Today, after being admitted to the emergency room for severe abdominal pain, my boyfriend shouted out in front of my parents, "At least she isn't pregnant!" FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I had to take an emergency contraceptive. I was talking to my boyfriend about it, and I told him that my stomach really hurt. His response? "Aw. That's just the baby dying." FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML
Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML
Today, I was rushed to the emergency room in crippling pain, thanks to a very dangerous cluster of cysts on my ovaries that could rupture at any time. My boyfriend took this news as my way of denying him sex and broke up with me for "going to obscene lengths" to emasculate him. FML
Today, at 6 weeks pregnant, I went to the ER in the middle of the night for severe abdominal pain, fearing an ectopic pregnancy. Turns out it was just a wayward turd. FML
Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was at their house I got a tummy ache, then had loud explosive diarrhea. Twice. They definitely heard it all. FML
Today, when my boyfriend came home, I was crying and told him I was pregnant. His immediate response was, "Awesome! Pregnant girls are always horny and we won't need protection for the next few months!" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He went outside for a "breather" and never came back. FML
Today, I was lying in bed with the worst stomach cramps ever. My boyfriend came, looked at me writhing in pain, and said, "Well at least if it's a tapeworm you'll get skinnier." FML
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Top comments
meelo88 13
Well at least he was clearing the air... Parents like honesty....
citymayer 7
Well, at least you aren't...
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Comments (118)
Draugen 16
If you weren't such a **** he would not have made that joke.
babyboox333 0
Dum !
JajaSega 1
This would have been better if the test results showed that you were pregnant.
cmayo 3
Why does no one have a sense of humor these days? He was trying to lighten the mood, fucktard.
mrjamjama66 5
Be so much better if you found out you were pregers
hateevryone 15
I don't think he said that to be malicious.
GrammaticalNazi 2
He's getting on your parent's good side. Good for him.
pandacruisn30 3
This is what happened to me!! My parents did not realize I was not a virgin but I had severe pain a couple of times so my boyfriend at the time would take me to the emergency room and the last time he was feed up so he called my mom to get me at the hospital. He flat out said that yea I have been banging her and now she is having pain but not pregnant since I do not want kids. Well 7 years later he cheats on me with a l"lady" who has three kids one is in their 20s I dumped his ass. WEll found out a few months later through a wedding invitation that he married that homewrecker. I wished I had waited for my current boyfriend he is a keeper! It took a long while before my parents would speak to me and trust me again especially my mom!
melissamoshh 0
I think I speak for everyone when I say: who cares...
Freeze_fml 17
Way to be a statistic. Go you.
ReynshineCutting 10
Wow you have really sucky parents if they wouldn't talk to you because you had sex. I'm so sorry for you.
tragicnightmare 15
that guy would make me laugh if he were mine
j_cat187 20
Your boyfriend is stupid. Sadly I would have done something vaguely similar.