Health: Today, I discovered my brother likes to use our kitchen utensils... - FML

By utensils123 - 09/02/2010 06:40 - Australia

Today, I discovered my brother likes to use our kitchen utensils to scratch his private areas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 342

You deserved it 2 318

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/05/2012 01:24 - United States

Today, I found out that my little brother has been rubbing my toothbrush in dog shit for the last month because I accidentally broke one of his toys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 456

You deserved it 4 674

By mr.palendrome - 06/03/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 430

You deserved it 28 100

Weird dude of the day

By Anonymous - 30/06/2017 02:00

Today, I caught my 29 year-old brother-in-law scratching his poison ivy with a handful of forks before putting them back in the drawer. I called him on it and he huffed, "You've never said anything before." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 904

You deserved it 337

By Waitingtomoveout - 12/01/2017 17:09

Today, I had to remove my brother's pubic hairs from the bathtub before bathing my son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 407

You deserved it 763

By oh for f*cks sake - 20/03/2017 12:00 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, my baby brother learned to remove his nappy. He immediately used this new skill to shit all over my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 819

You deserved it 410

By who wants spaghetti - 17/12/2015 03:42 - United States - Oconomowoc

Today, during a family dinner, I witnessed my younger brother casually slip his hand down the back of his pants, take it out, sniff each finger individually, before stirring his hand in his spaghetti and continue to eat normally. I was the only one who saw this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 876

You deserved it 1 554

By smells like ass - 29/12/2016 03:05

Today, my brother tried to ninja-kick his dirty underwear up into his hand. He failed and it landed on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 037

You deserved it 415

Sharing is caring

By Eddie - 07/03/2021 23:00

Today, I caught my sister using my shaver to trim her pubic hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 975

You deserved it 118

By Picky - 06/07/2017 14:58

Today, I woke up to my younger brother picking his nose with my fingers. His explanation? "You were sleeping." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 060

You deserved it 369

Classy.

By klifestyle2012 - 12/11/2017 19:00

Today, I came home to find my brother making out with my girlfriend while taking a selfie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 127

You deserved it 330

Next

Top comments

blaaaaakely 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 12:02

crabs for dinner

thrice324 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 12:03

Use his toothbrush as a *****.

Comments

Peroxide 3

Tuesday 9 February 2010 13:03

So thats what the sporks for. Half fork, half spoon, half ball scratcher. DO NOT QUESTION MY MATHS!

TehFuzzyOne 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 13:53

lawl. that is all i can say.

Zills 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 13:05

#18 ftw

Twi_lover_EC 6

Tuesday 9 February 2010 13:10

Ewwwww! I would seriously mess my brother up if he did that!

zuuzuu_fml 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 13:57

thats discusting!!

pride90 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 14:07

disgusting as hell... man some ppl are just.. nastyyy yuckkk

mekarski1008 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 14:11

Don't ask wat the wisk is for. xD

youngmikeeee 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 14:19

Damn, what a dirtball..... CRABS anyone?

mzhonesty 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 14:41

You know, up until I came on this site, I never expected people to be this disgusting. This is why I will put all of my kitchen utensils in a locked cabinet.

danielle8D 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 7:49

thats actually not a bad idea. OP, do this and see if it helps :D

perdix 29

Tuesday 9 February 2010 14:49

You Aussies eat Vegemite, so I don't know how you can tell the difference between that and your brother's smegma.

perdix 29

Tuesday 9 February 2010 15:31

Yeast extract is just a euphemism for the scum that remains after beer is processed. Another euphemism: beef by-products = cow lips and assholes. Bon appetit!

Ajjas013 6

Tuesday 9 February 2010 17:03

You lost me again perdix...

chasin_butterfli 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 15:05

I believe I'll skip dinner at your house.

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