and the roomate seems to always win!

This is why bros should be roommates with bros. We understand each other.

Op, your roommate possibly has a thing for you & is trying to scare away all the competition.

Dude, I think you need a new roommate. That's fucking brutal. Even I know cockblocking is a HUGE no-no.

roommate volunteered for replacement pussy imho

yup, op lost his chance at a threesome. probably never going to get that chance again.

big orgy?

I agree, I'm pretty sure your roommate has a thing for you..next thing you know you will be going out with her.

I'm pretty sure she would have left even more quickly if it HAD been a guy.

Even if it was your male housemate, if you have one, he would've tried to get with her. Either way, you're f**ked...

#32 that is sexist at so many levels.

You realise she's making puns?

Excuse me, I couldn't see that. Even if it was a pun, it was really idiotic.

I saw the puns and salute the attempt, but it didn't quite work.

40- Exactly. The thumbs will take care of it. No need to insult her twice about it.

I don't know I thought that was quite clever... :D

I thought the "tri" part was pretty funny, so kudos on that.

"please just one more time mommy?"

#2 is beyond bad. Learn to make jokes or stfu

This might not work. The guy could agree to the threesome...

Two guys one girl threesome? most guys I know would probably decline

Yep, it's usually one penis allowed per fantasy.

its not gay, if its in a three way .

With a honey in the middle there's some leeway

I had a two guy threesome

#59: NO ONE CARES!

#62...lol... pic and comment are perfect together

Also #39, it's not gay if balls don't touch. (If you understand that reference you're awesome).

95 beat me to it :(

With a lady in the middle there's some leeway!

balls touched ohps

59- you might want to get tested

euglps?

He probably isn't attracted to his roommate. Why would he date her?

But sometimes it's oh so worth it.

I'm sorry but what the fuck is asexual

Asexual means to be nonsexual, or lack a sexual orientation.

Scientifically, asexual characterizes an organism that has the organs to reproduce with itself.

It characterizes a type of reproduction or generation in that context. When it characterizes an organism, it typically takes the former meaning.

#52 Isn't that called marriage?

I agree

Agreed. Even if there was a chance they would've dated before, it disappeared when she pulled that shit.

It's possible that the girl was embarrassed, which is why she hauled ass out of there.

Eh. I think it's hilarious. Roommate prank wars are the best.

#11 That's true. If it was me, I would text him when I got home and asked about it.

No it's not hilarious #19. It's stupid and really fucking rude.

31, we clearly have different expectations from roommates. Let's just agree to disagree.

#66 you expect a roommate to sabotage your love/sex life?

#69 I know I do. But the only time I had roommates was in the military. So maybe real life people do things differently.

Chill out people. Think about it like this when you get hurt you'd expect a friend to ask if you're alright, but you'd expect a best friend to laugh until they cried. The closer you are to someone the more you expect them to try to screw with you that's life and that's friendship. So yes I'd be expecting a roommate to screw around with my head because let's face it who's closer than someone that knows your bad habits and still chooses to live with you.

I've heard "Would you like to come up for coffee?" Is a euphemism for "let's have sex". Sorry if I have that wrong, or if anyone doesn't get it.

I still kind of wonder WHY my first comment's getting down voted

Ha!