Today, I realised half my underpants were missing. In related news, my slob of a housemate hasn't washed hers in several weeks, and has been stealing mine. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I noticed some of my things in my slob of a roommate's piles of clothes. I found six pairs of my underwear that had gone missing. Turns out she hasn't done laundry recently so my underwear drawer was her own personal Victoria's Secret. I hadn't even worn a pair yet. All six were stained. FML
Today, I found out that my flatmate wears my underwear. FML
Today, and for weeks now, I was sure my underwear was going missing. I found out why. My husband's brother has been stealing them whenever he visits, presumably to masturbate with. I literally caught him shoving an unwashed pair into his pocket he'd stolen from my laundry pile. Creep. FML
Today, I was washing some clothes in the laundry room at my apartment complex. I went back an hour later, passed my neighbor on the way in, and moved my clothes to the dryer. I just brought them back from the dryer, and all my underwear are missing. FML
Today, someone broke into my house and stole all of my underwear. FML
Today, I moved back into my room, which I'd sublet for a few months. The subtenant never paid any rent and is gone, but she did leave me something: my own underwear on the floor, which she apparently liked to wear, but didn't seem to like to wash. FML
Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML
Today, I went to pick up my laundry from the communal machines in my apartment building. When I got there, all my clothes were neatly folded on top of the dryer. I was impressed, until I realized half of the pile wasn’t mine. I'd been carrying someone else’s underwear up to my apartment. FML
Today, I was house-sitting for some friends of my grandparents while they are out of town. While I was in the shower, the dog decided to take my dirty underwear and run. There is now a pair of lacy, black underwear hidden somewhere this giant house, and they return tomorrow. FML
Today, I came home and saw my roommate had taken out the garbage for the first time in the three years we have lived in the same house. Unfortunately, the bag of laundry I had by the door was taken out with it as well. FML
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Top comments
TrinityisLife 22
Commando! Feel the breeze! In related news, that's disturbing what your housemate is doing........
whiteboy896 9
whata lazy ****
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Comments (90)
MysteryGuest214 10
A lock on your bedroom door is in order ASAP.
MitchellB1026 8
When I read this first I thought you mean that you were missing half of the underpants you were wearing lol.
babeababe 16
Who does that? Seriously. Where do you find these people? Sorry OP, looks like you need a new roommate. Unless you wanna keep that creeper around.
kee_breezy32 34
Ew . lol time to buy some more !
OverBlossomed 22
Lessons from FML: Don't trust your partner, don't trust your friends, don't trust your family, don't trust your roommate, don't trust ANYONE. Good lessons.
A100893 30
Itching powder will do wonders for that problem if you're the passive aggressive type.
worldclassrager 41
Nice name... Anyway...well it looks like your hiding them from your roommate until they do their laundry or in the case of they they might be going commando for awhile...either or she needs to pull her own weight...
kaduzy 12
That's incredibly gross, but YDI because you sound like a jackass too. You can't get AIDS from sharing underpants with someone, especially if you wash them before putting them back on yourself -- which presumably, you would do.
Annihilation666 1
When I read this, I pictured you wearing half a pair of underpants.
GiraffeAquarium 7
You better hide your panties, hide your toothbrush, because they're stealing everything up in here!