By Gassy - 21/09/2015 14:45 - Australia - Rydalmere

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 349
You deserved it 3 274
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Top comments

chuchusheep 19

this is, hands down, the best FML i have ever read. so awesome.

820 14
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randomname98 22

At least you have a built in defense system!

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Comments

GreatWhiteBrow 8

That's neither a YDI or a YLS. That's too awesome.

2 2
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randomname98 22

At least you have a built in defense system!

605 3
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xninix_fml 36

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
2 50
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Anti_Sora 31

14, he wanted to edit it so it was better.

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xninix_fml 36

@54 Oh. I thought the original comment was good, but anyways sorry for asking :(

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MrsDruidess 23

a better one in the future would be not going outside to check on the noise. You just start filling the kitchen table with guns, cleaning equipment and a 6 pack ;-)

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randomname98 22

I didn't change my original comment at all

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brenton490 19

I thought chemical warfare was illegal now?

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StiffPvtParts 43

I agree! OP should fully embrace her new superpower.

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TeenieRee_2032 27

Prowler sentenced to the Gas Chamber for his crimes. Ha!

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JKPwnage 27

Something something nazi that coming

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bwinski 19

@81 I think you meant " I did Nazi see that coming"

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chuchusheep 19

this is, hands down, the best FML i have ever read. so awesome.

820 14
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Rynardhell 20

My hands have never been as fast as they were when I favorited this.

41 3
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Sandman2015 12

Hey the important part is you are safe. Gassed em away!

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NakuEh 27

That's the same thing Pumba does in The Lion King.

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yea_its_me123 13

Instead of him stealing from you, your farts stole his breath away

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abbigalerose 11

Best. FML. Ever

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Anti_Sora 31

I guess you had a night of good luck. Also congratulations!

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ruttles 16

Pretty sure this is the greatest thing I've ever heard.

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