Today, I learned that, when you ask your girlfriend "Do you think we're having sex too often?" she might interpret it as, "I don't think we should have sex ever again," and entirely stop talking to you. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Hang ups
Today, my girlfriend complained that we never have sex anymore. The only way she ever wants sex is missionary, with barely any foreplay. When I asked if we could spice things up and mentioned a few simple ideas, she said the conversation was making her uncomfortable and changed the subject. FML
That thing you do
Today, after sex, my wife of three months said, "You know, sex isn't as good now that we're married… Maybe we should take a break." I said we should spice things up. She said, firmly, "No, let's stop" and wouldn't talk to me for the rest of the night. FML
Topping from the bottom
Today, my girlfriend wanted to have a conversation about sex. After she finished telling me what she liked, in exact detail, I said, "Well, I really like…" She cut me off and said, "I don't give a fuck what you like." FML
Time is money
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Get on with it
Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, she suddenly said : "Are you going to be done any time soon?" FML
Minor Threat
Today, after a big argument, my girlfriend looked me dead in the eyes and said, "I can go the rest of my life without sex, you know." FML
Effective
Today, I realized my boyfriend uses sex as a way to get me to stop talking. FML
Get on with it!
Today, I realized my girlfriend thinks that the goal of sex is to get it over with as quickly as possible. FML
Deal breaker
Today, my fiancée told me that she thinks she's asexual. Guess I know why we haven't had sex in months. When I said this was a deal breaker, she said, "If you'd stop being a horny pig for five seconds, it wouldn't be." FML
Mystery shutdown
Today, my wife always told me she loved sex too much to ever give it up. I don’t know what’s happened recently but she’s now angry for no reason, bitter at the world, makes me suffer just for existing, and yes, she’s cancelled all intimacy and sex for the foreseeable future. FML
Top comments
FusionPlacebo 26
Is it bad to have lots of sex with her? Why'd you even ask that, of course she's bound to get offended by it
Kitty_Kat44 31
Shouldn't have asked.
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Comments (97)
ughvictoriaxd 12
Then she's not worth it... She doesn't care about how your feeling
DayQuilAssLeak 2
You ****** up
thelastavailable 13
Never realised there was such a thing as "too much sex".
RS_Menace 19
thats one question you should never ask your girlfriend, take as much of it while you can get it bud and dont question it lol
mintlegendary 14
U dum
seriouslygrowup 11
omg. there is no such thing as having sex too often
SasquatchDeluxe 10
NEVER ask that -- just enjoy what you've got, because it will be over soon enough.
emilytheperson 17
I could see that happening..
gqlmno 23
and guess who went from to much sex to none. You sir are an idiot
Addiction333 14
Sounds like she just needed an excuse to stop talking to you. Your question wasn't the issue.