Today, I asked my boyfriend what he thinks about long term relationships. He said, "Our relationship is kinda like having a dog. Chances are, your dog is going to die pretty quickly, before you do. Dogs and humans just aren't meant to be together forever." He compared me to a dying dog. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend of over a year said that being in a relationship is pointless. When I responded that I couldn't picture my life without him, he said he couldn't picture his life without our cat. FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years told me that he sees no future with me. It's alright though, because he says we can still "coast along" until he meets someone else. FML
Mr. Robot
Today, my boyfriend said we needed to talk. He called me cruel, cold and heartless and that it’s making him reconsider what kind of future we may have together. All because I hate sappy movies and don’t cry on the scenes where the dogs die. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend of 3 years what he thought about marriage in the future. "Who knows? We might meet other people soon." FML
Today, after calling my boyfriend and telling him that my dog had just died, he hesitated and stuttered, "She was old, sick, and suffering. Babe, it was her time to go." He then informed me he had to go to his friend's house and hung up. My dog was two years-old, in great health, and was hit by a car. FML
Empathy
Today, my boyfriend sent me a bouquet of roses with a message attached. The message said, "Ever since your dog died you've stopped putting out, so I think we should break up." FML
Goddammit, Facebook!
Today, my boyfriend of three years told me he isn't sure about me anymore. He said he saw a quote on Facebook that a guy can be with a girl for 10 years, then leave, and be with a girl for one and marry that girl. Meanwhile, I've been planning on the rest of my life with him in my head. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He now argues that he should keep the dog. We only dated for three months, and I've had the dog since I was ten. FML
Good boy
Today, I realized my boyfriend rather qualifies as a pet: He loves eating, he hardly ever talks or listens, but he is cuddly, always enjoys having me around and can – within limits - be trained to do useful things. FML
Pros and cons
Today, I'm in a relationship with a guy who yells at me everyday for things I didn't do, is in a dead-end job and is not attractive whatsoever, but I can't bring myself to break up with him because he would get to keep the dog. FML
Top comments
TheKitchenSink 0
I have a friend who got compared to ice cream in a breakup. "Girls are like ice cream...you have to try all the flavors before you choose one"
genius_man16 1
Ok, first off, you should dump him. Secondly, does that make any sense to anyone? Maybe i'm just tired but...
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Comments (102)
hollisterhottiex 0
haha give him a little bit of credit, thats a pretty strong metaphor for a guy.. whether it makes sense or not XD
rolling479 0
Wow, that just sucks. I do not agree with holisterhottiex though. Some guys are smart. Some are not like this one for example. Yes, I am a guy, but I am the one of them who knows what he is talking about. Anyway, he is a dumb*** for saying that. I am pretty sure that any girl is worth having, even for a short amount of time.
totalba 0
HES THE DOG. haha just dump him. whatever.
babble 0
I think the reason people "summarize" their FMLs at the end is because so many people in the comments are like, "What?? I don't get it! How is this an FML?" or have some completely weird interpretation about what the "FML" part of it is and judge the OP accordingly.
Isha 0
UMMMM # 40 how is it immroal to date a mentally challenged person? I know you meant to be an insult to the OP but it insults should make sense and not be insulting to a third person.
justjayit 0
Dump him. Regardless of what he compared love to, he still implied that he doesn't want a longterm relationship with you, so he's not serious.
wildflowertia 0
I laughed so hard Im posting it on my facebook. But, that sucks pretty bad.
Banthestrandland 0
Just wanted to remind everyone that even long-term relationships eventually end, unless you have a ludicrously romantic idea of a long-term relationship. Almost all relationships are temporary. Friends fade from view, girlfriends from memory, and even parents sometimes become disappointed and disappoint. Nothing lasts; embrace impermanence. Anyway, I voted FYL, but I don't agree with the OP's little summary at the end. Her boyfriend compared the relationship to a pet dog, not her. No matter how long your dog lives (and it might live a long time--something many seem to be ignoring here), it'll die before you do.
jcue13 0
haha.. maybe you are a female dog.. lol
anon_anon_anon 1
OUCH! You're better off without that jackass.