Miscellaneous: Today, I had to give my husband a tutorial on how to use jumper...

By MM - 02/02/2012 14:50

Today, I had to give my husband a tutorial on how to use jumper cables. Confused and flustered, he requested written instructions. FML

agreeclassic 25 190

vote type 1 3 672

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By Gahh... - 03/12/2012 05:18 - Canada - Surrey

Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML

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Whatcha up to over there?

By confusedaf - 13/01/2022 02:01

Today, my husband called and said he couldn’t make it home tonight from a party, because his car's battery had died and his friends didn’t have any jumper cables. When I offered to pick him up, he adamantly declined. I offered an Uber. Again, declined, and he got pissed, saying, “Stop worrying so much!” and hung up on me. FML

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By burnnotice - 19/09/2009 14:10 - United States

Today, I was trying to turn on my computer and couldn't. I spent twenty minutes trying to figure out what was wrong when I finally called my husband for help and made him leave work. He came in, looked at the wall, and plugged it back in. The look on his face said it all. FML

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By Anonymous - 08/11/2012 05:49 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my husband surprised me by cooking a romantic dinner. I asked him why the sudden gesture. His response? "The cable was out." FML

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By Jman6295 - 08/01/2012 00:12 - United States

Today, while helping my father build a shelf, I suggested that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggested I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML

agreeclassic 32 026

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By cartrouble - 25/11/2010 03:52 - United States

Today, my car broke down. My boyfriend, who is not too handy, insisted on fixing it. He called me outside and said he was done and started the engine. Moments after rejoicing, it burst into flames. FML

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Itchy butt

By peachezthelette - 27/12/2020 19:58

Today, while at work, I had to explain over the phone to my 33-year-old boyfriend how to use Preparation H. FML

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Rip it up and start again

By Anonymous - 04/05/2022 10:00

Today, I had to borrow my mom’s car to jump-start my battery-dead car. I got everything set up and it worked. Parked my mom’s car back into her spot, went into my car. And turned it off. Now I have to do it all again. FML

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Step by step

By IKEA SUCKS - 22/11/2023 16:00

Today, I attempted to assemble a piece of furniture that boasted "easy, step-by-step instructions." Three hours later, surrounded by mismatched screws and a confusing diagram, I realized the only thing "easy" about it was my decision to ask my dad to come round and assemble it for me. FML

agreeclassic 191

vote type 1 426

Social media is dangerous

By Anonymous - 27/11/2015 12:50 - United States - Ontario

Today, I spent half an hour trying to convince my husband not to re-enact a video he saw online of a guy tying some rope to a running chainsaw, then swinging it around his head. He finally agreed not to do something so stupid. A few hours later, he did it anyway. FML

agreeclassic 24 861

vote type 1 2 636

philitron128 0

Thursday 2 February 2012 18:57

Well this is just shocking.

GoW_Chick 14

Thursday 2 February 2012 19:02

Well this is a first, a man who actually wants to read instructions instead of just winging it, odd.

Comments

ivanhoe4u 3

Thursday 2 February 2012 20:46

Well we know who where's the pants.

Timmeh94 0

Thursday 2 February 2012 20:59

You ment your wife right?

jaycob11 0

Thursday 2 February 2012 21:01

He fails at man hood..

ZielZone 4

Thursday 2 February 2012 21:04

And YOU married this idiot??

Snafuusmc 12

Thursday 2 February 2012 21:16

WHAT? As a man your suppose to know about cars like how to change a tire or oil change! I feel sorry for you....

Clamcreepy 7

Thursday 2 February 2012 21:25

He need to have his man card suspended.

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Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished, I jokingly said, "Who's going to sleep in the wet patch?" He got up and said, "You're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing." It was my first time. FML

agreeclassic 37 621

vote type 1 4 542

Today, I bought a treadmill as part of my goal to get fit for summer. It doesn't look like it's going to get much use, seeing as how I sprained my ankle trying to get it in my doorway. FML

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Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML

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vote type 1 51

Today, during an argument with my fiancé, I threw my engagement ring on the ground. The center stone broke off. Now he's couch surfing, and has sworn that he won't marry me unless I can find the stone. One stupid moment might actually ruin my life. FML

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Today, to settle a bet with a friend, I took an online IQ test twice. The first time, I chose answers at random without reading the questions. The second time, I took it for real. I got a higher score from the random selections than from my serious attempt. FML

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Today, my dog had diarrhea in his cage. While I was carrying his dirty bed downstairs to the washer, he ran by and tripped me. FML

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vote type 1 308