Today, I came home to my empty apartment. My girlfriend had left a note on the floor that said: "Took my stuff and left. Took your stuff and pawned it." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got home and found all my things thrown out into the yard, including the stuff from my mancave, which I spent thousands of dollars on. Apparently, my girlfriend stopped for a visit while my wife was home. I’d stupidly given her a key. Turns out my wife called out sick today. FML
Today, my roommate of a year and good friend of several more decided to move out. When I came home from a long work shift, I found all the cupboards emptied out of everything, including all the new stuff I bought to replace what she was going to take with her. FML
Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read, "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after a year of living together. She told me that she met someone else and wanted to move out. She moved out... but moved her things into my roommate's bedroom. FML
Today, I was sleeping in after working a graveyard shift. I awoke to my girlfriend sneaking her stuff out of the house. She planned on leaving her key on my pillow and taking off without any notice whatsoever. FML
Today, my girlfriend called me and told me she "had a surprise for me when I got home" in a sexy voice. So I hurried home, only to find a note saying she left me and took my dog. Deeply depressed, I went into the living room. She took my TV also. FML
Today, my boyfriend moved out and took all his things with him. He also took some things that didn't belong to him, namely my rent money. My landlord comes tomorrow. FML
Today, my girlfriend did the whole "break up with your boyfriend and kick him out of the house" thing from the movies. Except it's my house. She kept my stuff. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend moved out. I came back to a sparsely furnished home; she'd even taken the shower head, my beard trimmer, and the soap from the bathroom. FML
Today, I came back to my apartment after moving most of my stuff out. Upon returning, I learned that my now ex-roommate drank all of my alcohol and threw away my things, thinking that I had forgotten them. FML
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Top comments
SorrowFull 8
Turn her ass in. Theft is theft.
Midrash 5
Send her a text saying "took our naked pic n youtubed it"
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Comments (282)
structuredchaoz 4
Time to call the police.
cajekraze 7
Call Judge Judy
lisaw375 0
did you do something to piss her off?
bexfml 0
wow what a bitch!
Freenow_fml 5
Whatever you did to her, sue her.
PinkFun1969 9
You can so kick her ass with the Law. it's a felony charge to pawn someone stuff that's not yours and in this case stolen;-)
PinkFun1969 9
You can so kick her ass with the Law. it's a felony charge to pawn someone stuff that's not yours and in this case stolen;-)
wrwrestler7 1
Pick up the letter with a glove, and take the letter to the police station. Then explain that she stole all your belongings and offer to show them the empty apartment. If they do not arrest her and make her pay it back, then find a lawyer.
gambatte 0
that's when I would take my foot and put it in her ass
sgress 4
that is theft call the cops and report it. when u sell something to the pawn shop they take ur ID and copy it then the items are held for like 30 day to make sure there not stolen. so if u report it u will get it back. I have had to deal with theft before got my stuff back cause of that.