Health: Today, at the gym, some muscle head idiot started yelling at...

By juggalomurderer59 - 12/11/2014 16:00 - United States

Today, at the gym, some muscle head idiot started yelling at the treadmill for not going fast enough, and I muttered "roid rage". Apparently said roids give him superhuman hearing, because he heard me from the other side of the room, and threatened to kill me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 794

You deserved it 9 539

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Same thing different taste

By dearme - 02/06/2009 01:53 - United States

Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 276

You deserved it 69 592

Smash the patriarchy

By Anonymous - 05/07/2022 02:00

Today, at the gym, a guy yelled at me to stop lifting more than his son, because I was embarrassing him by being a girl and lifting more. His son must have been 15 and I almost qualified for the Olympics, but sure I’ll hold back to spare the feelings of a misogynistic 15 year-old little bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 292

You deserved it 186

Don't do this

By Anonymous - 31/07/2024 22:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was at the gym trying to work up the courage to ask a girl out. She was on the treadmill, and I thought it would be cute to wave hello. Instead, she looked horrified and sped up, then slipped and fell off the treadmill. She thought I was mocking her, and now everyone at the gym hates me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 211

You deserved it 410

Gym culture

By Anonymous - 08/05/2023 10:00 - United States

Today, I went to the gym. Once in the changing room, I realized I'd left my headphones at home. I had to work out without any music, so I spent the next 90 minutes being reminded how loud and obnoxious some gym-goers can be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 676

By Shotacon - 07/04/2016 03:06 - United States - Woodbury

Today, while using the leg press at the gym, some guy thought he could use more weight than me since I look really young. He hurt himself. He then blamed me and tried to get me kicked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 138

You deserved it 1 304

By fuckoffandfuckoffagainyoucunt - 17/08/2012 16:27 - United Kingdom - Sittingbourne

Today, I was at the gym, when a pretty overweight guy started staring and eventually taunting me. Let me tell you, lines such as "Lay off the cake, fatty!" and "I can see your gut hanging out your ass, for fuck's sake!" don't exactly boost one's self-confidence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 608

You deserved it 2 771

Fitness is overrated

By Frankie says relax - 10/12/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. As I was on the treadmill, I accidentally hit the emergency stop button. In my attempt to play it cool, I tried to pretend it was intentional and yelled, "I've reached my fitness goal for the day!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 686

Nice guys

By fatgirl4 - 20/07/2009 23:31 - United States

Today, I was at the gym running with intensity on the treadmill. As I was working out, I noticed a few guys behind me staring at me. I figured they were checking me out because I was losing some weight and looking better. Turns out they were betting on how much longer "Fat Ass" could last. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 178

You deserved it 6 644

By dontrapeme - 26/09/2012 10:30 - United States

Today, while at the gym, a very large man walked over to me and said, "I like wearing all orange to the gym." Not wanting to be rude, I asked why. He looks me up and down and said, "It reminds me of prison." I think I'm going to be jumped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 944

You deserved it 1 945

By Anonymous - 05/01/2010 20:16 - United States

Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 059

You deserved it 36 592

Seabiscuit218 12

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:03

Because treadmills will go faster if you yell at them.

Welshite 39

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:04

Don't worry. The treadmill will keep him running in place, and he'll never reach you no matter how slow you run.

Comments

caleb_9756 14

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:01

Seabiscuit218 12

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:03

Because treadmills will go faster if you yell at them.

ojskyguy 8

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:36

OP's name fits the FML quite well.

thepelvicwoo 8

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:39

Brace yourself, here come the angry juggalos.

trickiestboss 10

Thursday 13 November 2014 4:54

voice activation of course.

garrett_8614 14

Thursday 13 November 2014 8:03

"GO FASTER TREADMILL" "I'M GOING AS FAST AS I CAN JOHN! I HATE WHEN YOU GET LIKE THIS."

incoherentrmblr 21

Thursday 13 November 2014 23:41

*Surpasses the Treadmill speed and runs through the wall like the Juggernaut in X-Men and/or Kool Aid Guy*

Welshite 39

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:04

Don't worry. The treadmill will keep him running in place, and he'll never reach you no matter how slow you run.

Ltsdragons 19

Thursday 13 November 2014 6:02

Or how fast he runs

WCARlover 34

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:05

Yeah you probably should keep comments to yourself at the gym

wallamanut 14

Thursday 13 November 2014 11:29

he did though. he mumbled it to himself. he didn't yell it across the gym or anything.

WCARlover 34

Thursday 13 November 2014 12:43

I meant in his head

gurbism 16

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:07

Sounds like you were right about his rage issues

Gittoh 21

Thursday 13 November 2014 12:09

steroids makes you insane !

twistedgrifter 8

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:09

Why treadmill no go faster?!?! Hulk Smash!!!!

cherry_popper69 11

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:12

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

blondeamazonian 18

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:16

Last I checked, yelling and muttering are very different things... Just throwing that out there.

oathkeeper99 31

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:14

They have FML in the afterlife? Sweet!

diving_fml 30

Thursday 13 November 2014 4:38

actually its FMD, fu*k my death...

SarahSehhati 40

Thursday 13 November 2014 5:22

He is hiding in the bathroom lol

Liamj774 36

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:16

Well props for speaking everyone's thoughts. Hopefully you're alright.

EuphoricSadness 18

Thursday 13 November 2014 0:39

He's just like Superman, except he's easily upset, in a gym, and possibly on drugs.

wyverntail 15

Thursday 13 November 2014 18:01

Sounds more like the Hulk to me.

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 31 093

You deserved it 3 098

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You deserved it 82

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 29 694

You deserved it 39 027

Today, I was diagnosed with diabetes. I went to tell my grandpa, who immediately said, "I'm sorry, let's go get ice cream to cheer you up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 928

You deserved it 3 933

Today, I went to the dentist for a routine check-up, and halfway through the appointment, the dentist exclaimed, "Oops!" Turns out, he accidentally glued my lips together while fixing a tiny chip in my front tooth. I spent the next two hours communicating through exaggerated facial expressions and hand gestures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 529

You deserved it 86

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I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 65

Today, I was on the road, driving home. Before I'd headed out, I'd scored six amazing large house plants for free. My kids picked them up for me, and delivered them to my dining room. My husband put them out on the patio for me, in the sun, and burned them. Bye bye $100+ in free plants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 799

You deserved it 199

Today, my boss told me that he’d hired me because he thought I looked intelligent. He then went on to say that it was about time that I proved that I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 223

You deserved it 1 501