Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
LANGUAGE, SON!
Today, I was home on leave and having breakfast with my parents and my younger brothers. I guess I got too used to the rougher language around the Army barracks where I'm stationed. At the breakfast table, I asked my Mom to "pass me the f***ing butter." FML
Today, I saw a man in an army uniform. As a bit of a patriot, I went up to thank him for his service. After about 10 minutes of me going on and on, he started laughing. He wasn't a soldier. FML
Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML
Today, while making small talk with a veteran, I made the mistake of using the phrase "Cost an arm and a leg". He was a double amputee. FML
Incomplete freedom
Today, my dad drunkenly ranted about how I should volunteer for the military because of the crisis in the Middle East. I refused; I'm in college on two scholarships and have listened to stories of why his service still gives him nightmares. I had to hide all the phones to keep him from calling the recruiters. FML
Benefits
Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML
Today, I bought some flowers. As I was checking out, the cashier asked, "Aww, these for your mom? How sweet." I responded they were for a girl I liked. She laughed and said, "Sorry…" FML
Cheers!
Today, I saw some servicemen sitting outside a café, and I went over to thank them for their service. They waited till after I was done shaking their hands before they told me that they were just actors on their lunch break. FML
Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML
Top comments
Dusk1 0
We should ship your mother over to Iraq. God bless our soldiers.
alwaysalady 0
That's awful. I give soldiers hugs and tell them thank you. Your mom needs to learn a little respect.
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Comments (721)
snowbordnelephnt 0
I say again, if you think "us" should be replaced with "ours", you are wrong
wtfreally1 0
so who exactly is poccessing the vending machine that is near the OP. the phrase is basically the soldier's eyes met ours but for spatial location and identification we are told he is standing near a vending machine. (the soldier's) becomes the (soldier at the vending machine near us)'s, but s's turns into s'. so yeah....now you know
Arkvoodle 0
Holy shit that is ******* terrifying.
robbietherabbit 0
my news source is the daily show
sugarcakebomb 0
why apologize, your mom is right.
starslugger09 0
#157...read it.
nosila_fml 0
#175, shut the **** up. You have no idea what you're ******* talking about, and therefore, you should go ahead and sew your mouth shut and tie your hands behind your back so you can never say/type ignorant words like that again. Dumb bitch.
nosila_fml 0
Your mom is one ignorant bitch. I only WISH I could have been at the same place at the same time in the airport as you. I would have blasted her like nothing else, she needs to learn some ******* respect. Whether you agree with the war itself or not - we are lucky to have these soldiers who put their lives on the line each and every day because people like your mom aren't brave enough to ******* do it. God, people like her absolutely disgust me.
Freedomfighter_fml 0
Wow some of you guys ate really stupid....without our soldiers fighting for us, we would not even be able to post anything on here because we wouldn't have the freedom to do so...hell we may not even be able to walk down the street without fear of being shot or something, yet we still have people that disrespect the people that keep them safe... You disrespect the person that allows us to go to school of our own choosing to become the person WE want to be, where there are governments around the world that tells people what there going to do For their life...our soldiers over there is one of the best things that has happened to those people in Iraq. What have you gone through "oh no I broke a nail, what am I gonna do?". They had to go through genocide and constant fear that we won't ever understand. Our soldiers are a blessing to them. America is a beacon to the world calling others to join the cause and fight for freedom, but a lot of the countries in the middle east are not strong enough to fight. We help. We bring freedom to the once opprssed.
warhorse57 0
You are lucky that soldier didn't punch YOUR STUPID IGNORANT MOTHER right in the mouth. It's guys like that soldier who DIE for your right to say STUPID things like YOUR STUPID IGNORANT MOTHER DID.
lyssa61189 0
F ur mom. us soldiers sacrifice alot for the ppl of this country. we leave our own families to keep yours safe!
dk_fml 0
The only reason your mother is free to say the shit she did was because of solider's just like the one she was badmouthing. Saying sorry was great, but you should have said something to her, too.