Geek: TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK.... - FML

Nearly

28/09/2021 01:05

Today, I found out my dog of 11 years has very severe cancer. Her spleen, which has swollen to the size of a football, had a small rupture a day ago and would fatally within a week, we'll be putting her down tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44

You deserved it 3

27/09/2021 06:27

Today, I have to get up and go to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55

You deserved it 100

Spicy

Spicy

Unfriended

By thethrowawayplace - 15/10/2021 17:00

Spicy

Today, my friend was watching a black guy getting yelled at by the cops on TV. He then decided to yell, "Wow, ni***** really don't know how to behave!" When I didn't react, he yelled it over and over, until I slunk into my room. He knows I'm part black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 564

You deserved it 92

Grind mindset

By MyStomachHurts - 15/10/2021 05:00

Spicy

Today, my boss wrote me up for taking too many bathroom breaks. I tried calling in sick with a bad case of indigestion, but he told me to just power through it because, "it can't possibly be that bad." I have been in severe, persistent discomfort the whole damn day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 572

You deserved it 40

21/03/2011 17:32

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 561

You deserved it 34 166

Batman

You tried

Broke

First day at work

By dumbass724 - 13/01/2020 14:00

Today, it was my first day of work, and I was wondering why everyone was staring and laughing at me. I looked down and I realized that the fly on my jeans was open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 888

You deserved it 449

16/12/2010 04:08

Today, I went with my sister to her company Christmas party. They had a gift raffle, my number was called and I won $25 for a local restaurant. A few moments later, the manager came over and said, "You don't work here? You can't have that" and took it from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 437

You deserved it 7 115

08/02/2011 16:57

Today, I wanted to propose to my girlfriend, so I bought M and M's which I had customized with the words "Will you marry me?" on them. She ate them all without reading them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 791

You deserved it 15 300

RIP Beard

By captain patch beard - 03/10/2019 18:01

Spicy

Today, I met a girl at a bar, we had a few drinks and really hit it off. We headed back to my place to get a little action. As she was riding me, she got rougher and rougher until she reached down and yanked a patch of hair right out of my beard. I yelped in pain and didn’t even finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 907

You deserved it 385

10/12/2008 11:09

Today, and for the third time this week, my bank manager called me to tell me that my account is still overdrawn. He doesn't seem to understand that my wages always get paid at the end of the month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 962

You deserved it 5 102

17/02/2016 19:17

Today, I gave a talk in my management class about creating effective presentations and holding people's attention. Go figure, pretty much nobody paid any attention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 117

You deserved it 3 308

18/07/2014 23:06

Today, my mom told me my relationship is a joke, because teenagers don't understand the meaning of relationships and commitment. I couldn't help but remind her how she's divorced three separate men to date. She hit me over the head so hard that snot flew out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 816

You deserved it 11 238

02/12/2012 18:55

Spicy

Today, my parents heard from my sister that I'd recently lost my virginity to my girlfriend. I've never been bitched out so viciously in my life, and yet my sister, whom everyone knows has had numerous casual sexual partners this year, is treated like a princess 24/7. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 322

You deserved it 2 536

19/08/2009 15:03

Today, I flew 8 hours to visit my boyfriend. When I arrived at the airport, and he started taking long to show up, I checked my email to see the info. I hit the junk mail by accident and found his last 10 emails in there. He had broken up with me a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 549

You deserved it 16 214

17/03/2019 18:00

Today I took my dogs to the off leash dog park as usual. Today some dick decided to feed my pup alcohol while I was cleaning up after my other dog. Now my pup is sick and the vet is worried he may not survive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 332

You deserved it 210

19/05/2013 17:35

Today, I reconnected with my best friend from childhood, and after a tearful confession, found out that for most of my engagement to my husband, she was repeatedly connecting with his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 670

You deserved it 3 124

Jaywalking?

By Anonymous - 03/07/2021 16:01

Today, while walking on the sidewalk, I was hit by a daycare van. After going to the police to complain, I was given a ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 842

You deserved it 75

16/09/2010 05:13

Spicy

Today, I crawled into bed naked, wanting to get some and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass and said 'oh' then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 627

You deserved it 6 005

20/01/2010 05:27

Today, I was riding my dorm elevator from the 5th floor to the 1st by myself. Since the elevator is really slow, I pulled my pants and underwear down just for kicks. Just then, the door opened to let a girl on at the 4th floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 683

You deserved it 85 702

20/07/2010 19:01

Today, I helped my fiancé pack up and head to Texas for a business trip. I'm not only going to miss him, but I'll also miss my car keys that I accidentally left in his car. I drive for a living. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 527

You deserved it 15 505

10/05/2017 00:10

Today, I got written up with a final warning because I ''drink alcoholic beverages'' at work. I was drinking Root Beer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 175

You deserved it 336

28/03/2009 14:14

Today, I was at work at a preschool. I was sitting outside with the kids and was getting bored so I started singing. One of the little girls runs up and puts her hand over my mouth and tells me to stop. I'm in a select chorus at my highschool and plan to major in choral studies in college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 802

You deserved it 11 299

17/10/2015 04:00

Today, I found out that my fiancé's sister, who only got engaged a couple of months ago, is getting married before us. I wouldn't have a problem with this if she wasn't planning her wedding to be exactly like ours will be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 643

You deserved it 1 874

Scammed

By FMLdude - 18/08/2013 23:23

Today, I accidentally hit an elderly man while driving. The police came, and five minutes later I was told that he confessed to walking in the middle of the road to get hit and claim compensation. He was fine, but I still got charged for hitting a pedestrian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 191

You deserved it 4 960

07/08/2009 09:18

Today, I finished a ballet class with a group of seven-and-unders. Afterwards, a new student's mother came up to me and thanked me, saying she was glad that her daughter had a "role model with a, ahem, fuller figure" and "not to worry about my weight." I have never thought I was fat before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 270

You deserved it 3 847

Chainsaw

By Anonymous - 21/08/2021 07:01

Today, after a very poor night's sleep, I've had to stay awake and do housework while my husband, who slept like a baby last night, keeps on sleeping because he "didn't sleep well." He was snoring all night long, the reason I didn't sleep well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 842

You deserved it 103

07/04/2012 19:12

Today, I cleaned my computer screen for the first time in ages. When I turned it on a few hours later, I spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to figure out why the brightness was suddenly so painfully high. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 607

You deserved it 27 498

15/01/2017 10:00

Spicy

Today, I accidentally uploaded a video of me pleasing myself to my Snapchat story. Five people saw it before I could take it down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 950

You deserved it 14 919

Time for the ER

By littl3storm - 24/04/2020 23:00

Today, my brace broke and due to Covid-19, I can't get it fixed for another month and a half. Four brackets have come off, the wire is sinking into my gum, giving me tooth and jaw pain. I can't eat and I'm spending excessive amounts of money on pain relief. The cause of all this? A cheese pasty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 741

You deserved it 232

08/08/2016 19:14

Today, a woman threatened to stab my eyes out because I wouldn't let her into the shop I closed and locked up half an hour ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 797

You deserved it 798

12/08/2018 06:00

Today, a friend texted me to get a ticket and go to the theme park with her tomorrow. I bought a ticket and didn't hear from her until 5 hrs later to say she was sorry, but she doesn't think she'll be going. It was $65 and non refundable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 779

You deserved it 295

10/02/2011 05:31

Today, to prevent a fistfight at work, I had to mediate a contested debate between two coworkers on what was evidently a very touchy subject: Which is better, the orange creamsicle or the ice cream sandwich? I was the only one to get in trouble for wasting company time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 634

You deserved it 4 643

24/01/2010 05:01

Today, I got a call from the girl I'd really like to date to meet up for drinks. Excited, I walked out my front door, slipped on a patch of ice, and dislocated my shoulder. She won't go out on a date with me now because I "ditched her". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 647

You deserved it 2 839

25/05/2011 20:33

Spicy

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from my biological father, who I have never met in my life. As I was scrolling through his hobbies and interests, I saw "Drinking," "Black women with big asses," and "Getting laid, lol." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 089

You deserved it 3 958

16/10/2017 01:30

Today, my 1-year-old son walked up to me with a disgusted look on his face. I could tell he had something in his mouth so I pulled it out. He'd been sucking on a piece of cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 801

You deserved it 446

01/07/2011 23:22

Spicy

Today, I had to make a deal with my 22 year old fiancé. What was the deal? If he put deodorant on, he could squeeze my boob for as long as he liked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 283

You deserved it 10 884

04/11/2009 05:15

Today, I got a phone call from my dad that I haven't heard from in months. I didn't answer, but it left me an accidental voicemail saying "Oh s***, I didn't mean to call her!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 478

You deserved it 2 577

01/01/2012 08:31

Today, I told my mom I was going to a New Year's party. She told me to be back by midnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 933

You deserved it 3 359

Mind-boggling logistics

By Anika - 23/06/2021 18:00

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. He married someone, and got another girl pregnant. We were together for 8 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 023

You deserved it 97

25/09/2013 10:37

Today, I realised I sweat so much that I won't be able to go without sticking super pads with wings to my shirt underarms everyday. It makes supermarket trips interesting. Especially as a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 181

You deserved it 3 883

29/03/2012 18:29

Today, my house caught on fire. The firefighters said that it was caused by a lit cigarette on the carpet. I don't smoke, but apparently my 13 year-old son does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 365

You deserved it 3 914

16/03/2010 18:35

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend since I believed him to be cheating on me with another woman, something he adamantly denied. I went to his house to get all my stuff back. After I left, I discovered a silk thong that definitely did not belong to me, in amongst my clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 394

You deserved it 4 646

04/09/2010 14:08

Today, my boyfriend proposed. The ring just had a piece of graphite on it. My boyfriend argued that since graphite and diamonds are both just forms of carbon, it is the same thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 645

You deserved it 14 277

23/08/2009 02:41

Today, I spilled my heart out to a guy by showing him one of my poetry journals. He read through it and said, "Wow, I feel sorry for the guy you wrote about." The poems were all about how I loved him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 123

You deserved it 7 956

18/03/2012 11:06

Today, I got a migraine. I work in an arcade with lots of bright lights, loud noises and screaming children. I was stuck in there for 7 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 328

You deserved it 3 204

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Top comments

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:32

wow...best FML ever

dcam13 19

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:49

okay OP no need to get angry and post your fml in all caps too...

Comments

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:32

wow...best FML ever

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:42

WOW THAT REALLY SUCKS. FYL

dcam13 19

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:49

okay OP no need to get angry and post your fml in all caps too...

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:55

so? hold shift down, now is not caps

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:06

I don't see how this is considered a FML; a minor setback perhaps.

Drigr 9

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:06

that was at 53. it didn't post right

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:12

What do you mean by it didn't post right?

KiwiExchange 16

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:19

lols, this made my day.

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:23

48 equals WIN pahaha that totally just made my day (;

kellbelle032398 0

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:29

57-right??! i was just gonna say that! looks like OP HASN'T tried everything. and OP, how is this an FML? if u have to email someone for business or something, explain in the email y ur typing in all caps. simple, and not FML worthy.

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:43

NO IT ISN'T

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:51

wow. this is ... fantastic (:

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:54

haa this Is best

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:55

wow 48 obviously it is still stuck and he didn't think of the shift key

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 0:00

I DONT KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!! LOUD NOISES!!

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 0:26

OP THIS IS A VIRUS 'CAUSE IT'S HAPPENING TO ME TOO BRO

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 0:28

ME TOO lol

lionheart822 13

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 0:29

lol @28. just so you know, there's someone with that exact same pic that posted a comment on the next FML about the plane ride. so I wonder who's faking it? xD

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 0:30

shift key :) sucks to be you op don't go on any chat sites people will think ur yelling :p

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 1:07

HAHAH!THAT'S FUNNY! :D

davidharrison 0

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 1:22

fail ratso

MyMilkShake2Yard 0

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 1:42

this is fake

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 1:42

I doubt this is FML is real. What person knows how to navigate through a website like FML before they understand the concepts of a keyboard and the computer in general.

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 1:49

this is for sure the best FML ever. I laughed so hard

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 1:49

114 Your amazing! Long live Ron Burgandy!

sterlingarcher 1

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:24

LOL NOW I FEEL LIKE TYPING IN ALL CAPS! HAHA..BTW BEST FML EVER!! LOL

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:43

your picture is beautiful!!! 

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:57

DON'T YELL AT ME

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 3:01

THIS ONE MADE ME LOL

IStoleTheCookies 16

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 3:04

Hahahahaha. This is hilarious LOL xD

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 3:19

This FmL is boss.

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 3:39

this is stupid why is the today in caps u can tell this was on purpose.

OvenproofToast 0

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 3:59

ever heard of a joke?

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 4:04

except one thing, and I may be wrong, not sure but when posting fml's, doesn't it automatically start with "Today," which isn't in all caps, so why is this fml in all caps when it says "TODAY," again I may be wrong but it seems a bit fake, just wondering

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 4:07

Read the comments and you'll find you're wrong indeed. You have to add the today part yourself. Edit: goddamnit the mods are fast today :D

fmylife86541920 0

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 4:14

wow fail the today at the beginning is automatic therefore would not be in all caps. idiot.

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 4:15

134 how dumb are you? 48 was making a joke.

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Thursday 24 March 2011 6:00

no shit dumbass. I'm pretty sure he knew that.

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Thursday 24 March 2011 6:59

GOSH EVERYONE, STOP YELLING!! OP, U 2.

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Sunday 27 March 2011 18:10

48 was kidding man

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Monday 28 March 2011 8:33

299 greatest picture ever... period

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Thursday 21 April 2011 8:11

28 ur hot as shit

mthal 0

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Saturday 23 April 2011 0:18

hmm funny that your dots are not influented with caps ;)

The_Moustache 6

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Saturday 23 April 2011 17:18

OH LOHD IT HAPPENED TO ME TOO!

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Saturday 7 May 2011 6:06

If you're on a Mac if you're on capslock and press Shift it will still stay as capslock :P

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Monday 11 July 2011 14:31

that's why u don't buy macs

lovelylittleme 0

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Tuesday 26 July 2011 22:07

uhhh hold down shift maybe?

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Tuesday 2 August 2011 2:35

u wouldnt be able to get periods

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Tuesday 2 August 2011 11:35

*Facepalm*

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Thursday 22 September 2011 16:03

You could try on screen keyboard dumbass

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:33

:) HAPPENS TO ME ALL THE TIME! :) just kidding

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:36

hahaha:P

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:43

THIS IS NO LAUGHING MATTER, SAMETHING HAPPENED TO ME! MY LIFE HAS BEEN FALLING APART BECAUSE OF IT. EVERYBODY THINKS I AM YELLING AT THEM!

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:49

Well the exclamation marks aren't helping.

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:51

Let's just cough up a shit ton if money for a smart phone when we can just unstick the key!!! Sorry dude, logic fail.

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 0:39

#3, was that a Flo refrence? Hilarious!

EmperorPsycho 0

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 1:32

haha that same joke was on yahoo answers...

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 1:47

AMNEHWYQIODJ DBSJAOW WHAKSO D SJSOWJ SAME THING HAPPENED TO ME1111111

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:47

wut and the heck were you trying to say-_-

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 3:00

207 your pic is cute.

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 4:13

ur pretty lol

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Saturday 26 March 2011 4:25

hehe

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Wednesday 13 April 2011 23:16

#32 y r u yelling at me haha jk jk lol

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Thursday 14 July 2011 5:08

we should skate together ;)

Monday 21 March 2011 22:33

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.. Show it anyway

greenlantern27 6

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:35

They might have the website favourited on their computer. Or they might be using the FML iPhone app.

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:36

BECAUSE LINKS STILL WORK WHEN YOU TYPE THEM IN CAPS. DUMBASS.

love_me_electric 20

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:37

web addresses aren't case sensitive...

that_is_Nathy 9

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:40

hmm history? marked pages? even if it's fake, it made me smile, so I like it

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:42

some are, some aren't... x.com is not case sensitive (xcom is awesome, but that was random) x.com/items/Elerium114.doc is case sensitive because it refers to an exact file (YouTube file links)

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:44

fuck me, YouTube links are the same... got distracted

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 3:36

yes they are. it's just that most are set for that kind of thing.

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Thursday 24 March 2011 4:36

ikr these guys r retarded

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Monday 22 August 2011 15:33

Are u fucking retarded. All she did was type FMYLIFE.COM it stilll goes to the website caps or not u dum dum

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:33

shift key. funny as hell though

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:26

really how the fuck did this get on here? moderators shoul step up their game if this crap comes through

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 0:29

that's what I was thinking! lmfao

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:09

I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL I'VE BEEN HAVING THE SAME PROBLEM FOR LIKE A MONTH!!! NOTHING WILL FIX IT!!!!! And it is much more difficult to type while holding down the shift key like I am doing now..... SO I JUST END UP TYPING LIKE THIS!!!!! GOOD LUCK OP!!!

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:33

lol first all caps fml I've ever seen

Oz87 5

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:19

moi aussi

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:36

Oooooo 6 I love LIGHTS too! :D Highfive!

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:33

it's stuck dumbass

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:33

dude thats a fail.

dc295 3

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:37

ur a fail. this FML aas awesome

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Monday 21 March 2011 23:30

nah brah this is a win

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:33

And now everyone will think op is yelling at them.

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:34

hOLD sHIFT...dUH

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Tuesday 22 March 2011 0:38

ikr?

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Thursday 23 June 2011 9:57

Yes. Type with one finger on the shift key. Forever. D= Or have fun yelling at people.

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Monday 21 March 2011 22:35

Wow. very clever. ydi for posting a fake fml