother's Day present. FML
Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML
Today, I'm mad at my dad for forgetting it's my birthday. He's mad at me for not reminding him. FML
Today, I got grounded because I didn't go to my dog's birthday party. FML
Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML
Today, I was a little grumpy. I tried my best to not take it out on other people, but then I encountered that ONE person who doesn't realize that sometimes people are just in a bad mood, and they proceed to give you a hard time over nothing. That person was my mom. And then later my dad. Now I'm grounded. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend, since we weren't getting along. When I got home, I remembered that today is his birthday. Him and all our friends now think I'm a total bitch. FML
Today, I've been so stressed out that I forgot my own birthday. I only remembered when my mom talked to me to let me know she wasn't planning on doing anything for it. FML
Today, rather than get me a birthday present, my boyfriend just got angry that I got gifts from other people. Apparently, it "made him feel guilty." FML
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Top comments
gabfoundnemo 5
Admitting it is the first step. To rehab you go.
Vball6 19
Bitch.
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Comments (311)
cawoods 1
Whata loser
masterofdouchery 1
I really hope "my mom grounded me for not telling her what I got her for her birthday. FML" shows up soon
Dev_L667 0
i hope he returned your gift and spent the money on himself.
dreadedguardian 5
Lol...silly bitch.
shamonie22 9
At least you can admit that you're a bitch. A lot of people are bitches and don't even know it or won't admit it.
ianderson818 4
Wow! You are a bitch!
simonepedretti 7
Wtf thts horrible
beclaurela 18
You are a bitch. Wonder what your son thinks of you because he has to deal with you on a daily basis.
santel_fml 8
Massive bitch
Roo79 1
I hope this child has a dad around that's not an ass to balance out his veiw on life or he'll get end up on a bell tower with a rifle! Selfish cow!