Love: Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into...

KAAALIS 16 March 2009, 02:20 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

1224 comments

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Same thing different taste

Anonymous 18 February 2014, 19:49 Kingshill, Virgin Islands, U.S. 🌶️ Spicy

Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, he started sucking on my breast. He ended up popping a pimple on it into his mouth. He threw up and that, as they say, was the end of that. FML

174 comments

Anonymous 18 February 2013, 19:11 Toronto, Canada

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

99 comments

>{%£•¥ 27 November 2010, 07:08 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, right before my boyfriend and I were about to have sex, he touched his butt and says, "Oh I have a butt pimple." He then went and popped it. FML

63 comments

svet 22 February 2009, 02:07 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Squirting the night away

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob, which I don't normally do because I have a fear of getting hit in the eye. Afterwards, I went to suck a lemon to get the taste out of my mouth. Sure enough, I bit the wrong spot and had lemon juice shoot right into my eye. FML

175 comments

Anonymous 23 October 2020, 08:08 London, United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy

Great expectations

Today, after making love to my boyfriend, I went upstairs to shower. After turning it on, I found a huge pimple on my leg and the prospect of popping it excited me more than my boyfriend ever had in bed. FML

7 comments

fmlpanda 29 May 2010, 04:14 United States

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. It was going well until our braces got caught. Out of pain, I tried to pull away, which made my eyes water. Then I sneezed in his mouth. FML

192 comments

Mirroronthewall 30 August 2009, 15:22 Canada

Multitasking

Today, I was brushing my teeth in my bathroom. As I looked in the mirror, I spotted a zit on my forehead. Keeping my toothbrush in my mouth, I quickly leaned in towards the mirror to pop the pimple, meanwhile lodging my toothbrush down my throat. I temporarily can't talk. FML

125 comments

NotsexyEnough 23 November 2009, 03:06 United States 🌶️ Spicy

A for effort

Today, my boyfriend tried to be sexy and take off my clothes with his teeth. He ended up biting my leg. FML

56 comments

Anonymous 25 August 2023, 04:00

I'M SORRY!

Today, I got back at my boyfriend for sticking the hoover nozzle in my mouth as a prank by doing the exact same thing to him. Unfortunately, it must have burst a blood vessel in his lip because it swelled right up and his entire lower jaw on the right side is just one massive bruise. FML

1 comment

TheGirl This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff United States

Language of love

Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML

67 comments

brittbaybiee 0

16 March 2009, 12:05

ewww

alley_cat_118 0

16 March 2009, 12:29

#5: many guys (myself included) dig neck-biting without being vampires. #9: it doesn't take much to pop a pimple if it's already near bursting. Everyone else: you're absolutely right, this is beyond disgusting.