Today, I flew home to Germany to see my wife before I'm deployed, only to find her in bed with another guy. She explained that she wants us to stay together, but she can't take a year without being intimate with someone. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Cravings
Today, I flew home to Germany to see my wife before I'm deployed, only to find her in bed with another guy. She explained that she wants us to stay together, but she can't take a year without being intimate with someone. FML
The single life
Today, my girlfriend of over a year broke up with me while I'm deployed overseas. Her reason why is that she needs "to be alone to better herself." FML
Just Dependa Things
Today, I came home from a one-year Army deployment, only for my wife to tell me she feels claustrophobic with me in the bed. She then asked for a divorce. FML
Today, I'm seven months into a twelve month deployment. I called my fiancée, and she dumped me. The worst part is that two days ago, I re-enlisted to go to a unit an hour away from her house. FML
Really struggling, huh?
Today, after I was on deployment 6000 miles away, and because my wife was struggling pretty bad with work, kids, and taking care of everything on her own, she finally had a breakdown so I came home early to help. I found out she was fucking another Navy dude the whole time. I should've stayed out there. FML
Long distance
Today, I flew to Germany to meet up with a girl that I met in America five months ago and fell in love with. We've been talking every day for five months straight. I get here just for her to tell me that she likes me "like a brother." FML
Proof of love
Today, I flew cross-country to see my girlfriend of three years. Once I got there, she broke up with me. I was supposed to be staying for a month and now I have nowhere to go. FML
Frying pan, meet fire
Today, I got back from an 8 month deployment but rather than being pleased to see me my wife wanted to continue the same argument we were having the day I left. I miss being shot at. FML
Nice welcome
Today, I got back from a six month deployment overseas. My girlfriend of three years couldn't pick me up from the airport because she had an intramural softball game to go to. FML
Today, my girlfriend of almost a year, and to whom I intended to propose on Thanksgiving, dumped me because her husband will be returning from Iraq soon. And he wants to have a "talk" with me. I didn't know she was married. FML
Top comments
rawr9able 4
Pimp slap her for me will ya? People like her piss me off, buy a damn ***** and call it good if you can't handle your man being away for so long.
bluetiger105 0
What a bitch. She didn't even make it for one day, let alone a year. Dump her ass.
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Comments (327)
TheDrifter 24
Might I suggest a logging staging area in the buchenwald? Plenty of freshly disturbed soil around and traffic to hide tracks. With the benefit that in the fall tree planters will plant pretty saplings everywhere to hide everything.
johnnybagodonuts 2
shoot her, it'll solve both of your problems
rick159 12
She is a typical German girl
rawr9able 4
Go **** yourself, stereotypical douche.
Amandamhw 1
As an army wife, I know being away is very hard but it's totally do-able. My husband has been away twice and I've always stayed faithful! I'm sorry you have to go through this, you have enough on your plate. She is very selfish.
lowshadows 21
Nice to know you're a devoted wife, it's women like you that gives us a reason to come home.
InvisibleReign 0
dude do the right thing and send her pic all over the Internet and destroy her future
mismonroe 0
You chose a winner, I've been through 2 deployments, and about 99 ******. It's doable. Giggety.
mismonroe 0
Where's bayern? We're stationed in Schweinfurt.
mismonroe 0
Well by ***** I more often mean vibrator. Seriously, though, there should be a warning "excessive daily use QUICKLY diminishes life span of device". Or maybe I shouldn't grow so attached and just assume my pussy pleaser will live forever........
pan1cked 0
my hubby is deployed right bow and my little vibe has gone through 6 sets of batteries hahaha seriously though, we probably do need one that plugs in.
MuchDance90s 0
There are sex toys that use a base that plugs into the wall; the toy sits on the base and charges (like a phone) while not in use. The base is about $30 and the toys run $80 to $100. Theyre not cheap. My friend has one and showed me; it appears to be very good quality. And you can interchange the toys.
MuchDance90s 0
the company is called Fun Factory
medicranger 1
can't even have waited until you were gone.... she's a bitch
Drigr 9
the more boners changes his pic the more I dislike his comments... and he used to be one of my faves..
PapaCool_fml 0
She doesnt like your **** as much as she does his one, but his one doesnt come with soliders wallet. Look at the bright side-u will have son up to 7 months old by the time u come back, just 2 to wait to help her with giving birth !
SteelCladAngel 0
what a cow although masturbation isn't as emotionally satisfying as being with your SO it can be just as, if not more satisfying than being with your SO. my husband and I aren't often sexually intimate ((which sucks for me 'cause I like marathon do it 'till you're sore sex lol)) so I just **********. we've gone six months without and we /live/ together :-/
SteelCladAngel 0
lol he doesn't watch **** he's just a ******* prude. I'm working on him though ;) plus I was fat and pregnant during those 6 months.