Today, I heard my neighbors having a violent argument in their front yard. I listened in, and soon found out why the wife wasn't happy with her husband. Apparently, she had caught her husband peeking through my windows for the second time this month. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML
Today, I heard screaming coming from my neighbor's house. Since her husband has a history of abusing her, I called the cops. After they left with him in custody, she called to yell at me because they were "working things out" after "having a few drinks". FML
Today, I decided to sit on the back porch for a while to enjoy the nice weather and relax. Unfortunately, one of my neighbors was outside too, having a very loud argument with his wife for about 45 minutes. FML
Today, I found out that my shower area is in direct view from my neighbours' balcony. I realised this when I caught my neighbour and his wife watching me while I was getting dressed. I've been living here for 7 years. FML
Today, I found out that I bought a house next door to crazy people. She asked me if I would mind not showering when her husband is at home, because he can hear me and knowing I’m naked on the other side of the wall turns him on, which is a nuisance for her. He’s unemployed. He’s always at home, the creep. FML
Today, I had my window open while playing my Xbox when my angry neighbour came over and kicked my ass for spying on his wife in the shower. Apparently, my room is opposite their bathroom, but my TV faces the opposite way, so I wasn’t even facing the right direction to be spying. Plus, his wife is ugly. FML
Today, I heard my downstairs neighbor being beaten by her husband. I anonymously called 911, hoping to help. She must've seen me giving the cops my statement because as soon as they left, she knocked on my door and punched me square in the face while screaming, "Mind your own business bitch!" FML
Today, and since we moved on base, my neighbor’s wife has tried to have an affair with me. I got tired of it and told him. He blew smoke. I found out she’s in a cheating wife’s club, who all defend each other. She proclaimed to all our neighbors that I’m a predator and I'd attacked her. They believe her instead of my wife, who saw everything. FML
Today, I drove home from work, only to find both my next-door neighbours loudly arguing in the middle of my driveway. I got out and asked them what the hell was going on, only to find out one of their inbred kids had put a brick through my back window, and each is claiming the other did it. FML
Today, my neighbor yelled “Fuck you!” at me through his window. My crime? Closing my front door “too loud.” This man lets his children beat on the walls and slam doors but apparently I’m the problem. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ospeth 4
Hahaha. Wave at him!
DocBastard 40
This is a better way to find out than the alternative: OP: Hi I'm your new neighbour! Man: I know. Nice pink panties you had on last night. OP: Wha...what? Man: Uh, I said nice to meet you.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (84)
SkoomaKi 28
Save up OP! You're going to need to buy a guard dog.
staymintyfresh 13
The worst part of this fml was that people were arguing on the front lawn...that's just sooo unclassy.
Tthug 34
I feel like the fact she's getting creeped by her (married) neighbor is just a slight bit more disturbing than that they were talking about it in their front yard.
wlddog 14
Yeah but arguing in the front lawn,,,, just tacky.
SpicyDuck 22
The best part is she only actually caught him 2 times. Imagine how many times he actually did it!!
mjoyn98 1
You eavesdrop, he peeks. It all evens out in the end.
llamafish 25
At you, or at your husband?
cheetahbaby96 8
Ahaha take it as a compliment!
Eiregal2 10
noor,more more noor!! °_° lol
OffToTheGayBar 9
Curtains and blinds rock my proverbial socks. They can rock yours too, if you give them the chance. :3
DarkHelmet 10
He was admiring yooouuur...furniture..yeah that's it; your furniture. No cause for alarm
rooney0710 5
Wear extra layers so he gets his hopes up alot. "here they go.... Oh... Here they go again....naw..."
Minna_fml 14
Your comment is a win.
mandadarling 10
pics or it didnt happen..