Today, I heard a baby crying while I was walking down the street. I walked around until I found it. In a dumpster. I immediately called the cops, completely freaking out. When the cops came, they pulled the baby out of the dumpster. It was a plastic baby doll. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Baby steps
Today, my class got baby dolls for the week to teach us how to be good parents. After school, I went to the store with my mom with the baby doll. When I got home, I realized that I left the baby doll in a shopping cart. FML
Smooth delivery
Today, I was found out when I was a baby, I was abandoned in a dumpster. FML
Get back here!
Today, I saw a lady with a stroller in the park. She stopped at the water fountain and got a drink, then left without her baby. I ran to the stroller and started rolling it after her. Two grown men attacked me, accusing me of trying to steal said baby. Turns out it was a baby doll. FML
Abandoned
Today, I found a baby in a cradle on my doorstep. I was shocked that someone would do this, so I picked it up and uncovered the baby. It was actually a rudimentary stink bomb that went off in my face when I uncovered it. FML
Mall cop
Today, I saw a shady looking customer carrying a very suspicious looking baby stroller with a blanket on top of it. Thinking they were shoplifting, I stopped them before they walked out of the store and snatched it. The attachable car seat came off and there really was a baby in there. A real live crying baby. FML
Good samaritan
Today, I passed a car, and heard a baby crying in the back seat. It was hot and no one was around. All the doors were locked so I broke it with a rock, cutting my arm and setting the alarm off. Only to find out that it was a realistic baby doll. I have to get 7 stitches and pay for the window. FML
Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML
Bad boy
Today, when I went to pick my kid up from daycare, I found out that he had run away. The rest of my afternoon consisted of me screaming his name, looking for him. I then returned to the daycare center. He thought it would be funny if he hid in the trash. FML
Today, I was babysitting a 5 year old boy. When I was on the phone with my mom, he called 911 and started to cry. When I got off the phone the police were at the door. It turns out that the "emergency" was that the VCR was not working. FML
Hobbies
Today, it was an unusually hot day and I saw one of my friends walking down the street carrying a large bag. I stopped and asked if he needed a ride. When he got in, I noticed a horrible stench. He then told me he'd just been dumpster diving. FML
Top comments
Aelaena 6
You should have looked inside because if there really was a baby I would have went straight in, not wait for the cops.
redbluegreen 41
You should've checked mate, but your heart's in the right place. I think. If it was a real baby, it could've died between the time you heard it and the time the police came in.
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Comments (342)
genius_man16 1
#123 My ass would have been in that dumpster yesterday if I thought there was a real baby in it. Just because you wouldn't go doesn't mean other people with real morals wouldn't. #133 Are you serious? "If you don't know the details of the situation you shouldn't jump in" "tampering with a crime scene". Is that a joke? You do realize we're talking about a *BABY* and not a dead body right?
Hive_Node 2
Why would you call the cops to pull the baby out? Why wouldn't you pull it out? If it WAS a baby why would you want to leave it in the dumpster any longer? YDI, retard.
Ariel09 0
How do you mistake a real baby for a plastic one? Haha
familyguyfan 0
You're such an idiot: 1) you shouldve double checked 2.) if the crying sounds repetitive then you shouldve known and 3.) it shouldve sound robotic bc not one of those dolls cries sound real
kristina3514 0
I would have jumped in head first for the baby (saying I thouth there was a baby) good job though calling the police. Its sad that we live in a time where u hear crying from a dumpster and you don't think its a doll you assume its a real baby. (Which a lot would do)Just sad!
ohhhhshizzz 0
#159: YOU CAN KILL THE BABY TRYING TO JUMP IN THERE TO SAVE THEM, FUCKTARD. Sorry for the all caps, but sometime I hate reading the comments, because something is brought up over & over again, and answered over and over again. YOU CAN'T JUMP IN TO SAVE THE BABY FOR THESE REASONS: TOO SHORT & COULD KILL THE BABY. Gosh, are y'all idiots. OP: You did the right thing.
rockingclarissa 0
Haha that is ****** up
h0b04L1f3 0
Wow ummm your a damn idiot and a prissy little girl because if you really cared you would have gone sraight in for It but no your too selfish.
Evilbeagle 0
Thank you, #164. If the baby had been tossed in there and had a back injury, jumping in to grab it could have paralyzed it for life. If someone just jumps into the dumpster, shifting the rubbish, it could have crushed or suffocated the baby. This, of course, assuming that the lid was not too heavy to lift in the first place, or the sides weren't too high to climb. But no, everyone wants to be a Superhero and act like five more minutes in a dumpster is going to kill it, because everyone is a Superhero when they are behind a computer screen, y'know. Even though this thankfully turned out to be a doll, the person in question did everything right. I suspect that the people criticizing this person are just doing it because they think they are funny, superior, or simply looking to be nasty.
laughinboy 0
Ur a ****** stupid retard