Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to my disabled mother screaming for me. Fearing the worst, I hopped out of bed only to find that she was yelling because her cat had brought a field mouse inside as a gift. The problem? It was still alive. I had to get it from him and throw it outside. FML
Today, my daughter, who can pick up spiders and even snakes without flinching, screamed at the top of her lungs because she saw a mouse. Um, what? FML
Today, I woke up to what sounded like twigs snapping. Turns out it was the skull of a live mouse being crushed in my cat's jaws. FML
Today, I painted my daughter's bedroom. When I wasn't paying attention, the cat walked through the paint tray. There are now Barney purple paw prints all over the house. FML
Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunderstorm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML
Today, around 2:00 a.m. I had just sat down on my couch when I noticed one of my cats poking at what appeared to be a toy. I attempted to pick it up to play with the cat when it started to move like a mouse. I squealed like a girl and woke up my wife upstairs. I'm a 26-year-old man. FML
Today, my cat started screaming nonstop outside my bedroom. She's never done this since she was last in heat (she's 7 1/2 years old), so I was worried. I opened the door to find that she had "killed' a mouse (a fake one, formerly attached to her cat tree) and was very proud of herself. That's cute, but… really? FML
Today, my 2-year-old cat finally decided to start catching mice. Like any other cat would, she left it for me to find. I found it in the middle of the night, as my bare foot rolled its guts out of its ass. FML
Today, while spring cleaning, my cat came into the kitchen with a live mouse in her mouth. She looked me dead in the eyes and dropped the mouse, which then ran into my bedroom. It's been 4 hours and I still can't find it. Where's the cat? Chilling like nothing happened. FML
Today, I was cleaning my room when I found a nice surprise from my cat. While I was on vacation, she killed a mouse. By the time I found it, there were maggots crawling in my carpet. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Jordanln97 9
Oh my god
cristy91 33
In every house cat, there is a tiger waiting.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (114)
leahmae88 7
Good kitty
nails4life 2
Your cat has her own bedroom?
Why_Not31 12
Haha! I remember mom telling us kids that the cats used to put live mice and rabbits in our cribs and play-places, and they'd kill them right in front of us at first, then they just tried to wait for us to do the same, as if we were their kittens. That conversation got awkward real fast when dad piped in to say that I actually killed one of the injured mice with my baby teeth when I was one year old. Mom told him he could've left that bit out, and my siblings shunned me as a "mouse-killer" for the rest of the day. Maybe your cat was trying to teach the baby to kill/hunt.
Jebitesevsi 11
That's adorable!
Jebitesevsi 11
Good kitty! The OP would be singing a different dirge, if she found mouse poop in her daughter's crib.
JBChristian 47
As a new father, I approve of the cat and recommend a promotion and raise. I would rather have a wall painted in mouse blood than a mouse cuddling with my child.
Hgbest11 6
oh........ I um....... oh