Holidays: Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized...

By nolinguist - 22/11/2009 17:39 - Austria

Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized that I couldn't understand any "German". Turns out they have a totally different dialect here to anything I was taught in school. I'm here till May. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 312

You deserved it 18 788

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Same thing different taste

Scheiße!

By Xerfox - 03/07/2016 18:05 - Germany - Löwenstein

Today, I found out the German I've been learning for nearly a month is a dialect only spoken by people in a small area of the country. This means I'll need to re-learn most of what I thought I knew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 494

You deserved it 1 973

By traveling - 09/07/2013 11:18

Today, I arrived in Germany for a summer-long stay. The family I'm supposed to stay with had said they spoke fluent English. They don't. I don't speak German. It's going to be a quiet two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 974

You deserved it 6 412

Back home

By Anonymous - 30/12/2012 19:21 - Germany - Neunkirchen

Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 032

You deserved it 5 364

By Anonymous - 01/10/2013 07:30 - Austria - Vienna

Today, I was in an Austrian bar, making polite conversation in my broken German with a slightly odd middle-aged man. He said, winking, that he was near to his pension. I smiled and nodded, thinking he was talking about retirement. My friend later informed me that 'pension' is German for 'apartment'. Ew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 335

You deserved it 4 494

Moving on

By Awesome - 17/08/2011 00:05

Today, I found out that I was moving to Germany. I'm going to be put back a year in school because of the system change. I also don't speak a word of German. Why? Because my mother wants to brag about this experience to her friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 970

You deserved it 2 793

Listen up

By Pfnüselfüsel - 20/07/2023 18:00

Today, my German colleague complained that when I spoke German, I had a Swiss accent in it, which was "not nice to hear". Well Honey, we live in Switzerland, what accent did you expect us to have when you moved here? FML

I agree, your life sucks 999

You deserved it 96

By nullroute - 16/02/2016 11:34 - Switzerland

Today, I found out that while on foreign exchange for over six months now, I have been pronouncing the word for "night" in German wrong. Apparently, this whole time, the way that I have been pronouncing it in German means "naked". This explains a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 141

You deserved it 2 805

By Jan - 27/02/2013 04:50 - United States - Ann Arbor

Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 278

You deserved it 4 320

By lostforwords - 06/08/2011 19:10 - Ireland

Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 075

You deserved it 6 300

By hrmpf - 19/01/2016 14:37 - Germany - Bremen

Today, I went to the hairdresser for the first time in the country I just moved to. Guess I don't speak the language as well as I thought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 988

You deserved it 2 955

allmidnighteyes 10

Sunday 22 November 2009 23:07

"ich liebe meine scheide" just say that everywhere you go

badbunny 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 23:22

remember, the universal language for ordering at a restaraunt is point at the item listed.

Comments

NFL333 0

Saturday 10 April 2010 10:08

better learn quick

drkstr 0

Thursday 13 May 2010 19:24

Ich komme aus Deutschland. Your German must suck if you can't get by in Austria.

partychix246 0

Saturday 31 July 2010 0:21

ya I know right it's weird but you should be able to understand it mostly cuz I understood it cuz I'm fluent in high German and I spent one semester there

muzician 0

Saturday 31 July 2010 23:21

it's not that different really

HockeyDude15 0

Friday 17 December 2010 16:28

everywhere has a different dialect u fag face

angelwing701 0

Friday 25 March 2011 4:46

Ich kann nicht Deutsch sprechen - I can't speak German

BonIfatius 3

Friday 5 August 2011 14:30

haha I'm from Vienna, and even I had troubles understanding them sometimes >.< beautiful region, though :)

cecilk 29

Wednesday 21 September 2011 4:22

Still remember when at home we got satellite TV and could see not only Austrian TV but also German one. Pretty much the first thing I watched was an interview of a German news-show with a farmer from Tyrol (West Austria). They subtitled him. It really depends a lot where in Austria somebody has grown up. In Eastern Austria peoples dialect is a bit closer to Standard German, the farther south or west you are going the heavier the dialect, especially in Alpine valleys. I learned Standard German only in the German-lessons in secondary school, in all other classes we spoke dialect. I have to concentrate to speak it and it sounds rather awkward in my ears.

death_prevails 6

Thursday 29 December 2011 2:01

Eh... Unless you're in some remote mountain village, it's not that difficult to adapt to. Try regional Switzerland (even Zürich doesn't compare to that one)...