Health: Today, I have discovered things not to do while drunk. Like shaving...

By WIno - 01/09/2010 02:46 - United States

Today, I have discovered things not to do while drunk. Like shaving my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 281

You deserved it 40 940

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 01/07/2009 06:37 - United States

Today, I learned that shaving my unibrow while drunk/high was a terrible idea. I also learned that one brow looks better than no brow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 972

You deserved it 56 261

By Anonymous - 22/05/2012 10:35 - Philippines

Today, I learned that shaving while feeling upset is a very bad idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 325

You deserved it 6 601

Tree trunks

By AloneAtPerkins - 18/11/2020 13:02 - United States - West Bend

Today, I shaved my legs. It's been so long since I've shaved that my razor broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 688

You deserved it 337

By Taylor - 15/07/2012 14:42 - United States - Eastchester

Today, I shaved my legs for the first time in three weeks. It took half an hour, three disposable razors, and I cut my legs up so badly they look worse then they did when they were hairy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 971

You deserved it 32 869

By yggiz - 29/08/2010 05:02 - United States

Today, I learned to never shave your downstairs when you have the hiccups. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 950

You deserved it 32 013

By Anonymous - 13/05/2009 19:39 - United States

Today, I decided to shave my legs completely to be more confident in my dress. I spent over an hour making sure my legs were perfectly shaved. It wasn't until I had been out awhile that I realized I forgot to shave my armpits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 859

You deserved it 52 290

By Darwin_Award_Winner - 07/06/2012 12:10 - United States - Beaumont

Today, in a drunken state, I decided that it would be a good idea to shave with a pizza cutter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 708

You deserved it 36 296

By DaggerHole - 06/03/2014 14:54 - Australia

Today, I learned the worst part about being dared to shave your ass hair: Stubble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 117

You deserved it 16 459

Your brain on alcohol

By michael - 17/07/2019 12:07

Today, I found out that getting drunk and attempting to shit out the second story window is a very bad idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 2 910

By michael - 14/02/2012 02:55 - United States

Today, I found out that getting drunk and attempting to take a dump out of a second-story window is a very bad idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 191

You deserved it 41 999

schwancy 2

Wednesday 1 September 2010 9:06

Next time shave your legs befor you drink. That way you won't feel the need to do it once you're drunk.

mama2b3 20

Wednesday 1 September 2010 9:03

haha did u miss a spot?

Comments

worldclassrager 39

Saturday 18 January 2014 6:51

It's always best to pass out if drunk...you never know what could happen next...

fiveforfighting 26

Sunday 29 March 2015 11:09

This should have been a given OP. You may be lighter than you think

Keywords

Awkward Love Fire AITA Bikes Scary Transportation Dogs Animals Cats Motherhood Family Covid Miscellaneous Health Birthday Money Wanker Sex Intimacy Lonely Dentist Sadness Abuse Work Ableism Relationship advice Nepotism Relatable Ironic

The Top

Today, I fucked up by clicking on my ex's new partner's stories while deep-diving into their Instagram. Now they know I'm still lurking in the shadows of their social media because they can see who viewed their stories, and I can feel the judgment radiating through the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86

You deserved it 696

CLICK HERE TO SEE THE ILLUSTRATED FMLMeghan's website : http://www.kawaiinot.com/ & http://www.murphypop.com/ If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. Bu...

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

The Top

Today, I realized I’m so lonely that I actually got jealous while watching Shrek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 176

Today, I finally get to go surfing! On my way out, I got a splinter that’s still way too deep to remove, causing me to cancel the surf day and now it really hurts to walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 361

You deserved it 109

Today, I had to cancel a plane ticket to a friend's wedding, because first he gave me the wrong date, after which his fiancée cut me from the guests because of Covid safety. Instead of paying $600 to be in the ceremony, I'm paying $400 to not go anywhere because the ticket could only be partially refunded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 033

You deserved it 98

Today, I told my boss I'm going to quit, after months of being abused, doing meaningless work, and working late every day. I was soon given so many new projects that I didn't even have time to write my resignation letter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 845

You deserved it 5 908

Today, I was so tired, I passed out at work in the middle of a call. All because my neighbor's car alarm kept going off every 3 minutes all through the morning. It was still going when I left for work. If you see a news story in a few days about a whole neighborhood beating a guy to death, that's probably us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 409

You deserved it 1 323

Today, it has been a year and a half since my boyfriend discovered online poker. Annoyed to see him spending every evening playing on his laptop, I threatened him: “Now honey, you have to choose. It’s your poker or me!” Answer: “You are bluffing!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 159

You deserved it 13 058

Same thing different taste

Tree trunks

Your brain on alcohol

Top comments

Comments