Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was in a grocery store when a little boy ran up out of nowhere, hugged my leg, then said, “Mommy!” I looked down and said, “Hey there, kiddo!” Right then, his actual mom walked up and gave me a look that seemed like it could set me on fire. The kid then looked up at me and said, “You’re prettier than my real mom.” FML
Today, while waiting in the queue at a supermarket checkout, my three-year-old daughter yells out, "Mom! Mom! Is that a man or a lady in front?" Embarrassed, I reply, "Honey, can't you see that it's a... it's a... a..." FML
Today, my mother asked a woman at the clothing store we go to all the time when her baby was due. Turns out the woman isn't pregnant. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping, feeling good about myself, until when I was waiting in line at the checkout, a small kid in his mother's arms in front turned to look straight at me and said, "Ewwwww." FML
Today, I was at the grocery store, when a little boy looked up at me and asked if I was a prostitute. FML
Today, I waved at a baby while standing in line in a store. It started screaming. Its mom looked over in mild concern and gave me a disturbed glare before moving to the next checkout counter over. FML
Today, I was with my dad at the supermarket and this guy was checking me out. My dad yells at him with a grin, "I know! I make beautiful babies!" FML
Today, a stranger at the grocery store rubbed my belly and asked me when I'm due. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I was at Aéropostale with some friends when I noticed a woman glaring at me. When we got to the checkout, the woman still had her eyes on me, so I asked why she was staring. She snapped, "If you had kept your legs closed, you wouldn't be pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, in a bustling store, a woman waved at me. I didn’t recognize her but waved back enthusiastically and approached her. She frowned and said, “I was waving at my daughter.” Her daughter was behind me. A store clerk saw the whole thing and said, “Happens a lot to lonely people.” FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
BIGBOY4rmAHM 19
You should've told her you were santa and that because she hurt your feelings, she's going on the naughty list next year.
IBelongToJeebus 0
Bitch went there.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (122)
joewaka89 0
Fat ****
IKickPuppiesHard 16
Meh all children are ignorant. Happens. I would have just flicked her off and went about my business. You should really only be mad if the parent said "yes".
mrsayuso 0
I believe it is "flipped" her off, and your a douche. Who flips off little kids?
RadGirl212 4
You're*
IKickPuppiesHard 16
As far as I'm concerned you understand the term so I couldn't care less what you thought I meant. Whats wrong with FLICKING off a kid? It's not like they will get offended and go cry. If they do then they understand the meaning behind the gesture and would be old enough to know blatantly being mean to someone who is being nice to you warrants them getting flicked off in the first place.
boredfishing 0
Watch out, he kicks puppies... Hard
StoryOfTheYear 15
I can just see OP's hand stopping in mid-wave.
imp4ct 15
Ohh that hurts! Try loosing some pounds, you will feel way better and you'll have more selfconfidence ;)
dumboears 8
LOSING. Not loosing. Learn the difference!
IBelongToJeebus 0
Aww 19 you beat me to it. :(
teyyoshi 19
it does good for us who are learing english as a second language,sometimes bad spellings baffle me a lot
StoryOfTheYear 15
Glad you're avidly learning another language. It opens up a lot of doors later in life.
teyyoshi 19
guys, thank you for correcting my mistakes, i will go further with your help! BTW, happy new year!
Epic_Monster 2
Why did you have to say it first? Lol
FYLDeep 26
Go up to the little kid and say, "I'm not pregnant, I'm just full from the last little kid I ate."
desireev 18
That was epic.. And it just made my day! Thank you!! Haha
ashtonkay 7
Aha classic(:
iamabamf 17
You deserved it for being fat. Just kidding, that sucks. **** your life.
elephantom12 9
It may seem like you have some excess body fat but that doesn't mean that the little girl can run faster than you. You should have chased after her, put fear in her eyes and she will never insult another person ever again.
jaeyuuji 1
I don't know if anyone else noticed but OP is a guy, not a girl lol
blueeyedwolf 10
No one's comments indicated they thought the OP was female...
ThatLooksSticky 16
I think everyone did, since the little girl asked if a MAN was pregnant. That's why it's an FML.
iamabamf 17
You're dumb. How about you actually read the FML before posting idiotic comments about it next time? Good idea? Yes.
KoolKat369 5
He's just saying that because he thought op was a girl before thinking it through a little. Put a green hat on before making a comment trying to look cool. Idiot.
Nuttyicecream 2
Dang! I hate when that happens to me >.< Worst remark anybody can receive.
NippsSlipps 10
Children can be so cruel.