Today, I broke the glass of the photocopier trying to photocopy my ass. My boss will be here in five hours. She'll know it was me. I'm the only night guardian. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I was at work, nonchalantly spinning my keys around my finger when they flew off and hit a glass cabinet. Broken glass showered passing customers. I don't think I'll have a job to go to tomorrow. FML
Today, I was at work copying some papers. The copier is below a shelf with lots of paper and signage, which suddenly flew off the hinge and hit me in the head as well as the copier. My boss ran in, asking, "Is the copier okay?" FML
Today, I walked into the glass door of my boss’s cabin and broke my spectacles. Thank god for a backup pair, right? Wrong. I fell down the stairs and broke them too. FML
Today, at my new job waitressing, I walked into a glass door at full speed while carrying a tray of drinks. Not only did I spill everything, but I also left a weird make up face print on the glass for everyone to laugh at. FML
Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML
Today, I snuck out of work 2 hours early. As I was speeding away so I wouldn't be seen, I rear-ended my boss as he was leaving the lower parking lot for a late lunch. FML
Today, I thought my house was being broken into in the dead of night. Frightened, I dismounted a floor lamp as a makeshift weapon and crept through the house, channelling my inner Ellen Ripley. It turned out to be the wireless printer with a paper jam. FML
Today, I replaced a usually fun collegue's picture of his kids with a picture of my face against glass, so it looked I was inside the screen. Everyone laughed, but he reported me because I tried to "erase his children" and "if anything happens to them" it's now my fault. FML
Today, my boss "borrowed" my prescription sunglasses off my desk. She crashed her car because they made her dizzy, and thinks I should pay for the damages. FML
Today, my psycho boss snatched a file from my hand so aggressively that I got a papercut. She then scolded me for bleeding on the papers. FML
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Top comments
littlepirate_fml 0
Just tell your boss you wanted to photocopy your ass. That's like... totally normal. SERIOUSLY!
0___0 9
Blame it on a customer. There's probably security cameras... shit. DENY, DENY, DENY!
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Comments (81)
phillynena 0
Oddly it's a proven statistic that approximately 75% of photocopy machine damages are due to people sitting on them and photocopying their butts. Take some comfort in knowing that you haven't been the first to do so.
ShadowlessSpear 21
Or the last to do so.
Polka_Dots 0
QUALITY lol lol
Zoomuck 0
Maybe it's a sign
crider1996 0
For what?
mrs_bruno_mars 14
Time to lose weight, smart one.
there_I_said_it 0
Well played sir. Well played. Did u at least get ur photocopy?
hotrod926 0
Oh, man! Fyl indeed
Eaglestrike117 29
Night Guardian? Are you a superhero? I think you meant night guard.
indu54 0
LMFAOOOOOO!!!!!! oh 21 youre the first to make me laugh in forever
mrwelsh3 0
haha that's what I was thinking
mrwelsh3 0
that's what I was thinking lol
BellaBoo8275 1
is there a difference?
fixer 0
As they say, "look before you leap". You just jumped into the Grand Canyon, blindfolded.
I_iz_epic 0
If you wanted a picture so bad you could at least use a camera :|
imblue 0
Tell your boss the glass cut your balls and threaten to sue. :)
xXxFML 0
21= win