Today, I found out that even though my parents have been married for 21 years, our "family friend," who routinely accompanies us on family vacations, completes their threesome. Everyone in town has known for years, except for me and my older brother. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I just found out that my brother in law and his wife frequent a swingers establishment that me and the wife have visited. Which is OK I suppose (providing we never see each other there) but he told me his parents go there too. FML
Today, my boyfriend let me in on a little family secret. His brothers often swap girlfriends and wives. They insist it’s not weird because the siblings themselves aren’t doing anything together, just the in-laws. It’s still too close for comfort and too weird to ignore. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I introduced our parents to each other, and they seemed to have already met somewhere, so I asked them about it. At first they seemed shifty, then guilty, then admitted everything. They’ve actually known each other for decades as part of the same swingers group. FML
Today, due to my parents divorcing 30 years ago, marrying other people, and giving me a handful of half siblings, I found myself in the uniquely unpleasant situation of walking in on my sister having sex with my brother. (Stop panicking, they’re not blood related to each other, work it out!) FML
Today, I learned that not only is my husband having an affair with my own mother, but my whole family knew. They were keeping it a secret from me for 3 months. FML
Today, my dad's face flushed when I introduced him to my new boyfriend. I live in a small town, and it turns out my dad recognized him. He's the secret child from an affair two decades ago. He's my half-brother. FML
Today, I found out the truth about my parents’ divorce and why our family is so distant. Turns out my dad had an affair with not one, but two of my mom’s sisters. And that my youngest cousin is also my half-sister. FML
Today, I brought my new girlfriend home for dinner. My mom was being unusually quiet, so I thought she was trying to be polite. After dinner, she pulled me aside and asked why I'd never mentioned that my girlfriend had dated my brother. Apparently everyone knew except me. FML
Today, I found out that my husband has been cheating on me with his girl bestie for 4 years. I also found out he's been having threesomes with his male bestie. Both people have been around me and my family this entire time. We've been married for 15 years. Joke's on me. FML
Today, I discovered that my stepbrother has been telling his friends that I'm his girlfriend. FML
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Top comments
Darth_Taco 14
Oh wow...what do you even say to that? Well, when it comes time to leave home, I suggest you and your brother go far away XP.
Smiley_70 22
OK - things like this - you don't need to know about your folks. Best thing is to realise it is their issue to deal with - nothing you can do. Just be glad you haven't walked in on them!
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Comments (146)
MizzCarmellXo 0
disgusting. i guess people don't know the meaning of Marriage anymore. a sacred bond between 2 ppl. and then there are people on here asking what the problem is. If you dont see anything wrong with that, there is something wrong.
LadyAlathia 0
Ugh #34, give the preaching a rest. If "good Christian Americans" can go to Vegas, get drunk, meet a hooker, and get married all in one night, then have it annulled three days later, I think we can drop the whole "Sacred bond of marriage" bullshit.
hellobananas 0
I think we can also drop the whole sacred bond because too many members of America are of different religions. Yes, marriage is a bond, and many people are upset people are trying to change it. I think that marriage is too temporary in ways, and that marriage should still be two people, but including a third person isn't wrong. Actually, if Christian people want to argue it, the Bible includes passages concerning threesomes, and that they can happen under very specific circumstances.
rediscoveringme 0
To #42.. As someone who lives in Vegas, we don't want them either lol...
hattergonemad 10
.... You mean the sacred marriage described in the old testament where a man could have many wives?
greenhawkshare 0
This truly sucks. Obviously it is pretty telling that everyone in town knew about it but was too ashamed to say anything to these boys.
blarney 0
that's pretty gross
tipsy337 0
Your parents are freaky. I'd wanna see who my father is. Also everyone that says that's ok, try to imagine your parents doing a threesome for many years?
diet_otaku 0
honestly? i'd be jealous.
Vasir 2
Are you saying you WANT to know?!
divesh777 0
'elder brother', not 'older brother'....but npz!
LadyAlathia 0
And this isn't an FML, unless you're referring to the kids being the LAST to know about their parent's alternative lifestyle. Having kids doesn't have to put a stop to your sex life, and it's no one's job to monitor the actions of consenting adults.
BenignScientists 0
Oh noes, you parents are sexually liberated ... waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah [/SCM] tssk ... their life, their moral choices, their decision that -I hope- makes them happy.
element01 0
its prolly cuz its none of your business
bgukusa00 0
EWWWWWWWWWWWW ur parents are perverted seriously dude .....