Animals: Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead...

By ItHurtsLIkeHell - 01/03/2010 09:13 - Malaysia

Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 916

You deserved it 43 064

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Roselyn Cazares - 23/07/2017 19:55

Today, I was petting my female hamster when I felt a big mass under her. I immediately thought it was a tumor so I poked it to see if it hurt her. It didn't. Turns out my female hamster is actually a male, and he has really big balls. I touched my hamster's balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 154

You deserved it 1 923

By whymommywhy - 21/04/2009 03:11 - United States

Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 285

You deserved it 26 947

By zac545 - 19/02/2009 06:14 - United States

Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 948

You deserved it 11 230

By roze198765 - 04/08/2011 01:19 - United States

Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 856

You deserved it 4 377

By EpicFail - 04/02/2009 23:29 - United States

Today, I fell asleep. I felt something on my face. I batted it away. It was my hamster. It died from a concussion upon hitting the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 770

You deserved it 16 003

Poor little guy

By Anonymous - 04/03/2021 14:01

Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 924

You deserved it 155

So…

By Anonymous - 29/03/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 752

You deserved it 7 620

By deadhamster - 03/02/2012 18:29 - United States

Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 437

You deserved it 5 044

By Anonymous - 22/10/2011 06:10 - United States

Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 613

You deserved it 53 626

By HttpsHaileyy - 15/06/2015 20:02 - United States

Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed me with a stool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 791

You deserved it 9 587

RedTriceratops 0

Monday 1 March 2010 16:05

But I don't have testicles.

cabbitt 0

Monday 1 March 2010 16:07

I hope you learned to look where you sit.

Comments

Foxy_On_Fire 21

Monday 1 March 2010 20:03

hahahahahahahaha that had to hurt.

alice_wt 0

Monday 1 March 2010 20:10

and why won't everyone shut up already about the grammar. I also thought "learnt" was wrong, and its also underlined red from the grammar checking tool, but whatever. if it's the british way, then so be it

DzNutz619 0

Monday 1 March 2010 20:12

surprise

hailphire130 0

Monday 1 March 2010 20:30

what's with all the ydi? he said accidentally, which means he wasn't necessarily bein an idiot. I hav a hamster and they run everywhere so it's hard to keep an eye on them sometimes

pendulum2012 0

Monday 1 March 2010 21:01

All of your comments are so angry, do they have Midol in Canada?

dannthemannxx 0

Monday 1 March 2010 21:04

ydi for animal crueltyyyy.

MasterConan 0

Monday 1 March 2010 21:21

'lernt' is not a ******* word! u dumb shit!

redbluegreen 40

Monday 1 March 2010 21:34

"Lernt" most certainly is not a word. "Learnt" is, actually. Look it up, as many others have provided links. We're just beating a dead horse at this point.