Today, I heard a baby crying while I was walking down the street. I walked around until I found it. In a dumpster. I immediately called the cops, completely freaking out. When the cops came, they pulled the baby out of the dumpster. It was a plastic baby doll. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my class got baby dolls for the week to teach us how to be good parents. After school, I went to the store with my mom with the baby doll. When I got home, I realized that I left the baby doll in a shopping cart. FML
Today, I was found out when I was a baby, I was abandoned in a dumpster. FML
Today, I saw a lady with a stroller in the park. She stopped at the water fountain and got a drink, then left without her baby. I ran to the stroller and started rolling it after her. Two grown men attacked me, accusing me of trying to steal said baby. Turns out it was a baby doll. FML
Today, I found a baby in a cradle on my doorstep. I was shocked that someone would do this, so I picked it up and uncovered the baby. It was actually a rudimentary stink bomb that went off in my face when I uncovered it. FML
Today, I saw a shady looking customer carrying a very suspicious looking baby stroller with a blanket on top of it. Thinking they were shoplifting, I stopped them before they walked out of the store and snatched it. The attachable car seat came off and there really was a baby in there. A real live crying baby. FML
Today, I passed a car, and heard a baby crying in the back seat. It was hot and no one was around. All the doors were locked so I broke it with a rock, cutting my arm and setting the alarm off. Only to find out that it was a realistic baby doll. I have to get 7 stitches and pay for the window. FML
Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML
Today, when I went to pick my kid up from daycare, I found out that he had run away. The rest of my afternoon consisted of me screaming his name, looking for him. I then returned to the daycare center. He thought it would be funny if he hid in the trash. FML
Today, I was babysitting a 5 year old boy. When I was on the phone with my mom, he called 911 and started to cry. When I got off the phone the police were at the door. It turns out that the "emergency" was that the VCR was not working. FML
Today, it was an unusually hot day and I saw one of my friends walking down the street carrying a large bag. I stopped and asked if he needed a ride. When he got in, I noticed a horrible stench. He then told me he'd just been dumpster diving. FML
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Top comments
Aelaena 6
You should have looked inside because if there really was a baby I would have went straight in, not wait for the cops.
redbluegreen 41
You should've checked mate, but your heart's in the right place. I think. If it was a real baby, it could've died between the time you heard it and the time the police came in.
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Comments (342)
theonlyrg13 0
Why would you wait till the police get there to take the baby out? FTBL
ryanpwnzyouz09 0
At least you didn't discover it in a worse way, maybe by kicking the can over just for the hell of it and seeing a baby pop out. I wouldn't even know what to do in that situation.
rixbury 0
Why in the hell did you wait for the cops and not go into the dumpster and get the baby out? Or help it? Unbelievable. You are a moron, and a lazy person.
MechEngineer 0
This is is a country where good Samaritans are often sued by the people they help. If it were a real child, and he had saved it from the dumpster, he would have had his pants sued right off him. He did the right thing. The rest of you are just naive morons.
Safturento 0
How can you not tell the difference between a real baby and a doll?
insomniacdude 0
I think it's a natural reaction to not want to tamper with a crime scene when you get there, in case you accidentally make things worse. It's a natural reaction and the right one. Unless OP knew specifically that the baby was in immediate danger, he or she could have made it significantly worse by adding to health concerns. Say the baby had a broken neck? The mere act of jumping in could have been enough to ensure the baby's death. The fact of the matter is that unless you know all the details of a situation, you shouldn't just jump in. OP made the right call in being cautious, and ended up looking like an idiot. Unfortunate, but absolutely the right call.
andrew288 0
Wow, only someone really slow could do that.
intensitykills 0
You are a stupid freak. YDI
lakeylove 0
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Is wittle baby in bwig dumpiester
sweetfifteen 0
Wow you're stupid dE