Right... I think they should've talked about all aspects.. When you start involving other people it will get complicated, unless you both know what you're getting into.. And have a mutual agreement. She should drop him though, sounds nuts

33, He sounds incredibly controlling. Swinging is when both partners are allowed to have sex with other people and they set ground rules. Therefore no one gets hurt. The husband wants to cheat on OP, tell her he's going to, but if she even looks at a guy she would want to have sex with, she's already been threatened to be killed, along with that guy. OP, I don't believe in divorce unless it is something so horrific that that's the only option, that's safe enough for someone. I think you should strongly think about it.

I completely agree #42.. He's nutty putty to the T. I only mentioned what I did, because, what you say is how it's suppose to be, and I believe OP and her crazy husband should have gotten into more depth about what they were planning, taken it seriously, and responsibly. OP probably didn't think her husband was gunna go psycho though.. Asshole definitely had ulterior motives

i totally agree. swinging can sometimes save a relationship from what i've heard but this is so not healthy. I'm also not for divorce but in this situation i think i'd have to consider it. FYL OP

I think maybe your husband is a douche bag dirt bag ahole just saying

I think it is saying that the husband wants to cheat on the wfie, but the husband can't stand the thought of the wife even having contact with any other man. This is not worded very well.

It's worded fine, you're just an idiot.

Ouch, I am sorry. I was only trying to pitch in, I hope I didn't confuse anybody.

Nope. Just yourself.

Id say a friend is still pretty terrible

True, but it could have been worse

Yes, he could've promised to kill them.. Not just threaten.

3- it can always be worse. What's worse than a sister? Your mother. Not much of a point in saying that it could be worse when it always can.

3- I don't see how who the other person is he wants to **** is overly relevant when you consider he threatened Op with Death in regards to it. :p Like, seriously? Death threats in a relationship? It's as bad as it needs to be for her to leave this asshole, imho. :p

Right!! Tell him to swing on his own all he wants; that you and your lawyer will give him all the permission he wants as soon as he signs on the dotted line. If you don't give him permission, he will anyway, so cut him loose now.

....No it isn't.

It's not cheating if she allows it. He's acting like a child by not just asking what he wants and by refusing her to get (if she would desire it) what he desires.

If its legitimate cheating then a break up has a way to shut that whole thing down.

The point of this FML, 36, is that he only asked to "swing" so that he could get laid. If he wasn't fair in the agreement and basically lied to OP about how it would work, then yes- he cheated. Asking to do it under false pretenses so that his wife wouldn't freak out as badly is just gross.

@78 I did say that he should have just been honest and not demand different rules for the both of them. I'm just saying it's not cheating, either they already had sex with a third and it was ok or they are going to and it's not ok anymore. No act of cheating has happened yet. He lied, he's an asshole, but not a cheating asshole.

Obviously it was not okay if HE already had sex or there wouldn't be an FML posted.