Today, I found out that what my husband meant by "we should try swinging" is "I really want to have sex with this one friend of yours, and if you so much as make eye contact with any guy I'm going to totally flip out and threaten to kill him and you." FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, a "friend" mentioned that my husband was "yummy", then asked if she could "have a turn" with him. I left and went home, outraged. When I told my husband, he couldn't conceal his stupid horny grin, and immediately tried to initiate sex. Pig. FML
Today, my husband’s been dropping hints he wants to open our marriage. When I got home, a couple of his coworkers dropped by "for drinks". They tried to initiate group sex and figured I just needed to be talked into it. I was so mad, I couldn’t throw everyone out fast enough, including him. FML
Today, I found out my husband is a cuck. After explaining that I'm not exactly satisfied in the bedroom, we were thinking of ideas to spice things up. I suggested buying a few toys he could use on me. He immediately got mad, because he wanted me to find other men to screw instead. FML
Today, my husband demanded I delete all my male friends/contacts except family members. All this because I texted one of my male friends, “Happy Birthday! Hope you have a good one.” According to him, “One thing leads to another then next thing you know you both are in bed fucking like rabbits.” FML
Today, my husband was giving marriage advice to a friend, while I eavesdropped. I heard, "You want more sex? Let her see you flirting with other girls. Sophia sees me tease a cashier or some shit, the second we get home, she's putting on sexy lingerie and fucking my brains out. It's magic." FML
Today, I’m worried that swinging might've ruined my marriage. My wife and I both agreed and we very much enjoyed ourselves. The problem is that the other woman rode me like a high intensity thrill ride roller coaster compared to the same old merry go round that is my wife. FML
Today, my insanely jealous wife flipped out and made me promise never to hug any of my female friends or go to lunch with them, ever. It's "cheating." FML
Today, I showed my best friend proof that her husband was sexually harassing me. Now she's refusing to talk to me, and I can't let my own husband out of my sight, for fear that he's going to murder the guy. FML
Today, my husband threw an epic tantrum about how “men are allowed to have female friends”, smashed stuff in the living room, for him to storm out and slam the door, making the house tremble. All I did was tell him that his friendship with his secretary made me uncomfortable. FML
Today, my husband has been texting women to see if he can go out on a date with one of them, just because I’ve befriended his friend and apparently, the movie and food I got with the friend was a first date, so now he wants to get even. FML
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Top comments
LovesSushi 25
Well that sounds healthy...
obnum 19
...what? He sounds like a terrible person
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Comments (138)
jem970 19
I have never understood the concept of "swinging." If you want to sleep around why get married? The tax breaks? If you are married it is that person forever. If you want to still be married and still sleep around more power to you, but my question is why? It doesn't make sense. I really have never understood the reason behind this so if anyone is into this lifestyle then please explain. Now OP, you need to leave this relationship. He is threatening you life! Get out now before he makes good on his threats. For your own safety please leave. I would hate to see your story on the news saying you and your "lover" were murdered in cold blood by your husband over the fact that he wants to be a cheating asshole and do it under the label of "swinging."
rockydify 22
Marriage is about more than sex. As long as both parties agree to having other sexual partners, and as long as there are protections in place (to prevent stds and pregnancy), and only if both partners are completely committed to one another, it can work out. Humans are not monogamous by nature, especially males. From a biological point of view - sleeping around results in a wider genetic pool and more chance of your off-spring surviving. Monogamy is an excellent way to live, however, two people going through life together have a greater chance of making successful offspring. We can choose to ignore biology though!
pmadNess 16
She doesn't need a lover, she just has to make eye contact...
Obey_StudBoii 23
If your going to be "swinging" you both have to be reasonable and open minded, but it sounds to me like he's had a crush on your friend for awhile. He also sounds controlling, and an asshole, and only thinks of himself. Not a healthy relationship, I hope you left him. No one should be in this type of relationship. Hence the reason why some guys (not all) are complete douches.
buddy51 23
OP- I can't say this clearly enough- Bail. Bail out now. This is coming to a flaming horrible end if you don't. This guy isn't doing either swinging or cheating. He's doing bullying and he's manipulating you into a very bad position which leaves you only two options. One is to capitulate. The other is to leave. One crushes you into a little squeaking aching nub of your former self. The other gives you your integrity and a chance to have a relationship that's healthy. I suggest leaving. Now.
jem970 19
Actually he is cheating. He is sleeping with her friend. He just is doing it under the guise of "swinging." I agree that he is being a raging asshat and OP needs to get out but that isn't all he is doing.
Obey_StudBoii 23
I agree with what your saying.
musiciangirl591 16
leave, thats the only advice i can give you and i strongly encourage you take it
DDCA 24
Hypocrisy at its finest.
MakinMills 12
That's so messed up haha
RosenT1990 9
Leave. LEAVE!
Inciter 33
It sounds like he wants a free pass to cheat while expecting you to stay completely faithful to him. If I were you, I'd divorce his ass.
Alastrina_fml 20
Swinging is for couples who are in a healthy relationship and have trust in each other.....it's usually done to introduce a new level of spice in their sex life and it applies to BOTH partners who lay the ground rules. This guy sounds more like a possessive control freak, which is NOT conducive to ANY kind of a swingers relationship. He just wants to boink your friend and has zero consideration for your or your feelings, so if you're not going to dump his ass, don't give in to his selfish, jealous and petty demands.
jem970 19
I get your point. But do you really need to sleep with other people to keep your relationship healthy? I really have never understood this concept and I have never met anyone who can do it. Why do you stayed married if you are no longer happy with one another? If you need to sleep with other people to keep your relationship "healthy" that just seems to be a recipe for disaster in your home life. What if they fall in love with the person they are screwing on friday nights? You end up getting a divorce anyway. What was the point?
monnanon 14
it is a hard concept to grasp for those of us who do not live the lifestyle but i can work i know people it has worked for.
Silent_Thrill 17
I usually don't see it as a way to keep things in the marriage interesting and to keep things working. I see swinging almost as another kink/fetish type thing. Some people like when their significant other is with other people, they like to share while they also get with other people. Then there are cuckold men and the equivalent of that to women. It's just another kink to some, if not most, people. You might not understand why some people like their girlfriends to bathe in chicken nuggets, but they do. Just like you might not understand why people swing, but they understand it. OP's wife is just an asshole who wants to use swinging as a good reason to trick her into letting him screw her friend.
pmadNess 16
He sounds very stable.