Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML
Today, while browsing through Walmart, I slipped on a piece of clothing and fell backwards into an obese lady’s butt. When I landed, she farted. FML
Today, a bratty kid at Walmart called my mom a "fat bitch" when she wasn't walking fast enough for him. Enraged, I gave him the meanest death glare I could muster and I tore him a new one, right in front of his mother, who then defended her kid, saying that my mom and I should both lose a few pounds. FML
Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when a large lady and her friend blocked the aisle I was trying to go down. After saying, "Excuse me," twice and being ignored, I pushed my way through. After getting past, I looked back and noticed she was glaring at me while signing to her friend. FML
Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML
Today, I walked two miles to the store, filled my cart with groceries, and got to the cashier… only to find I had forgotten my wallet. I tried to explain but got the nastiest stank-eye from the cashier, the manager, and everyone in line behind me. I walked two miles home, hungry and embarrassed. FML
Today, I was at Walmart. A guy in a mobility scooter bumped into me, then told me to "get the fuck out of the way." When I told him to watch his mouth, he got up and shoved me into a shelf. Just a few minutes prior, he'd yelled that he was paralyzed from the waist down. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping, when an elderly lady walked up to me and tripped over her own feet. I caught her by the arm, at which point she shrieked at me for "groping" her. She ended up smirking as security threw me out of the store. FML
Today, I was at work at Walmart, casually walking in the middle of the store, when my foot caught on something, so I went flying forward and yelled, being caught off guard, to the point I had to pretend I was running for 3 seconds, then someone blocked my path so I suddenly had to stop. Everyone was staring at me. FML
Today, when I told a gentleman that, no, he couldn't have cash back on his return without a receipt, he started screaming at me that I was calling his mother a liar. He told me to lawyer up and yelled at me for smiling at him. He also screamed at me to go on a diet as he left the store. FML
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Top comments
zandalee 19
Especially if you are so precious that you feel you are too good for Walmart...
heinous966 15
I'm sorry he gave you such a lard time.
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Comments (150)
edwardsgrrl 6
I hate that everyone is lumping all WalMarts together. Not every WalMart is horrible. The one near me, while yes its way too crowded at times, is not bad at all. I make decent money and do 90% of my shopping there. Its a Supercenter so we buy our groceries there too. Some WalMarts are terrible but don't lump them all.
QueenSaru 28
This! We have three Wal-Mart's in the city I live in. One everyone avoids because it's poorly managed, always messy/filthy, but the other two are great and while always busy, they're not disproportionately understaffed or untidy.
Ameel_fml 19
I don't think it's Walmart that's necessarily bad. It's just that, because Walmart is cheap and has such a wide variety of products, a large number of people go there. So there's a higher chance of assholes being there.
jw90 18
Sucks you had to resort shopping at Walmart. I hate that place.
georjayy 11
You should have pants him he would ha trouble getting them up!
amburr17 6
I never have a problem shopping at Walmart you snob
Ziggy122 15
Everyone getting all offended and calling OP pompous... Please. Don't act like you don't avoid Walmart if you can. It's a well-known fact that the place is a shithole and attracts the scummiest of people.
ozan4676 8
In the few towns I've lived in at Louisiana, Walmart's been a pretty great place for the last 8 years I can remember of my life.
CeeCee_fml 16
We look for Wal-Marts wherever my family goes. I never had a bad experience there either. But congratulations for sounding just as "pompous" as the OP!
nightbirdblue 27
I've seen used needles inside of a Target bathroom before. Does that make all Targets shitholes? I've seen someone dragging a dead deer in the parking lot of a Kmart before. Does that that make all Kmarts shitholes? I've seen a Food Lion have a huge fist fight happens at the front doors. Does that make all Food Lions shitholes?
demonmonkey 13
YDI for going to WalMart
ohrlly7457 7
God forbid you have to settle for the store of the working class.
estelle1998_fml 3
I'm glad that when you're broke, the top of your priorities is bacon
QueenSaru 28
I worked for Wal-Mart from age 16 to age 23 until I switched to my current job, I had full time health benefits, paid vacation, and stock options... so um... not all Wal-Mart's are evil towards their employees. We also got a stock bonus once a year if the district was in the black.
ohhhsnapple 14
I don't care that OP said he "resorted" to shopping at Walmart...he said that a person was "posing as a human being". Who says that? So rude.
Ameel_fml 19
To b fair, OP probably wouldn't have said it if the person didn't knock them to the ground just to get to the freakin' bacon.
ohhhsnapple 14
That still doesn't justify it. And I'm sure that isn't exactly how it happened...it's not like the guy yelled, "outta my way, I need me some bacon!"
Ameel_fml 19
I don't know... if some asshole knocked me to the ground for no reason, I think it's perfectly justified to call them names. But then, maybe I'm just used to asshole customers. Because I think OP's story is perfectly believable.
nightbirdblue 27
I kinda can't help to wonder if OP was in such a negative mind set already that perhaps they were just quick to blame others for anything bad that happened. It sounds like OP went in there expecting to be degraded by the experience. There could be a chance that OP was somehow in the wrong, but their sense of self wouldn't let them blame themselves. OP could of been standing in the middle of the isle for example, just staring blankly at the bacon. Also another example is perhaps OP was glaring at people or muttering as they went through the store. The person who shoved him may have done it on accident. There's a thousand different things that OP may not of mentioned that could affect how justified they are in their name calling.