Today, I caught my roommate trying to use my flashlight as a dildo. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
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Today, I walked in on my roommate with her ass cheeks spread wide, and her friend ripping a strip of wax off of her while wearing a headlamp flashlight to see if she "got it all". FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate whacking off to clown porn. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom in the bathroom, washing a dildo. FML
Spyware
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Everything was going great until I noticed a small blinking light on my shelf. It turns out that it was a camera. My mom put it there to make sure I cleaned my room. She saw the whole thing. FML
Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML
WTF roomie?
Today, I walked into my dorm room, only to witness my roommate shaving her vag over my trashcan. FML
Today, I found out my mom sleeps in my room when I'm at college during the week. I discovered this my bumping into her dildo with my foot. FML
Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML
Today, for 20 minutes, I watched my girlfriend use a mini flashlight to look for her keys in her purse. The flashlight was on her key chain. As were her keys. FML
How very dare you?
Today, I came home from work and found my sister using my vibrator in my own bed. FML
Top comments
perdix 29
She's not too bright, is she?
ticktockbaboom 6
Hey, times are tough
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Comments (143)
blargblah 12
Now you know what to get her for christmas!
lanco_fml 10
the awkward moment when the powers out and you catch a glimpse of your flashlight before it disappears then reappears
azularayne 17
At least she wasn't using your silverware? haha
cho_bee 9
Was the light on or off?
Daydreamer4466 6
I hope your room mate is a girl and not a boy the would very strange.
RiessBaby 6
hahaha oh gosh. i would have died laughing. nasty but so desperate its hilarious!!! poor girl just needs the D!
xAngelShadow 2
I hope your roommate is a girl.
moontunes 5
I wouldn't use it again if I were you.
JonDipple 6
Should see if you could help each other out ;p
Arlisshsr 9
Well thats not a bright idea...