Miscellaneous: Today, I helped an old man who fell over. Turns out he was drunk...

By philip708 - 27/08/2015 06:46 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I helped an old man who fell over. Turns out he was drunk and had pissed himself. He decided to thank me with a hug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 710

You deserved it 1 819

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 09/11/2010 11:13 - India

Today, I saw an old homeless man who had just fallen down due to his drinking. Everyone laughed at him, but I felt bad, so I went to help him up. My reward? A quick punch in the face, landing me in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 931

You deserved it 6 047

By mjperfetti84 - 22/11/2009 13:53 - United States

Today, I helped an old man with his groceries, because he was struggling and he had a cane. After, I was nice enough to drive him home. He went to thank me by giving me a kiss on the cheek. Then he stuck his tongue out, and tried to French kiss me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 483

You deserved it 6 178

By Erik Aleckson - 05/05/2019 02:00

Today, at my hotel job, I had to help a drunk naked guy back into his room. Earlier today, a fat old guy wearing only briefs came down to the lobby drunk as hell. I used to like my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 861

You deserved it 134

We could be heroes

By OhPleaseNo - 07/04/2020 14:00 - OhPleaseNo

Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 702

You deserved it 187

By Anonymous - 10/05/2014 13:00 - United States

Today, a guy drunkenly professed his love for me. He did this after walking in on me peeing, which he decided was the time to tell me such a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 976

You deserved it 3 769

Great seeing you again

By Kristin - 03/01/2011 04:14 - United States

Today, my husband's old fraternity brother came to visit. He fell out of his car, puked, then passed out drunk in our driveway. We got him to the bathroom, where he fell asleep. He woke up at 4am, wandered around the house naked, pooped in my trash can, then passed out again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 581

You deserved it 3 905

By blinkme - 28/08/2009 05:39 - United States

Today, I was at a concert and the guy who was selling the drinks tripped and fell down the stairs, landing on the floor next to me and the drinks went all over. I went to make sure he was okay and helped pick up the drinks. After assuring me he was okay, he gave me a free soda. It exploded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 696

You deserved it 13 803

Not my problem

By Anonymous - 13/10/2022 12:00

Today, I watched an old man pee himself while he was talking to me at work. I didn't do anything or say something, solely because he didn't get any on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 780

You deserved it 118

Pish yerself

By breyn - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while working at my salon, I was cutting an older gentleman's hair. When he got up to leave, everyone noticed he had clearly pissed his pants. I felt bad for him until he laughed and said, "Here's your tip, have fun cleaning that up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 032

You deserved it 2 514

By Anonymous - 07/01/2013 11:11 - Australia - Hurstville

Today, an intoxicated gentleman stumbled into my shop requesting alcohol, which I do not sell. When I informed him of this, he expressed his disappointment by urinating on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 344

You deserved it 2 256

justanonymous123 13

Thursday 27 August 2015 16:08

No good deed goes unpunished.

stryder9090 28

Thursday 27 August 2015 16:10

A golden hug from a golden aged individual. Your day can't get any brighter!

Comments

koganti 18

Thursday 27 August 2015 16:26

Good karma hit's you sooner or later

mbock 15

Thursday 27 August 2015 16:36

shit happens...when I'm old I will still have some drinks. I may piss myself but pay people in hugs for good deeds!!! just hug it out

Zaneal 8

Thursday 27 August 2015 16:46

Straya ****!

beararm 11

Thursday 27 August 2015 16:52

he gave u a warm welcome?

chocolatelover96 14

Thursday 27 August 2015 17:15

Kudos to you for helping him though, you sound like a decent human being :) It could have been a lot worse.

I_Like_Dogs 28

Thursday 27 August 2015 18:52

You made an elderly man very happee :)

R2Y2 22

Thursday 27 August 2015 20:57

I bet that was an extra warm hug, wasn't it?

jessie841 11

Thursday 27 August 2015 21:08

At least you helped him

worldclassrager 39

Thursday 27 August 2015 23:04

A side hug right? Either way I don't think it will be that bad on you...at least lets hope so

MGC501 13

Friday 28 August 2015 0:14

Aww, that sucks. But hey, you did a good thing! As for him, it's the intention that counts, right?

Keywords

Mental health OCD Health Relatable Work Awkward Boredom Friends Vacation Transportation Annoying Music AITA Jewelry Love Cars Embarrassing Kids Family Babysitter Parents Miscellaneous Death Thief Money Food Birthday Gross Farts Underwear

The Top

Today, I was finishing a cigarette outside of the mall when we heard someone fart. Turns out it was a little girl. They looked around, so jokingly I said, "We didn't hear anything." Her family giggled and so did we, until everyone realized the little girl was now sobbing. I'm a POS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 189

Today, I got lost at Best Buy. Meanwhile, my mom freaked out, and they called out my name over the intercom. When I walked up to the desk and they saw I was 17, the employees burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 044

You deserved it 4 436

The Top

Today, at my job in a pub, I was cleaning the pub garden ready for closedown. There was a girl crouched on the floor under a table. By the time I'd realised what she was doing and turned around, she'd already finished, apologised, and left me to clean up her piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 469

You deserved it 667

Today, campus security called to inform me that my car had been in an accident. I rushed down to the security office to find most of the officers laughing. A portable john blew over on to my car and smashed my rear window. Now, security calls me "Port-A-Potty Guy," and my car smells like shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 402

You deserved it 2 307

Today, I asked my boyfriend if my ass looked big in my new jeans. He looked, and then started singing "I like big butts and I cannot lie". FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 168

You deserved it 44 722

Today, my coworkers decided to play a game of "Who Can Piss the Boss Off the Most". I opted not to play, but I still won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 658

You deserved it 5 722

Today, I had to sit in the hospital with my 88-year-old grandfather by myself. During the five hours I was there, he insisted on sharing the intimate details of his many sexcapades that he has had since World War II. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 516

You deserved it 3 114

Today, my boss got angry at me because my English is better than his. He accused me of trying to steal his management position, and implied that I'll be lucky if I still have a job by the end of the month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 969

You deserved it 1 740