Today, at 2am, I heard a strange sound coming from the hallway. I walked over, only to discover my drunk boyfriend pissing in the closet. On my favorite shoes. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML
Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML
Today, I was working at 5 am at my office desk when I heard trickling water. I ran to the foyer, turned on the light, expecting to see my incontinent 16 year-old golden retriever. Instead, I witnessed my still drunk, high and comatose husband standing at the top of the stairs pissing on the carpet stairs. Again. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML
Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML
Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML
Today, I was so drunk that I pissed myself in a hotel hallway while wearing a dress. My shoes squished all the way back to the room. FML
Today, I got home from a holiday to find out that my flatmate had thrown a party. Everything seemed fine at first, then I noticed that someone had taken a dump in my running shoes that were in my bedroom closet. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my boyfriend full-on peeing into our tiny trash bin. The trash bin was basket material, so the pee was all over the floor. Once he'd finished, he went to bed, passed out and left me to clean it all up. FML
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Top comments
Bebbo_fml 21
Make sure you shove them into his face while firmly saying "No!"
MegaTroller_fml 5
It's time for him to come out.
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Comments (144)
gyroballer 0
he thought he was in narnia
every1luvsboners 11
Tape them to his face after he passes out.
Bofferding_fml 6
Pee on his playstation 3!
sakforduc 0
Woah there. That's taking it too far! Lol
Blueglasscup 18
At least you found out before putting them on.
SleepingMonster 0
If he was my boyfriend, I would dump his drunken ass.
Blueglasscup 18
That seems a little extreme... People do dumb things when drunk.
Igor_g5 0
I agree with 19. Yes, people do stupid stuff when they're drunk but pissing on shoes in a closet is a bit much.
yesio12 13
Hit him with the newspaper and tell him that he's been a very very bad boy. Then, teach him a lesson ; )
perdix 31
Rub his nose in it and send him to his crate? Is that the lesson you are referring to? If you mean something else, maybe you can show me. I'll bring my leash and collar.
vitaldisplay 0
Pee back on his shoes. And if he has an Xbox, pee on that too.
wordbigbird 0
Don't pee on a mans xbox, we will then assume it's fair game to pee over everything you own
hazumu_fml 8
Is that some kinda man law?
False_Stupidity 42
^ something like that
anddaman 0
first
cj7geojeep 0
Really?
Ergayles 9
I think what he meant to say was 20th.
kjb1234 5
First what
iam_yummylicious 12
Please don't delete this comment. Its hilarious.
OhDarrenCriss 6
Make him buy you a new pair! xD
perdix 31
He obviously was envious and decided to "mark" your shoes as his own. Must be tough to date a cross-dresser.