Money: Today, I didn't realize until I was home that I'd thrown my retainer... - FML

By idgit42 - 27/07/2010 22:15 - United States

Today, I didn't realize until I was home that I'd thrown my retainer away with my tray at Chick-fil-A. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 741

You deserved it 30 342

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By pplsuck - 25/09/2012 23:57 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 312

You deserved it 2 774

By stephiexbabexx - 15/01/2010 21:27 - United States

Today, I was with my friends at Burger King. While we were eating, I placed my cellphone on the tray, not realising that I'd left it there until after I emptied my tray into the bin. When I got it out of the trash, it was covered in soggy, sticky garbage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 822

You deserved it 39 453

By Eyalsh - 30/01/2015 04:53 - Germany - Greifswald

Today, I came back to my dormitory after a long shift at work. After using the toilet, I looked at myself in the mirror, only to find a huge piece of food stuck between my front teeth. I work at one of the fanciest restaurants in town; nobody bothered to tell me anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 399

You deserved it 2 799

Moist

By HonestlyVirgoHonesty - 01/05/2022 14:00

Today, I went to go soak my dentures because I fell asleep wearing them last night, only to find that my boyfriend threw away the container they were in, thinking it was trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 858

You deserved it 97

Sticky situation

By CodyS - 03/09/2013 05:03 - United States - Rocky River

Today, on my lunch break, I ran to the gas station, and threw some trash away on my way in. On my way out, I realized my keys were missing. Thinking I threw them away, and fearing that I'd be late returning to work, I tore through the disgusting trash only to find my keys on the seat of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 212

You deserved it 11 277

Brainrot

By queenbee12345678 - 19/02/2012 19:29 - United States

Today, I accidentally left my cell phone at the restaurant. When I realized my mistake, I went back to see if anyone had found it. They said no, so I gave them my number to call if it turned up. I realized later that I'd given them my cell phone number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 967

You deserved it 26 482

By Tired Hungry Geek - 27/10/2015 04:40 - United States

Today, I was exhausted after a long day at work and didn't feel like cooking so I went to a drive thru. I placed my order, went to the window and paid. I then drove off without my food and didn't realize it for a couple of blocks. I was too embarrassed to go back and get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 672

You deserved it 10 318

By Anonymous - 05/10/2011 05:28 - United States

Today, a woman somehow managed to drop her wedding ring into the garbage at the fast food place where I work. I had to search through a full bag of half eaten food and soda to find it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 327

You deserved it 2 733

By Fox_Undercover - 30/04/2016 20:33 - United States - Wareham

Today, my dentist pulled the wrong tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 438

You deserved it 2 953

Introvert struggles

By knife knife - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Dalkeith

Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 910

You deserved it 15 435

Next

Top comments

SirWhatsHisFace 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 2:00

What is this OP, a rap? The last part of the FML ryhmes.

Vehicle 1

Wednesday 28 July 2010 2:04

I've been without braces for several years and I quit wearing my retainers like I was supposed to and my teeth are fine.

Comments

sidekick6 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:04

throw my retainer away, with my tray at chick fil a. haha. that rhymes.

aleexxisssXO 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:13

sucks :)

Lottie5490 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:23

My BFF's cleaning lady threw mine away once and I had to go digging in a State Senator's dumpster to find it. The bottom was broken in half, but I still had to clean it and wear it until I could get a new one...ick!

stillxsearching 3

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:24

not an FML, more like a right of passage. everyone throws out at least one retainer. i probably threw away like 5 when i was a kid. everyone does it. it's part of growing up!

xXxbiancaxXx 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:24

sux

metalr82 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:35

who cares!!!

bthecolorful 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:41

ahh! i did that once, at a burger place. we drove all the way back, and i had to put on some gloves&dig through the trash. all that mayo,mustard,and other sandwich leftovers was just greatt. its been over a month and i havent had a burger since.

Summer17 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:41

I'm pretty sure you life isn't ****** because you threw away your retainer. stop bitchin, get back in the kitchen.

the_flirtt 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:16

ouch !!

epr 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:17

Whoa.

the_flirtt 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:33

epr are u offended ?

epr 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:41

No, I thought that was funny.

the_flirtt 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:49

wow Selena ur cool

epr 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:51

Kay, yeah. That was kind of stupid.

the_flirtt 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:54

hey let's be nice :}

epr 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:55

I sowwy. Cookadee?

the_flirtt 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:59

cookadee ?

epr 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 5:09

Cookie* :(

the_flirtt 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 5:14

oh hah I see lol

JesseJaymz 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:41

at least you rhymed today

angelkey2myheart 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:49

that sucks! my parents bought me my retainers twice almost 1000 bucks because my dog chewed them up. that definitely sucks

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

Keywords

Video games Annoying Gamers Relatable Abuse Birthday Scams Social Media Money School Kids Education Parents Public freakouts Health Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Bikes Cops Transportation Fight Family Customers Work Gross

The Top

Today, I set aside a weekend to spend time with a friend. I learned that someone else is staying there: a fat, unemployed man-child who talks shit about us on Facebook, while his manipulative wife pays his bills. He got evicted from his last home when he pretended to be a ninja and cut up his neighbor's garden. FML

I agree, your life sucks 326

You deserved it 68

Today, I came home from college to find my favorite silk nightie that I'd left behind being modeled by Bernie, the family dog. Nobody will admit to who put it on him. I don't know what's worse, that my family is a bunch of assholes, or that my nightie is big enough to fit a Saint Bernard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 308

You deserved it 3 970

The Top

Today, I had to use my driver's license to convince the security guard at a game room that I was a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 021

You deserved it 5 189

Today, my doctor called and asked me when I could have my broken hand x-rayed again. I said the ER staff had told me it was a bad sprain over two weeks ago. I'm now in a full cast, and have to have my partially healed bones re-broken. There goes my summer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 926

You deserved it 2 835

Today, I had a seizure in class. Being an epileptic, I had warned my professor of the possibility that I could have one in class. She was understanding and seemed very concerned about my issue at the time. After I had the seizure, however, she asked me if I had ever tried exorcism. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 506

You deserved it 2 879

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to mix it up and find a good place outdoors to have fun. After an hour of climbing up a rocky mountainside to a completely isolated clearing, out of the way of any hiking path, he was still so paranoid that he finished within 20 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 437

You deserved it 2 158

Today, I was finally alone for the first time in a year. I thought I'd go to a restaurant, but ended up getting there before they opened. While waiting, I listened to music, only to end up crying for several minutes because I haven't had a girlfriend since 2010, and never will again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 672

You deserved it 248

Today, someone tried to scam me by selling me a ticket to a Chris Cornell concert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 745

You deserved it 96