Ear Invasion
Albuquerque, United States
Today, I made a new friend: the cricket the doctor pulled out of my ear canal. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
nk
United States
Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML
Anonymous
Australia
Today, I went through the nightmare of having to go to my doctor so he could remove a living spider from my nasal cavity. FML
Anonymous
United States
Waxing and waning
Today, I went to the doctor's to get a checkup. When the nurse stuck the Otoscope into my ear to look, she was disgusted. When she pulled it out, she told me that I had an ear infection, and that she'd popped a pimple in there by mistake. FML
jaqlove
Clementon, United States
Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML
Xandriajoy10
Australia
Today, a fly flew into my ear canal and got stuck. It was the most horrifying two minutes of my life. FML
Anonymous
Littleton, United States
Top o' the mornin' to ya
Today, I woke up bright and early… because a spider crawled into my ear. FML
Anonymous
Ewwwwww
Today, my excruciating ear pain turned out to be a bastard maggot eating away at all the vital things behind my eardrum. The doctor pulled it out, but I’m now permanently deaf in that ear and can’t balance. I fall if I try to stand or walk further than 5 feet. FML
John
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
Saint Lucia
Creepy crawlies
Today, I discovered that it is possible for bugs to lay eggs in your ears. FML
Anonymous
Victoria, Canada
I am the passenger
Today, when I went to the bathroom, I found an earwig in my underpants. Yes, it was alive. FML
caempa
Australia
Today, I was taking my earrings out and thought I had lost the back of one. Turns out my ear infection has caused the flesh of my ear to grow around and engulf the back of my earring and it is still stuck in there. FML
Top comments
Codezlol 21
Did you name him Jiminy??
isallwaysme 27
that little bugger
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Comments (90)
djxerxes9000 18
Well that just ain't cricket!
Kalipczo 21
Hopefully it didn't lay behbehs
testestestes123 4
Those damn cricket pediphiles. Laying behbehs and such. I call that rape as opposed to a lay. Oh wait, you meant lay eggs/have babies...or did you? Either way, I hope it didn't lay babies too. That would be wrong
buckdharma 37
This explains why everytime op heard the phone ringing, there was no one on the line.
slowlybreakingme 14
I'm absolutely terrified of crickets. I'd probably cry and pass out. You brave brave soul.
buddy51 23
OP- Use your asthma inhaler and suck in an earwig to complete your bug collection....
simply_elle13 5
no wonder you couldnt find the cricket that was keeping you up at night. it was in your ear the whole time.
ni0ve 9
"I swear I hear a cricket" "I don't hear a cricket"
bReLiNg 18
Reminds me of the Oogie boogie man from nightmare before Christmas....
skip_m 6
Music to your ears?
Korosuhito 26
Better out than in :)