By Gassy - 21/09/2015 14:45 - Australia - Rydalmere

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 308
You deserved it 3 267

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Top comments

this is, hands down, the best FML i have ever read. so awesome.

At least you have a built in defense system!

Comments

That's neither a YDI or a YLS. That's too awesome.

At least you have a built in defense system!

xninix_fml 36

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

14, he wanted to edit it so it was better.

xninix_fml 36

@54 Oh. I thought the original comment was good, but anyways sorry for asking :(

a better one in the future would be not going outside to check on the noise. You just start filling the kitchen table with guns, cleaning equipment and a 6 pack ;-)

I didn't change my original comment at all

I thought chemical warfare was illegal now?

StiffPvtParts 43

I agree! OP should fully embrace her new superpower.

Prowler sentenced to the Gas Chamber for his crimes. Ha!

Something something nazi that coming

@81 I think you meant " I did Nazi see that coming"

this is, hands down, the best FML i have ever read. so awesome.

My hands have never been as fast as they were when I favorited this.

Sandman2015 12

Hey the important part is you are safe. Gassed em away!

NakuEh 27

That's the same thing Pumba does in The Lion King.

Instead of him stealing from you, your farts stole his breath away

Best. FML. Ever

I guess you had a night of good luck. Also congratulations!

Pretty sure this is the greatest thing I've ever heard.