Today, as a limo driver, I had to drive 8 guys for a night-out from their wives. I put the Michigan/Rutgers game on the radio, thinking they would appreciate that. Apparently, they wanted to listen to their "pump-up" songs instead, which were mostly Katy Perry songs. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I had a 10 hour drive to Las Vegas with only 2 CDs, Taylor Swift and Jason Mraz, and my girlfriend who thinks she's a good singer. FML
Today, I was singing and drumming on the steering wheel in my car while stuck in traffic, only to realize the car next to me was full of my carpooling coworkers, all staring at me in disbelief. They spent the day at the office requesting songs. FML
Today, I gave my new boss a ride, since his car died. I probably should have checked the music before I started the car; I'm not sure hearing "Grandpa pissed his pants again…" as the opener to a song made a good impression on him. FML
Today, I had to sit in a three-seat truck between my dad and his best friend on a 4-hour trip to Detroit. It was great, besides their incessant crude jokes and stories, including chafing ball sacks, and naming their new radio station, "Chicks With Dicks Radio." FML
Today, I was driving to a blind date my friend set me up on. Feeling pretty excited, I started singing to Katy Perry. I look over to see a man laughing at me, I flipped him the bird and drove off. Little did I know, he was my date. FML
Today, I had to use my husband's vehicle. He has been spiraling into a mean, bigoted man. I got into his vehicle and the radio was on a station that was spewing weird stereotypes of women, and making fun of anyone who is not a hard supporter of a certain orange politician/businessman. FML
Today, I was in the car going to a concert with my family. I was listening to my iPod, when the wheel broke and I couldn't change the song. So for the rest of the trip, I was stuck either listening to my parents arguing, or Don't Worry, Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin on repeat. FML
Today, my Uber driver tried to detour my trip home to take me on a date to Waffle House, even after I showed zero interest and talked about my boyfriend non-stop. FML
Today, after pulling up to my girlfriend's house for dinner with her parents, one of my favorite songs begin to play on the radio. After my 3 minutes of air drumming, I look up to see my girlfriend and her parents bouncing with laughter. FML
Today, I had to drive my drunk parents home from a party. They leaned out the window and barked at everyone we passed all the way home. FML
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Top comments
sea_cucumber_11 11
I guess that wasn't a Perry enjoyable night
mpsteve137 15
Sounds like their wives may of been the ones who wanted a night away from them.
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Comments (97)
DanDRoberts14 7
Hope you weren't a Michigan fan. This season has been awful.
Vlen_fml 20
night out from their wives... riiiiiiight.
pawelthink 14
And nowadays, people call THAT music. Shame.
limabeans101029 21
People shouldn't HAVE to listen to amazing masterpieces of music every time they want to listen to something. Sometimes it's fun to listen to something poppy and catchy. Get off your high horse.
Huddisher 10
Nothing wrong with guys listening to Katy Perry.
missyfiona89 28
I checked, "I agree your life sucks", just because you're a chauffeur. sucks to be you.
kellyem2 20
To be fair, if they were Michigan fans that game really wasn't worth listening to.
niome_fml 9
wow sad life man..
CaptainBlack 18
So what you're saying is now you're pumped up and your life is awesome?
Nickoli42 3
You must've got the wives by mistake.
Jay224 0
Hey douche! At least you have a job. Put earplugs in and suck it up.
Shade1982 21
Well, that escalated quickly...