Work: Today, I once again had to tell one of my elderly patients not... - FML

By Anonymous - 05/05/2014 02:58 - United States - Mount Airy

Today, I once again had to tell one of my elderly patients not to grope me. He responded by throwing his bedpan at me. It was full. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 291

You deserved it 4 017

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By OhPleaseNo - 07/04/2020 14:00 - OhPleaseNo

Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 701

You deserved it 187

By Anonymous - 28/12/2018 16:00

Today, my violent geriatric patient was trying to escape the facility. When I intervened, she poked my belly then told me I was squishy and that I might explode. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 363

You deserved it 271

By Celewyn - 04/10/2016 11:11 - Australia

Today, my patient knocked my glasses off as I assisted him in the shower. We both looked in terror as they fell into his unflushed toilet. This patient was isolated due to a contagious infection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 078

You deserved it 1 025

By Anonymous - 28/05/2009 05:04 - United States

Today, I was dealing with a psychiatric patient with a colonostomy bag. She got agitated and ripped the bag from her abdomen and threw it at my face. I got a bag filled with poop thrown at my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 263

You deserved it 3 435

By CathyM - 27/09/2011 05:18 - United States

Today, I was in the ER where I work as a registrar. A patient received a plastic urinal to use in his room. Most patients throw them away when they leave. He, however, decided to take it with him, and as he checked out, put it on the registration counter. Two feet from my face. It was used. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 879

You deserved it 2 791

By ANON - 21/09/2016 14:09 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I visited my Aunt in hospital. Another patient got jealous, so she threw a tantrum. She threw things at us, pulled her drip out, threw herself to the floor, screamed, pounded the floor with her fists and pissed herself. My aunt is still waiting for a new room, and the staff blame me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 776

You deserved it 781

A saint

By Anonymous - 14/06/2020 20:07

Today, I'm taking care of my bedridden, 94-year-old grandma. She woke me up at 6 a.m. only to tell me her UTI is still there. Later, she made me interrupt my 15-minute-dinner a total of 4 times because she wanted things like "more lotion in her buttcrack." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 640

You deserved it 211

By FML - 12/11/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, I held a container while a patient tried to throw up in it. She missed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 417

You deserved it 3 279

Just a prank, son!

By barface - 11/01/2012 02:52 - United States

Today, while very sick, throwing up in a bucket beside my bed, my dad came in pushed my face into the bucket. For a laugh, apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 840

You deserved it 2 810

By Anonymous - 06/09/2016 13:36 - Estonia - Tartu

Today, at the hardware store, I had to physically restrain my senile grandpa from trying to take a crap in one of the display toilets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 396

You deserved it 971

Next

Top comments

masturdad 11

Monday 5 May 2014 10:09

The fact he needs a bedpan shows that he's too old to grope anything

foxwasalamb 24

Monday 5 May 2014 10:09

he wants his action and wants it now dammit!

Comments

spluver0005 17

Monday 5 May 2014 18:39

At first I read it as parents instead of patients. I was like what the heck?

ThaKranium 10

Monday 5 May 2014 19:24

Guess you could say you're pissed off. That what he did was basically ******** on your life.

skyeyez9 24

Monday 5 May 2014 20:03

And this is probably why the elderly are abused in nursing homes. All you hear on the news is "nurse hit an elderly patient while omitting the part where he tried to rip her shirt off or threw a full bedpan at her."

MadmanOZ 10

Monday 5 May 2014 21:41

i hope to be able to grope young nurses when im a dirty old man!

worldclassrager 39

Monday 5 May 2014 21:54

That's well excessive

KingreX32 21

Monday 5 May 2014 22:18

ew **** that. Id quit on the spot.

MattM95 16

Monday 5 May 2014 23:00

Wow that must be horrible and just disgusting. I bet it takes a lot of patience to be in that field of work. I hope that doesn't occur often because that would be horrible to experience.

avidreader121 7

Monday 5 May 2014 23:52

You habe to love dementia!

Witchylady 17

Tuesday 6 May 2014 1:16

Oh you poor thing. I feel for you. You have to contend with dirty old men and pee. Not a good combination.

shaaantz18 1

Tuesday 6 May 2014 4:47

being a CNA definitely is not an easy job but it takes a special kind of person to do that. you're gonna complain because someone with dementia did something out of the ordinary? happens every day in nursing homes. obviously you are in the wrong profession.

JME0058 8

Tuesday 6 May 2014 12:40

Obviously op knows that stuff like this happens everyday. That doesn't mean she can't vent her frustrations. I work in a nursing home as a cna and it can get extremely frustrating sometimes. You gotta blow off steam somehow. Op chose FML to vent.

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The Top

Today, I've finally got my mental health under control after decades of flailing. I also started showing signs of Serotonin Syndrome, which is caused by my meds and could result in seizure and death. So my choices are the swirling void of depression or possibly just the void. FML

I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 92

Today, I found out that if you put tea bags into a cup of hot water, the tea bags will melt. The result: You get to drink and chew tea leaves at the same time, with little bits of actual tea to help make them go down. 0/10, do not recommend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93

You deserved it 416

The Top

Today, I dropped a box from my dad's attic and blew a hole in my foot. I now have 3 toes missing because dad forgot he once wrestled a gun away from some kid trying to steal his wallet, meant to give it to the police, but kept forgetting, and it wound up in the attic for 11 years until today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 275

You deserved it 130

Today, my assistant booked me an important meeting tomorrow, which is also our anniversary. My boss says I can’t miss the meeting or I’ll be sacked, and since I forgot our anniversary last year, my wife swears she’ll divorce me if I miss this year. I have no good options here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 738

You deserved it 789

Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 258

You deserved it 31 978

Today, my puppy went missing. I found him, unconscious but thankfully alive, in a taped-up box with no holes. My little brother eventually confessed to doing it because he wanted to sell my puppy on eBay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 466

You deserved it 1 425

Today, I was at work, when an elderly lady casually mentioned it was her birthday. I motioned two of my coworkers over, and we sang a little happy birthday to her over the phone. Our boss stormed in mid-song and suspended all three of us on the spot for "unprofessional behavior." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 300

You deserved it 2 810

Today, my boss used our communal notebook to bitch out our entire department for not leaving a note notifying her that one of the machines was down. She wrote it on the same page as the note I left saying that one of the machines was down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 736

You deserved it 1 225