Love: Today, I leaned over my sleeping girlfriend, kissed her cheek... - FML

By Anonymous - 20/10/2015 09:44 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I leaned over my sleeping girlfriend, kissed her cheek and told her I love her. She punched me in the ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 824

You deserved it 3 657

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Same thing different taste

By RomanceFail - 02/04/2015 12:51 - United States - Crestwood

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 041

You deserved it 3 381

Love hurts

By wray16 - 26/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 132

Action - Reaction

By CaptBlood - 21/05/2021 00:01

Today, before I went to work, I wanted to kiss my wife goodbye while she was asleep, She punched me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 834

You deserved it 183

Ouch!

By P0wned - 29/09/2009 21:21 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 982

You deserved it 5 274

By Anonymous - 15/05/2013 20:21 - United States

Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 676

You deserved it 4 572

By randomguy - 09/07/2012 15:09 - United States - Saylorsburg

Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 974

You deserved it 12 166

Romantic move

By soomeone - 16/02/2010 19:28 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 682

You deserved it 25 655

By Anonymous - 21/10/2014 15:49 - United States - Bedford

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 822

You deserved it 7 808

By happybidet - 31/10/2016 13:02 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 721

You deserved it 881

By Anonymous - 21/06/2016 23:24 - United States - Winder

Today, my girl and I got in a huge fight. Because I cuddled with her the wrong way. While I was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 560

You deserved it 1 090

Next

Top comments

rebelsrock 17

Tuesday 20 October 2015 14:53

I love it when girls are affectionate

UserOfTheMind 24

Tuesday 20 October 2015 14:56

You don't mess with someone's sleep... ever. That shit is precious.

Comments

rebelsrock 17

Tuesday 20 October 2015 14:53

I love it when girls are affectionate

beeferjay 34

Tuesday 20 October 2015 15:50

oh yeah, Palmela Handerson is the best gf EVAR! p.s. I didn't know your hand had a cheek

Zebediabolical 39

Tuesday 20 October 2015 16:23

I prefer Lindsay Lohand. She gets CRAZY if you let her.

PlasticElite17 6

Tuesday 20 October 2015 19:50

Handjalina Jolie?

science-teacher 15

Tuesday 20 October 2015 14:54

Sounds like she loves you a whole punch

daGun 18

Tuesday 20 October 2015 22:19

Love will knock you out!

LilMissCanadian 22

Wednesday 21 October 2015 1:15

Sounds like they hit it off!

RainbowLibster 17

Tuesday 20 October 2015 14:55

So affectionate

UserOfTheMind 24

Tuesday 20 October 2015 14:56

You don't mess with someone's sleep... ever. That shit is precious.

erin55378 17

Tuesday 20 October 2015 14:57

Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed..

MasterTron 24

Wednesday 21 October 2015 0:17

Who said she woke up?

itsme82 18

Tuesday 20 October 2015 14:58

I laughed so hard at this. Serves you right for messing with her.

XxDanno316xX 27

Tuesday 20 October 2015 15:40

How exactly was he messing with her?

beeferjay 34

Tuesday 20 October 2015 15:54

you obviously don't sleep with women

CaletheLion 15

Tuesday 20 October 2015 15:08

Wow, I didn't know my own hand could punch me like that.

band_geek 18

Tuesday 20 October 2015 15:09

Hope it wasn't beacuse you weren't doing someone else in her sleep and the you in her dream wasn't whispering that to the other person in her dream state. But if she were awake when she did that, well, then!

TreeTreeMan 23

Tuesday 20 October 2015 15:14

That's how you know she's a keeper

jaspinkgrl01 18

Tuesday 20 October 2015 15:21

She could've been frightened by the sudden noise in her ear and punched you

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my old boss is such an arsehole that not only did he fire me last week, he completely forgot about firing me and when he saw me in the shop as a customer, he yelled at me for being late and out of uniform. I swear his mother didn’t birth him, she shat him out the other hole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 84

Today, my nosey louse of a coworker went to HR and told them I was snorting drugs at my desk. I was using nasal saline, as the dry winter weather wreaks havoc on my sinuses. The fact that they even brought me in pisses me off beyond words. FML

I agree, your life sucks 480

You deserved it 78

The Top

Today, in a crowded hallway, I saw the guy I fancy standing in front of me, with his arms open wide. Thinking he wanted to hug me, I wrapped my arms around him and stepped back. He looked at me like I was nuts. I then realised he was trying to hug the girl next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 636

You deserved it 638

Today, the cut on my face from getting hit with a baseball healed. It's left a dick-shaped scar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 276

You deserved it 1 570

Today, my son watched some ridiculous Japanese cartoon about shokugeki cooking and is convinced he's the greatest cook ever by copying what happens in the show. He set fire to my frying pan, panicked, and dumped it in the ceramic sink, which cracked from the heat and flooded my kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 124

You deserved it 363

Today, I was so excited to finally use my $45 gift card to a hair salon. I walk up to the doors to find them locked, and to look inside to see that the salon was not only closed, but out of business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 912

You deserved it 4 868

Today, I found out that ever since I got my blonde highlights, I've been mocked behind my back at work, and nicknamed "The Skunk". FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 884

You deserved it 13 420

Today, our mom hit my brother's head hard against the wall. He was taken to the hospital with a head wound. He came home in the evening, and said that his mom told him to say that it was his sister who'd hit him with a ball. My brother had told me the story and I'd recorded it on a tape recorder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 181

You deserved it 142