By DesperateToBeDad - 31/12/2015 11:57 - United Kingdom - Gravenhurst
DesperateToBeDad tells us more.
OP here. Wow, wasn't expecting so many comments! I feel I should probably clarify a few things here: First of all, I have a very vivid imagination and tend to have involuntary daydreams where various scenarios to a situation play out. This was one such case, and doesn't mean I'm violent or am actually contemplating shooting people or anything like that, my mind just rollercoasters through various things happening and I'm just sort of along for the ride. I found this one amusing enough to post on FML. My wife and I are currently looking into fertility tests to find out exactly what the problem is, and will of course consider adoption/fostering if it turns out that natural conception isn't on the cards. Don't worry, I'm not going to abduct anyone's kids or go on a murder spree. :P
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Maybe see a therapist op? Also, there's fertility clinics and treatments you can get to enhance your chances of having a kid. Best of luck!
Maybe think about trying adoption if at all possible. I wish you the best of luck OP with whatever you choose to do.
I agree with your sentiment. I don't think it really matters unless you're the one raising it. "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the blood of the womb." Meaning, the relationships you build on your own are much stronger than the ones built on blood relation.
100- While I don't have a problem with 25's joke, I agree with your general opinion. I have a 5 year old daughter. We have the same sperm donor (abusive asshole doesn't deserve the title of dad), so biologically we're half-sisters. I filed for custody after her mom died in a car accident when she was about 1 year old and have been raising her for a little over 4 years. She is just as much my child as one that I'm the biological mother of would be. I pisses me off when people tell me she's not really my daughter if she's technically my sister.
Get checked out by your doctor to make sure you're fertile enough for regular conception. You could have low sperm count or something or maybe perhaps your wife has some sort of issue. If that's the case you might want to consider in vitro fertilization.
Op is from the uk where it is a lot cheaper to get ivf and in some places the government (by way of the nhs) will pay for a couple of rounds. It's still not cheap but certainly affordable for most people (unless op and wife need to go through multiple rounds instead of 1 or 2)
Guys, I feel like if they've been trying to have a baby for 3 years, they've looked into every conceivable option. Maybe they really haven't thought of certain ways, but chances are they have, and having it suggested to them like its a perfect and obvious solution will probably make them feel worse.
Not sure why everyone is downvoting you. This advice is given to many couples trying to conceive because the female body will often fight off insemenation under mental duress. One of the women who I work with tried for years to get pregnant. Her husband went and talked to their doctor solo and the doctor told him that he should ask her to stop trying and that maybe they weren't ready yet blah blah blah. Basically convince her that he didn't want a kid right now. She got so relaxed and de-stressed because there was no mental pressure to just get pregnant that she conceived within the month. Maybe don't spread YOUR ignorance before knowing how the human body works...
112- I can't speak for anyone else, but I disagree with saying it'll happen eventually. While taking away the stress and pressure can absolutely help some couples, that's not always the case. Sometimes couples just can't get pregnant naturally due to fertility problems that are out of their control, stress or no stress
#128 I agree with you. #112 - sadly not everybody is fertile and capable of conceiving. As #128 said there are people who just can't get pregnant so to say that people trying for a baby are doing something wrong and just need to relax more and they'll definitely conceive is a bit misguided. :-/