Love: Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into... - FML

By KAAALIS - 16/03/2009 02:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 739 045

You deserved it 496 101

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 18/02/2014 19:49 - Virgin Islands, U.S. - Kingshill

Spicy

Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, he started sucking on my breast. He ended up popping a pimple on it into his mouth. He threw up and that, as they say, was the end of that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 358

You deserved it 19 304

By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 19:11 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 103

You deserved it 40 086

By >{%£•¥ - 27/11/2010 07:08 - United States

Spicy

Today, right before my boyfriend and I were about to have sex, he touched his butt and says, "Oh I have a butt pimple." He then went and popped it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 103

You deserved it 4 166

Squirting the night away

By svet - 22/02/2009 02:07 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob, which I don't normally do because I have a fear of getting hit in the eye. Afterwards, I went to suck a lemon to get the taste out of my mouth. Sure enough, I bit the wrong spot and had lemon juice shoot right into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 541

You deserved it 84 326

Great expectations

By Anonymous - 23/10/2020 08:08 - United Kingdom - London

Spicy

Today, after making love to my boyfriend, I went upstairs to shower. After turning it on, I found a huge pimple on my leg and the prospect of popping it excited me more than my boyfriend ever had in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 189

You deserved it 418

By fmlpanda - 29/05/2010 04:14 - United States

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. It was going well until our braces got caught. Out of pain, I tried to pull away, which made my eyes water. Then I sneezed in his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 889

You deserved it 8 382

Multitasking

By Mirroronthewall - 30/08/2009 15:22 - Canada

Today, I was brushing my teeth in my bathroom. As I looked in the mirror, I spotted a zit on my forehead. Keeping my toothbrush in my mouth, I quickly leaned in towards the mirror to pop the pimple, meanwhile lodging my toothbrush down my throat. I temporarily can't talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 772

You deserved it 44 263

A for effort

By NotsexyEnough - 23/11/2009 03:06 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend tried to be sexy and take off my clothes with his teeth. He ended up biting my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 533

You deserved it 6 493

I'M SORRY!

By Anonymous - 25/08/2023 04:00

Today, I got back at my boyfriend for sticking the hoover nozzle in my mouth as a prank by doing the exact same thing to him. Unfortunately, it must have burst a blood vessel in his lip because it swelled right up and his entire lower jaw on the right side is just one massive bruise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 611

Language of love

By TheGirl - 23/11/2009 21:11 - United States

Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 415

You deserved it 3 957

Next

Top comments

brittbaybiee 0

Monday 16 March 2009 12:05

ewww

alley_cat_118 0

Monday 16 March 2009 12:29

#5: many guys (myself included) dig neck-biting without being vampires. #9: it doesn't take much to pop a pimple if it's already near bursting. Everyone else: you're absolutely right, this is beyond disgusting.

Comments

serslybro 20

Tuesday 11 November 2014 7:38

Every time i read this I gag!

kerstileann 26

Wednesday 12 November 2014 23:13

EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW!! also, biting necks hard enough to pop skin- is a big ass no-no.

rossea 21

Monday 17 November 2014 10:18

Eww I think I just vomited a bit..

ohray 17

Tuesday 18 November 2014 15:39

Best FML of all time!

britney26 4

Saturday 22 November 2014 8:44

ewwww? wait why were you biting his neck...?

pookiebear1001 13

Monday 24 November 2014 14:52

Oh lord! That's gross >_

Nightmaremagnet 2

Monday 15 December 2014 6:18

I see an urban dic term in the making

HorrorJr 26

Thursday 1 January 2015 14:30

DUDFGKIGKTGHKN CAN YOU NOT

Amandallynn 9

Wednesday 14 January 2015 13:36

okay? SDI bcoz she knew he was pimply...and did that shyt anyway. Ewwww

G00N3R 19

Friday 16 January 2015 14:12

Nothing quite like good ol' neck ejaculation

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You deserved it 2 353

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You deserved it 7 993

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I agree, your life sucks 1 204

You deserved it 135

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I agree, your life sucks 388

You deserved it 165