Today, I accidentally dropped my cigarette down my shirt. There are now two unsightly, painful burns right in the center of my chest. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I accidentally gave myself a chemical burn. It hurts like hell and I've been told all I can do is wait it out for a few days. The worst part? It's from a reaction to a cream I used all over my chest. I can't wear a shirt without being in immense pain. FML
Today, while sitting at a red light with my window down, the asshat next to me flicked his still-lit cigarette away. It landed in my car and wedged between me and my seat. It burned a hole in my shirt and my seat, and burned my back and hair. FML
Today, as I was walking home late at night, some asshole threw a lit cigarette butt out of their balcony. It fell between my glasses and my eye and left a burn mark on my cheek. FML
Today, I finally found a reason to quit smoking. I threw my cigarette butt out the window and it blew back in, went down the back of my pants, and burnt my butt in 3 different places. FML
Today, I was refilling my lighter. Afterwards, I gave it a test light. I must've spilled some fluid because my thumb caught on fire. FML
Today, I lit a used tissue on fire in my room. Eventually, the fire became kinda of large (it was a big tissue) and when I blew it out, it fell on the carpet. Now I have a burn stain on it. FML
Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML
Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML
Today, I was cooking and I burned my thumb. I had some first-aid burn spray, so I sprayed it on. I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and when I flicked my lighter, my thumb went up in flames. Turns out that first-aid burn spray is flammable. FML
Today, I thought it was a good idea to go number two while smoking a "cigarette". My ash tray was over by the sink so I decided to just ash in the toilet. While ashing between my legs, I sneezed and now I have a extremely uncomfortable burn on my man member. Smoking is bad. FML
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Top comments
FFML_314 11
OP YDI for smoking
keekah 0
Ydi. Don't smoke. It kills you.
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Comments (511)
JGood09 0
Oh boy, here come the YDI for smoking comments, come up with something new ya ******* idiots
Blame_The_Dog 0
Someone is upset because he smoked and looks like he signed up for Jersey Shore but got rejected :(
FFML_314 11
People automatically assume that when somebody says YDI (you deserve it) you're saying they're doing something wrong. I smoke but, I still know OP deserved it because that's what happens, you accept the consequences of your actions. So, honestly it's a legitimate thing to say "ya ******* idiot."
nates0210 0
wait... what's the other burn from? O.o
JGood09 0
I'm just sayin' the last time there was an FML about smoking 95% of the comments were YDI for smoking, it's ******* old ok don't be a bunch of cocksuckers
Blame_The_Dog 0
duuuude, bum me a cig and stop bitchin'
boating_guy 33
how bout thi one then op YDI for being a clutz
Blame_The_Dog 0
Also did you know that 85.7% of statistics are made up? So I've got reason to believe you pulled that 95% thing out of your ass good sir
jjpavo 0
59, whats the point of getting high? no life moron. oh and btw, pics or it didnt happen
JGood09 0
Yea and I believe your too much of an ugly fatass loser to put an actual pic of yourself up talkin about how look, guarantee you I look better than your sorry punk ass. And I don't smoke
Blame_The_Dog 0
LMFAO are you referring to me there entertainer? Someones sad because the only time he gets it in is when he gets girls drunk and slips roofies in their apple martinis. If I had a camera I would embarras you like I'm doing now with these comments. Calm yourself and move out of your moms basement okay frank?
FFML_314 11
JGood, your arrogance is what's irritating. The OP deserved what they got for smoking, get over it, move on and eveything will be ok. You're not all that and never will be.
JGood09 0
Alright fag, I get mine legit cause I'm that good unlike your fatass, don't live in my parents basement cause i have my own place. and the names not frank look it up bitch
fakeking2 0
Oshi retard alert...... means go back to elementary school
Freeze_fml 16
Since it bugs you so much... YDI for smoking. YDI for smoking. YDI for smoking. YDI for smoking. YDI for smoking. YDI for smoking. YDI for smoking. YDI for smoking. YDI for smoking. YDI for smoking.
Blame_The_Dog 0
first of all, kill yourself for thinking I really thought your name was Frank. Second you have no idea what I look like meaning you can't make fun of it so you just sound stupid. Third you're a liar, anyone ass dumb and incompetent as you can not own your own place, God just won't allow it. You lose, stop trying.
Person1233 12
Jgood, please accept this douchebag of the day award.
Raleigh_bruh 7
Lol Freeze, you're an ass. :P That was pretty funny though.
Blame_The_Dog 0
OMG 119- you reminded me of what Jfag looks like! that guy on tool academy the one that kept crying over everything! Teary tool was his name I think. Okay teary tool time to go nuh-nights!
alisa_am 0
JGood you know absolutely nothing, I have seen one comment from you and already know you are one of the largest douchebags to walk the face of this planet. Who gave you the access to Fmylife? Big mistake on their part. Quit bitching.
Raleigh_bruh 7
#126 - "Who gave you the access to Fmylife"? It's the internet.. Anyone is allowed in, even kids. Jk :D Hi, Alisa! Tell Anna to not type me anything harmful for that post! :x
FFML_314 11
Freeze, I just have to say that was hilarious! Alisa, welcome. :) Raleigh, leave her alone. :P
JGood09 0
Hey call me what you want, Douche, Dick, Asshole. It's cool I take pride in being an asshole cause it's fun, If being a dick to people was a job i'd be rich. so whatever I know I'm right in what the **** I say
OliviaxTrick 0
jgood this is a site for people to read posts and then comment their opinions. if you're so fed up with it then don't visit this site. quit your bitchin and put on your big boy pants.
Blame_The_Dog 0
No, Jfag you're wrong again. To be an asshole or a dick, you'd have to actually offend people. But by trying to offend people you're actually motivating them to offend you. So basically if being a dick was a job, you'd be poor an live with your parents, kinda like now except you'd have a job...
julie3841 11
63 it went inbetween her breasts.
FFML_314 11
JGood, you think you're right but, you're not. You're wrong, very, very wrong. Infact, everything that you say is wrong. You are a complete and total failure. Give up now before it gets any worse for you and everyone around you. I know how disappointed your parents must be and anymore effort in life on your part, will have serious repercussions. Just please stop all actions and hold your breath.
Blame_The_Dog 0
140- I think I love you.
JGood09 0
yea and what the **** do you do all day besides sit on here and suck everyones **** on this site
Blame_The_Dog 0
LMAO to the two fags trying to team up on me, ok listen hear Paris Hilton, re-read your last comment. Did you do it? Did you read it?Yeah you're a ******* moron go away. An as for teary tool over here I've embarrases you so many times and your comeback is I sit here all day?? when you've been a member longer than me? I started Fml 2 days ago get your facts straight. You got shut down again.
JGood09 0
ok still doesnt answer my question. and i think ffml is still mad at me cuz of your dead friend burnin in hell huh
Blame_The_Dog 0
what question? my job? I'm in school majoring in criminal justice. I'm gonna be a state trooper. And why would you make fun of someones friend if they're dead that's pretty ****** up
JGood09 0
who cares if its ****** up i laughed
illmatic2 16
ydi for smoking.
superbadd 0
haha I love you freeze xD
MikeG023 0
jgood calm the hell down ur cluless and have no idea
Miss_Grace 0
OK, everyone. Simmer down now. This is a place for fun ;-)
Raleigh_bruh 7
Hey Miss_Grace, question. I sent you guys an email well over 8 hours ago, when will I be getting a reply?
tienjt 3
You probably do smoke, Jgood, or you wouldn't act like something's up your ass just because people say "YDI for smoking." YDI for smoking.
dirtyrussian97 0
oh I wanna get in on this!! haha well anyway jgood you are wrong on pretty much everything so I think it's settled that you should shut up since I said so...
dirtyrussian97 0
oh and taylor1233 haha look at you trying to defend someone it's pathetic really how bad you are at comebacks and insults "blame the bitch"? haha really? where did you come up with that one? I bet you had to go through college to come up with that
dirtyrussian97 0
hmmmmm just saw the "burn in hell" comment from you jgood tsk tsk not really a great thing to say is it? what would your chain smoking, physically abused, alcoholic mother think? oh that's right haha she's too busy drinking while being beaten by your unemployed father who's on probation to give a half a shit about you haha I mean what else could your parents be to have raised a little beast like you? haha
Raleigh_bruh 7
#288 - He shut up a long time ago, it's just you and some other dude here now talking down on him. Also, you guys should be careful. I don't know how long you've been here, but there's a moderator up there (Miss_Grace) that just posted not too long. Which means they're watching this Fml.. If you don't want to get banned/warned/whatever then I suggest you message JGood and handle your issue with him there. Not trying to sound like a douche, just trying to help. :P Ok, bye! *walks away from convo*
Apolloholix13 0
JGood, your insecurity is pathetic, yet hilarious.
Raleigh_bruh 7
No problem at all. :P
Jetsu 0
dont think your high and mighty cuz you dont smoke! your even more annoying than smokers cuz smokers arent bitching 24/7 about non smokera
hotshots98 0
119 wins.
natsaysheyyy 16
Well, you DO deserve that shit for smoking. Just like if I get alcohol in my hair for drinking, that's what I deserve. If you wish to kill your lungs and conceive cancer, be my guest. I don't give a **** if you die. However, don't go around complaining and expect to get some sympathy, because I surely will hand you none. What the hell else do you expect people to say? "Oh, I'm sorry OP...your life sucks" when it's your own damn fault? Take some responsibility for your actions and YOU grow up.
CurseYourLove 0
ydi for smoking
melainie 0
hey what does ydi stand for?
marc_is_me 0
26 lol he's Lying it actually means you deserved it
WEEBZ 0
you deserve it BOURACKSHAK
Blame_The_Dog 0
26 it means you deserve it :) cute baby btw, both of you:)
awhsum 0
it means you deserve it
deathnotedeluxe 0
ydi now you look as bad as you smell.
hedgehogs 0
Consider this a wake-up call from the universe or whomever: time to quit.
nerdsgetmehot 22
@28 Agreed. If you don't like the consequences of smoking, maybe it's time to quit the habit...Because I've seen what can happen, and it can get a lot worse than just a couple of cigarette burns. :/
im_banned 0
26 it means u dum idiot
Blame_The_Dog 0
stfu with your ugly ass hair. I've seen you call 3 people dumb and every comment you post you spell words wrong and make a complete fool of yourself. You look like a complete fag too, and that isn't you, you're still a fag for having an ugly ass dude as your pic. Pussy.
Apolloholix13 0
get wrecked. and oh dude, your comment would be UDI.
vacantdreamer 0
cigarettes*
krisfersays 0
You also spelled cigarettes* wrong, just saying..
brainiac94 0
30, it stands for you deserve it.
krisfersays 0
Jesus Christ, I hate posting on a damn app.
Blame_The_Dog 0
no shit I did, iPod autocorrect changes it to ciggarettes when I try to put one g. Whatever I made my point about his hair
OliviaxTrick 0
way to go butterfingers.
FYLDeep 25
Still probably not nearly as unsightly as your lungs, but apparently you don't care about them anyway.
that1guy1985 0
smoking is awesome!!
_Gabbie_ 0
and means you deserve it :)
Fichael 0
omg its L