Love: Today, at 2am, I heard a strange sound coming from the hallway....

By Stinky - 20/11/2011 10:23 - United States

Today, at 2am, I heard a strange sound coming from the hallway. I walked over, only to discover my drunk boyfriend pissing in the closet. On my favorite shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 183

You deserved it 4 892

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Same thing different taste

By gp28 - 18/02/2010 20:08 - United States

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 915

You deserved it 4 004

By anti-peecleaner - 22/11/2010 22:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 422

You deserved it 5 216

By wtf - 30/01/2015 09:00 - United States - Dearborn

Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 586

You deserved it 2 640

By TooShortToCleanThat - 20/03/2015 03:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 448

You deserved it 3 750

Boozed up

By speechless - 13/07/2013 14:32 - United States - Mitchell

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 319

You deserved it 4 631

By Anonymous - 28/11/2011 03:00 - United States

Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 623

You deserved it 4 154

By Blie - 04/09/2018 20:30

Today, I was so drunk that I pissed myself in a hotel hallway while wearing a dress. My shoes squished all the way back to the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 044

You deserved it 4 171

Drunken antics

By Anonymous - 10/12/2020 11:02 - Canada - Sherbrooke

Today, I woke up to the sound of my boyfriend full-on peeing into our tiny trash bin. The trash bin was basket material, so the pee was all over the floor. Once he'd finished, he went to bed, passed out and left me to clean it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 890

You deserved it 137

Not a morning person

By Anonymous - 15/07/2021 20:01 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 524

You deserved it 733

By 21! - 03/07/2012 01:53 - United States - Schenectady

Today, while walking around my college campus, I passed by a dorm where a drunk guy was peeing out one of the top floor windows while his drunk friends cheered him on. That guy is my boyfriend. Lucky me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 388

You deserved it 6 845

Bebbo_fml 21

Sunday 20 November 2011 16:25

Make sure you shove them into his face while firmly saying "No!"

MegaTroller_fml 5

Sunday 20 November 2011 16:26

It's time for him to come out.

Comments

Ikickmidgets 11

Sunday 20 November 2011 18:43

sounds like he had an amazing night

TipOfTheHat 10

Sunday 20 November 2011 18:46

He doesn't appreciate your fashion sense

princessmollysue 9

Sunday 20 November 2011 18:47

That's nasty

hatchet27 0

Sunday 20 November 2011 18:49

She not mad that her bf is a stumbling drunk, she's mad cause her shoes are ruined. Wtf

AcidRa1n 0

Sunday 20 November 2011 18:51

My FML posts are way better but they never get published Jesus...

aaronwsmith 0

Sunday 20 November 2011 19:02

ex boyfriend??

stewpididiot 11

Sunday 20 November 2011 19:14

Make him wear the shoes to some AA meetings !!!

Mananda 0

Sunday 20 November 2011 19:46

Pee on him when he passes out?

jack_truth_hurts 1

Sunday 20 November 2011 19:51

You're dating him, you deserve it. Get a guy that isn't a stupid drunk

cloakedn007 1

Sunday 20 November 2011 19:57

I've done that at a party once lol

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Health Awkward Jewelry Kids Fight Family Love Work Relatable Students Noise Birds Animals Sleep Mental health Medication Contraception Racism Pregnancy Relationship advice Cheating Friends Teenagers Sex Intimacy Embarrassing Revenge Food Cats

The Top

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 791

You deserved it 1 707

It's great to see you ! How was july ? Hot, sweaty, flirty ? How I miseed talking to you (and getting one or two comments if we're lucky enough). But let's not complain, a whole month welcoming artists for their second rounds who gave us brand new il...

I agree, your life sucks 7

You deserved it 8

The Top

Today, I went to a Bat Mitzvah. We played a game where all of the girls grabbed one of their shoes and placed it in the middle. Then, all of the guys had to pick a shoe. Whatever guy picked the shoe, the girl had to dance with. No one picked my shoe. Everyone else was dancing except for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 428

You deserved it 5 099

Today, I saw my husband at a restaurant, laughing with a hot woman. He'd told me he was at a meeting with the VP of his company. Furious, I barged in and started screaming at them, calling him a cheater and a liar. Turns out the woman was actually the VP of his company, and they were in the middle of the meeting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 297

You deserved it 3 656

Today, I was hit in the head by a golf ball. I wasn't near a golf course, and nobody was anywhere in sight. I'm still trying to figure out what happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 826

You deserved it 3 875

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents, despite my long-standing protests. Over the next hour, they asked her if she'd ever considered becoming a swinger, why not, if she'd ever consider it in future, and to keep them in mind if she does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 465

You deserved it 3 086

Today, I brought my boyfriend of 2 weeks home to meet my mom and she started talking about how she really wants a lot of grand-kids. He called 2 hours later and broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 926

You deserved it 7 006

Today, I was at the gym. I'm 360 lbs and have finally decided it's time to change that. Some girl and her two bitch friends thought it'd be fun to follow me and belittle me at everything I did. When I mentioned it to the staff, they said that they were just "encouraging" me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 148

You deserved it 2 273

Same thing different taste

Boozed up

Drunken antics

Not a morning person

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