Cars and Transportation: Shit, dude

Shit, dude

By Johnny on the Spot - 12/02/2009 17:19 - United States

Today, campus security called to inform me that my car had been in an accident. I rushed down to the security office to find most of the officers laughing. A portable john blew over on to my car and smashed my rear window. Now, security calls me "Port-A-Potty Guy," and my car smells like shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 410

You deserved it 2 318

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/11/2009 19:49 - United States

Today, while I was driving out of the student parking lot I saw people laughing. Then the old security lady yelled for me to stop. She told me my books were on the top of my car but one had already fallen off. I looked in my rearview mirror and saw all of my school papers flying everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 016

You deserved it 31 309

By Anonymous - 28/09/2011 15:53 - United States

Today, campus security called me to let me know a lawnmower crashed into my car. Apparently the guy mowing the lawn lost control. My car wasn't parked by any grass. I need a new bumper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 856

You deserved it 2 181

Pranked

By dontevenassk - 12/06/2009 04:44 - Canada

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to scare me by tilting the portable street toilets while I was taking a dump in one of them. One of my friends accidentally rocked it too hard and it fell on the floor. They wouldn't even let me sit in the car after because I had shit all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 161

You deserved it 3 781

By Anonymous - 12/10/2018 14:00

Today, I was at the park and needed to take a piss really badly. I opened my car door and stood to pee, but good old Mother Nature ran by and the wind blew it all into my car. My entire driver side smells like pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 3 857

By unfortunatelyunlucky - 12/12/2010 07:17 - United States

Today, while parked at school, someone broke into my car by smashing the window. I called the police and they informed me I could drive it to the local station as it was an easy 2 minute drive. As I was driving there, I got pulled over for driving with a smashed window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 087

You deserved it 2 602

By eyeleanify - 10/12/2010 08:12 - United States

Today, I hit a car while trying to park. Assuming that no one saw, I moved my car and parked somewhere else. Hours later I get a call from the university police. While backing up to go to the police station I hit another car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 746

You deserved it 56 004

Many rivers to cross

By mississpissi - 14/07/2015 12:00 - United Kingdom - Slough

Today, the waste disposal truck managed to tip over a Portapotty on our work site, causing the contents to overflow and run down the bank towards my Portakabin office, where someone had left the door open. All my money, ID, and my car keys are now shut off to me by a river of shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 047

You deserved it 1 953

Trashed

By rainey - 03/02/2010 06:27 - United States

Today, my car alarm went off so I went outside to investigate. Apparently, the abundant rain water in my street had swept a trash can five houses down, only to be stopped by my car. My bumper was dented by a run-away waste receptacle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 413

You deserved it 2 585

By whatthewoah - 02/09/2010 18:10 - United States

Today, I went to the bookstore. While I was in line, I heard everyone talking about how a book cart had gotten loose and rolled down the parking lot into a car, smashing the front. It was my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 136

You deserved it 2 235

Get off my hood

By Anonymous - 03/01/2016 23:00 - United States - Kennett Square

Today, I was at work, a grocery store, and my manager came up to me while I was on my lunch break. He told me that a customer said someone in the parking lot had been loitering around the cars. I went outside to investigate and saw a drunk man pooping on the front of a car. That car was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 465

You deserved it 1 271

Tomaino 3

Friday 11 December 2009 2:59

You could have been the guy IN the Porta-Potty.

badonis 0

Friday 13 February 2009 0:47

wow, how shitty is that?

Comments

badonis 0

Friday 13 February 2009 0:47

wow, how shitty is that?

KRYPTON1T3 5

Monday 7 March 2011 21:57

portable John. lol. and yes, that is extremely shitty.

Dr_Phil 0

Friday 13 February 2009 1:08

Well that's a pretty shitty situation to be in.

Weird_Gurl7504 0

Monday 7 June 2010 2:53

ur an idiot

mochoch 0

Friday 13 February 2009 5:47

well atleast you have a car and go to college... you could be a homeless bum. so it is not that bad.

MiGman 5

Friday 18 June 2010 9:19

I'd rather not have a car; than have a car full of a tonne of shit

geon_olam 17

Friday 9 December 2011 5:28

based on ur logic: being a homeless bum isnt so bad, you could be a terminally ill three legged pony who is constantly getting verbally abused.

TJ_fml 0

Friday 20 February 2009 0:40

Try using a couple of bottles of fabreeze?

Gho5tk3y 17

Saturday 28 September 2013 9:36

Hopefully the school will pay for the windshield and a hardcore cleaning.

marti_fml 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 18:44

Really bad

writerajere 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:23

I could be worse, have you ever been in a car that hit a skunk. There's not a thing you can do to get rid of the smell and your only option is to sell it at a lose.