Today, I learned that my boyfriend hides valuables in the washing machine under dirty clothes when leaving town for the weekend. I learned this AFTER I'd done a load of laundry. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found a pair of women's underwear in the laundry that wasn't mine. I confronted my boyfriend about it. They were his. FML
Today, I picked up my laundry from the wash-and-fold and proceeded to put everything away. I noticed a hand towel that wasn't mine and made a mental note to return it; turned out they'd given me someone else's boxers as well. My boyfriend doesn't believe me. FML
Today, and for weeks now, I was sure my underwear was going missing. I found out why. My husband's brother has been stealing them whenever he visits, presumably to masturbate with. I literally caught him shoving an unwashed pair into his pocket he'd stolen from my laundry pile. Creep. FML
Today, I went to the laundromat. I put a load in the dryer and walked away to check on my other load. When I came back, I saw a homeless man putting his dirty, wet underwear in the dryer with my clean clothes. FML
Today, I found out that my ex-boyfriend stole a pair of my underwear, and still wears them to this day. FML
Today, my boyfriend's parents found out we had a sleepover while they were on vacation. His dog had retrieved the underwear I had unknowingly left and brought them to his mom. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend secretly using my hair straightener while I was in the other room. Too embarrassed to talk to him about it, I left and came back later, only to discover him slipping on a pair of my panties. FML
Today, my boyfriend sneaked into my room, not knowing I wasn't home. It would have been great, except my dad went in my room to put laundry away. FML
Today, I went to pick up my laundry from the communal machines in my apartment building. When I got there, all my clothes were neatly folded on top of the dryer. I was impressed, until I realized half of the pile wasn’t mine. I'd been carrying someone else’s underwear up to my apartment. FML
Today, I heard my washing machine making a strange noise. I nervously waited for the cycle to end so I could open it and investigate. The noise was my car keys. I'd somehow washed them, my wallet and $20 without noticing. FML
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Top comments
DameGreyWulf 1
Well... certainly nobody would check, so he's a genius... albeit an unfortunate one.
iZ3r0 0
Yea that does suck.. what kind of things was he hideing??
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Comments (59)
theloftogden 0
I think its time to replace your idiot boyfriend.
aero_fml 0
Oh really? Would you look in the washing machine if you were going to rob a place? 'Nuff said.
null_fml 11
I wouldn't look under dirty clothes in a washing machine. But then again, I also wouldn't look in the bottom of a vegetable crisper, or inside an old rice box in the back of a cupboard, or lots of other places that wouldn't actually risk damaging my valuables.
DameGreyWulf 1
Actually, you would, because you just listed them as possible hiding places! NONE OF US CAN HIDE OUR VALUABLES THERE ANYMORE THANKS A LOT JERK
bdraivains 0
I agree, your life sucks because you're dating a retard. Also, you totally deserved it for dating a retard.
LilaBear 2
Haha. That's totally your bf's fault.
anbu4312 0
Your bf sounds like an idiot.......lol sorry for you though, it's really not your fault he's a moron.
blastvortex 4
Considering he brought it upon himself, this F'd his life, not yours. Don't blame yourself for his stupidity.
Ghado 1
Wtf no sense your always supposed to do the laundry. Get back to the kitchen and make me a sammich
JH159753 21
**** you number 50
wriptidez 0
hes a dummy
SaRah_In_LoVe 0
Haha paranoid much?
Staige40 0
he's not very smart 0.o